Not Finished Yet, Need Your Help
Kovo
Posts: 255
Last night I was talking to a friend who was depressed about her ex's, so I started writting this. I didn't get it to flow right or something, it just seems wrong to me, so I'm asking for your help. Any suggestions to fix or improve this?
The rose of love, watered with tears
Begins to bloom over the years
Blood red, the pedals of your love,
Shined on by those who watch from above.
Pedals of hope, fear and loss,
Love is payed sadness the cost.
The cold your safety, the cold your gloom
Alone among the cold you bloom.
Embrace your roots, embrace your ties,
Trust in me as I trust your eyes.
And as you dwell on the cold of the past
Smile knowing its Spring at last.
The rose of love, watered with tears
Begins to bloom over the years
Blood red, the pedals of your love,
Shined on by those who watch from above.
Pedals of hope, fear and loss,
Love is payed sadness the cost.
The cold your safety, the cold your gloom
Alone among the cold you bloom.
Embrace your roots, embrace your ties,
Trust in me as I trust your eyes.
And as you dwell on the cold of the past
Smile knowing its Spring at last.
I shouldn't have to fight a battle I'll never win, just to lose those I've never had.
Post edited by Unknown User on
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EV - St. Louis 7/1/11 ** Tulsa 11/19/12