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Amphitrite

lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
edited August 2006 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
I remember the day
the world washed away.
The oceans combined
to bring me decay.

I held it inside
and rose with the tide.
The crest of a wave
offered a ride.

She told me her name.
She told me she came.
Her lies were divine.
Her lips were insane.

All mouths and tongues,
all breaths and lungs,
and all that we gave
was all for the sun.
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    I like the title, it works very well with the content. :) I could see the lovers entwined in tides and then, evaporating at the touch of the sun.
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    Being Enlightened wrote:
    I like the title, it works very well with the content. :) I could see the lovers entwined in tides and then, evaporating at the touch of the sun.

    hmm "lovers entwined". That's an interesting interpretation of this. That hadn't crossed my mind yet.
  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    Saturnal wrote:
    hmm "lovers entwined". That's an interesting interpretation of this. That hadn't crossed my mind yet.

    Amphitrite, the goddess of the sea -- made me think of the lovers as beings of the sea, created of water, having thier time together and then, evaporating...possibly to be rained into existence, to ride the tides once again. :) It's amazing the different things people can see in what you create! :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • Holey GhostHoley Ghost Posts: 744
    I got an image of two surfers making passionate love, then being washed away by the next tide, only to ride a wave again on a different board, but then that's just me.
    Create Good Things........
    Graduate of the School for Sexual Gifted....magna cum loads
  • Holey GhostHoley Ghost Posts: 744
    I got an image of two surfers making passionate love, then being washed away by the next tide, only to ride a wave again on a different board, but then that's just me.
    Create Good Things........
    Graduate of the School for Sexual Gifted....magna cum loads
  • Holey GhostHoley Ghost Posts: 744
    I guess I got a Double Image...sorry
    Create Good Things........
    Graduate of the School for Sexual Gifted....magna cum loads
  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    Holey Ghost wrote:
    I got an image of two surfers making passionate love, then being washed away by the next tide, only to ride a wave again on a different board, but then that's just me.

    Again, interesting take on it. I'm surprised that poem comes off as something positive...
  • deadnotedeadnote Posts: 1,678
    it sounds beautiful to me!
    set your laughter free

    dreamer in my dream

    we got the guns

    i love you,but im..............callin out.........callin out
  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    deadnote wrote:
    it sounds beautiful to me!

    Thanks very much.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Saturnal wrote:
    Again, interesting take on it. I'm surprised that poem comes off as something positive...

    I'm surprised too, it seems pretty dark and a bit bitter to me.
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  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    justam wrote:
    I'm surprised too, it seems pretty dark and a bit bitter to me.

    Yeah...sometimes I like my poems like I like my women I guess.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Saturnal wrote:
    Yeah...sometimes I like my poems like I like my women I guess.

    LOL!
    I can understand liking dark women, but bitter too?
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  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    justam wrote:
    LOL!
    I can understand liking dark women, but bitter too?

    haha. Dark and bitter go hand-in-hand sometimes.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Saturnal wrote:
    haha. Dark and bitter go hand-in-hand sometimes.

    I'm sorry to hear that has been your experience.
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