06/03/2000

ChrisD

Courageous is the singer
his timbre slowly fades
hearts standing on tables
bodies just escape.

Disarming his defenses
dark denim in the eyes
sincere all the gestures
by chance he never lied.

he writes his Jesus story
translates it to a crowd
even the deaf will sing his song
but gestures leave things out.

When no one glanced at the despair
machines remaining shy
the singer became choir master
waving for their lives.

Kneeling is the singer
they pass near to his waist
nine zeolots give him frozen handshakes
their youth shown on his face.

Singers have to stand
for misery’s divine
bodies he will always count
trembling at nine.

ChrisD

I'd really love a comment on this one. My first language isn't English but my idea is that I did a good job on the english part here. The topic is one that fits her though I dont wanna give too much away.

ChrisD

so is this crap or too difficult? I'd like to know

Steve Dunne

I read this to be about Roskilde, set in the music and harmony of Tremor Christ? I immediately thought of that song.

A very good piece!

ChrisD

Steve Dunne wrote:

I read this to be about Roskilde, set in the music and harmony of Tremor Christ? I immediately thought of that song.

A very good piece!

Wow you are good. I mean that topic is obvious but the fact that you picked out the Tremor Christ rhythmn is pretty well spotted!

thanks I hope the english is not broken too much, i had to look some words up