Nebulous

stoneygali
stoneygali Posts: 148
edited May 2006 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
I remember those days almost clearly
Wading thru life Walkin in a haze
My nebula. Feeling so NUMB and DUMB
Withdrawn..
Gee I just think about being there and watching while my friend abused drugs. Seeing her made me feel like I was on drugs. She was a Rehabdoll.
Nothing would stop her when she really wanted it. I certainly couldn't. Iwas just an Innocent Bystander. Being ther, the witnessof an addict, made it tempting. She wasn't the only one who was sick and tried. I was lucky, knowing as much as I did, when I did. I was too chicken shit to even experiment with the stuff, being aware about the effects of a glorifed poison. With my luck my first hit would of been my last. What's the thrill in that, dying before you get to learn something important in life.
Do I really wanna die a slow suicide?
Please, with my eyes enduring the sight of my friend taunting her body was growing relentless.
I never meant to hurt you, mi diablo, mi amigo, but I've built up so much character I have an alter ego. I have to make a clean break & I have to do it quick because the pain you give me babe would make Cal Ripken call in sick!!!
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Comments

  • Mystique420
    Mystique420 Posts: 338
    stoneygali wrote:
    I remember those days almost clearly
    Wading thru life Walkin in a haze
    My nebula. Feeling so NUMB and DUMB
    Withdrawn..
    Gee I just think about being there and watching while my friend abused drugs. Seeing her made me feel like I was on drugs. She was a Rehabdoll.
    Nothing would stop her when she really wanted it. I certainly couldn't. Iwas just an Innocent Bystander. Being ther, the witnessof an addict, made it tempting. She wasn't the only one who was sick and tried. I was lucky, knowing as much as I did, when I did. I was too chicken shit to even experiment with the stuff, being aware about the effects of a glorifed poison. With my luck my first hit would of been my last. What's the thrill in that, dying before you get to learn something important in life.
    Do I really wanna die a slow suicide?
    Please, with my eyes enduring the sight of my friend taunting her body was growing relentless.

    I lost my twinsoul,... other half,... etc... but not an 'in love' thing--a bro/father/best-friend... he raised me to be the woman child i am today and he slipped away to drug abuse...in a few days it will be 2 years and I'm tryin' to hold everyone else together & all i'm doind inside is falling apart,... i dunno how i am doing it-- i just am- i think he's atop my shoulder whispering in my ears what i need to do.... this poem you wrote hit hard with me.
    "To live,.... love,..... there's a song to be sung,....
    'cause we may not be the Young Ones,..."

    --first u sow the seed-- nature grows the seed-- then we eat the seed-- ;) nah,... we smoke it!
  • hellbent1
    hellbent1 Posts: 44
    I am glad to see that it affected you...it makes me proud of myself....
    sorry that it hit That hard! I wrote this one while in high school too!
    ~stoney gali aka hellbent1
    "The money flew down and stole my cracker!"

    "Every time I go to the doctors I get a jacket, a straight one. It makes me feel special because I get to hug myself."

    I am myself like you somehow.
    I'll wait up in the dark for you to speak to me.
    How I've opened up. Release me.

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