A father is Sometimes a Fading Shadow

jboelhow

A Father is Sometimes a Fading Shadow

If you find me beneath the flower petals
leave me be
For I am searching for the stone of remembrance
The ground is soft and dark with a thousand hours of rain
Worms clutter the streets with their dieing ideas of salvation
A fresh smell that dryer sheets try to recreate
filters the lungs when I inhale deeply the fresh afternoon
My fingernails are packed with Mother Nature’s skin
Where are you
as I grow in this garden
with out a gardener
My roots are shallow
Concrete has no nutrient value
Lucky for me that the sun is not prejudice
it cares not where and who shares its rays
I carry the same scientific name
but not the same fragrance as other flowers
As twilight filters my years
I search for the place where my seed originates
The wind, my carrier, is silent
It can only show me how I've arrived
and how to move from this place
I scrape the dirt from my nails for a clue
Under a microscope it shows
where all others have ended
No sign on how to find my stone of remembrance
to capture a fading image
like a bright light still visible after you close your eyes
An image of the gardener...

Side note: this poem was influenced by Pearl Jam's "Release" specially the lines:
"oh dear dad
can you see me now
I am myself
like you somehow
I'll wait up in the dark
for you to speak to me"