Bush Approval Rating Drops Below Zero
Rushlimbo
Posts: 832
The Nation -- President Bush's job approval rating has sunk to just under zero for the first time, according to new polls. Polling experts say that this is an all-time low, and that only certain toxic molds have come close to those numbers in the past. The unusual rating occurred when the President was given an enthusiastic endorsement by former FEMA director Michael Brown.
Earlier this week, Brown was standing on a corner not far from the White House, begging for spare change, when Bush, out riding his bike for the afternoon, ran into him. After puffing Secret Service agents assigned to follow the President on foot and extricate him from any quagmires he might steer himself into caught up with him and disentangled both men from the twisted bicycle spokes, Bush slipped a $100 bill into Brown's paper cup, which prompted the disgraced ex-crony to say, "Bushie, you're doin' a heckuva job." A polltaker standing nearby overheard the favorable assessment, and since anything Brown positively asserts counts for double in the negative sense, and all other respondents had expressed their disapproval of the President's job performance, this drove Bush's approval rating just below the critical zero percent mark, which could be a tipping point for his presidency, some analysts believe.
But Bush's numbers recovered somewhat a few hours later when Brown revealed he had changed his mind and now disapproved of the President's performance. After getting home that night, he said, he discovered that the hundred had a portrait of Dick Cheney instead of Ben Franklin on it. Investigators believe that it was one of the new bills issued by Halliburton, which was recently given a contract by the White House to print its own money.
Brown's sudden reversal lifted the President's poll numbers back up to the more respectable one-tenth of one percent range but did little to stop the erosion of his crucial conservative base. Not only has he lost the support of Cheney, who is said to prefer his new chief of staff, Vlad the Impaler, as an instrument for carrying out his secret agenda, not only has he recently been abandoned by most neoconservatives, neoneanderthals and neobrachiopods, but he has finally lost the last-ditch support of his wife, Laura, his dog, Barney, his twins, Jenna and Barbara, and, according to at least one poll, himself. Called by a pollster at 8:45 PM, just before his bedtime, the President asked sleepily whether Zogby would do anything for attention-deficit disorder and whether it came in capsule or tablet form and then abruptly hung up when the phrase "job performance" came up.
The President's stricken poll numbers led to renewed speculation among economists that it might be time to outsource the job to someplace where it might be performed more competently and for less money. In Poona, India, 22-year-old Bahjaree ("Cindy") Prandra, a customer service representative for an American cellphone company, said that she would be happy to consider the position if it paid more than her current salary of $1.85 an hour, adding that the new requirement that the President be familiar with spoken English would not be a problem. She pointed out that she had studied English grammar for several years in school and, as a further qualification, she is already used to getting angry, demanding phone calls all day and telling people to please calm down, "So," she said, "I'm sure I can handle the neocons."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/thenation/20070326kenning&printer=1;_ylt=AmdoO5nzj9rII.UEDwRban0__8QF
Earlier this week, Brown was standing on a corner not far from the White House, begging for spare change, when Bush, out riding his bike for the afternoon, ran into him. After puffing Secret Service agents assigned to follow the President on foot and extricate him from any quagmires he might steer himself into caught up with him and disentangled both men from the twisted bicycle spokes, Bush slipped a $100 bill into Brown's paper cup, which prompted the disgraced ex-crony to say, "Bushie, you're doin' a heckuva job." A polltaker standing nearby overheard the favorable assessment, and since anything Brown positively asserts counts for double in the negative sense, and all other respondents had expressed their disapproval of the President's job performance, this drove Bush's approval rating just below the critical zero percent mark, which could be a tipping point for his presidency, some analysts believe.
But Bush's numbers recovered somewhat a few hours later when Brown revealed he had changed his mind and now disapproved of the President's performance. After getting home that night, he said, he discovered that the hundred had a portrait of Dick Cheney instead of Ben Franklin on it. Investigators believe that it was one of the new bills issued by Halliburton, which was recently given a contract by the White House to print its own money.
Brown's sudden reversal lifted the President's poll numbers back up to the more respectable one-tenth of one percent range but did little to stop the erosion of his crucial conservative base. Not only has he lost the support of Cheney, who is said to prefer his new chief of staff, Vlad the Impaler, as an instrument for carrying out his secret agenda, not only has he recently been abandoned by most neoconservatives, neoneanderthals and neobrachiopods, but he has finally lost the last-ditch support of his wife, Laura, his dog, Barney, his twins, Jenna and Barbara, and, according to at least one poll, himself. Called by a pollster at 8:45 PM, just before his bedtime, the President asked sleepily whether Zogby would do anything for attention-deficit disorder and whether it came in capsule or tablet form and then abruptly hung up when the phrase "job performance" came up.
The President's stricken poll numbers led to renewed speculation among economists that it might be time to outsource the job to someplace where it might be performed more competently and for less money. In Poona, India, 22-year-old Bahjaree ("Cindy") Prandra, a customer service representative for an American cellphone company, said that she would be happy to consider the position if it paid more than her current salary of $1.85 an hour, adding that the new requirement that the President be familiar with spoken English would not be a problem. She pointed out that she had studied English grammar for several years in school and, as a further qualification, she is already used to getting angry, demanding phone calls all day and telling people to please calm down, "So," she said, "I'm sure I can handle the neocons."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/thenation/20070326kenning&printer=1;_ylt=AmdoO5nzj9rII.UEDwRban0__8QF
War is Peace
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
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Comments
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCnjuJ1pbmc
and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
over specific principles, goals, and policies.
http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg
(\__/)
( o.O)
(")_(")
and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
over specific principles, goals, and policies.
http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg
(\__/)
( o.O)
(")_(")
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
Doing great, Thumbelina. Just got back from a vacation. How are you doing? I see from scanning some recent threads you still have a bloated opinion of yourself, which is OK, we all need some mixture of reality and fantasy i guess.
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
You down with trolls? That's the picture I'm painting for the general public and/or those interested at the moment. That's your problem. You're all scan, no substance. It's either posting an article or being a railbird. That's a sign of general stupidity. What is general stupidity? I have no clue, but it sounds very, very real. See, having a good mixture is actually very nice.
But enough about me. Where'd you go?
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
No thing such as "general stupidity"
"stupidity" is a disorder where the individual suffers from mental retardation.
Sorry, no offense but I dont want to taint my great week by sharing any part of it with you.
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
over specific principles, goals, and policies.
http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg
(\__/)
( o.O)
(")_(")
Shhhhhhhh...he likes to believe he has interesting things to offer. Insights that add to the moving train that would run off the track without imputs from him and a few others (at least that is what he said). Just nod your head when he speaks.
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
http://www.buckfush.com
The love in this thread is so touching...
and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
over specific principles, goals, and policies.
http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg
(\__/)
( o.O)
(")_(")
lol, you said taint.
~Michael Bolton
lol Taint. Taint...
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
lol See... I hit the nail on the head with you Rush. Where'd ya go? Spring break?
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
lol Every day's a vacation for me Rush. You simply walked a week in my shoes. Cherish it.
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
You stalking me or just bored? (everyday is one word btw)
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
I wish I could walk a week in your shoes, then I'd be a week away and you'd be barefoot. Suckah!
LOL. I already told you I would not discuss my trip with you. I made a promise to your mother.
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
lol I guess I did .. walk .. into that one. Ok, enough.
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
lol What happens in the back of a '90 Ford Festiva stays in the back of a '90 Ford Festiva I guess...
But how!?
http://www.dragtimes.com/1990-Ford-Festiva-Pictures-11187.html
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08