lucid
gus stills
Posts: 367
Long before the last shovel whispers over my bed,
with a series of hollow thuds, a gentle patter and
finally, that one last caress of grief--
Long before that I'll be adrift in lucidity.
You mock me for that disparity--you say,
"You cannot be adrift and lucid; you're
just being pretentious."
Just; and a bit more. I assure you
that one can be adrift and lucid,
and awake and lost, and sad but content.
You can be pretentious and gentle
and compassionate and angry.
Of these things I harbor no doubt;
my doubts, my friend, are much less revealing
than my sureties. Of fate I turn my head--
it's easier to believe in a plan than to
forget to move forward without a care.
And perhaps that is my plan--
this, coming in a flash of lucidity--
to be adrift in the world and know
only the certainty of that shovel's swing.
with a series of hollow thuds, a gentle patter and
finally, that one last caress of grief--
Long before that I'll be adrift in lucidity.
You mock me for that disparity--you say,
"You cannot be adrift and lucid; you're
just being pretentious."
Just; and a bit more. I assure you
that one can be adrift and lucid,
and awake and lost, and sad but content.
You can be pretentious and gentle
and compassionate and angry.
Of these things I harbor no doubt;
my doubts, my friend, are much less revealing
than my sureties. Of fate I turn my head--
it's easier to believe in a plan than to
forget to move forward without a care.
And perhaps that is my plan--
this, coming in a flash of lucidity--
to be adrift in the world and know
only the certainty of that shovel's swing.
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