Inspired by Radiohead's "Street Spirit (Fade Out)" and

Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
Walker Evan's "Luncheon Window, New York" 1929
http://www.metmuseum.org/special/walkerevans/art/1971.646.35.R.jpg

A car camouflaged in contemporary colors
was pulled from the curb by a swatch
of superstitious workers
deployed as if from an organized handbook.

Leaving scars on the dashboard they evict the driver
from his means of escape. He runs through red lights
down a flight of steps. His car’s towed away
like a broken ship ready to sink to keep a secret.

Lunchtime wanderers can only view
this man’s life within a diner window frame.
Even less concerned with the multiple demise
the red light flashes for a moment.
Next moment.
Next moment.
Next moment.

Across the street at a public park
a jump rope slackens.
Two girls dressed in proper pink
witness this scene not revealed within the alphabet.

The parking space refills with only one dink,
and lunchtime wanderers who never step on sidewalk cracks
look beyond and to the left of descending steps.
They consider their hunger coin denominated.

A construction worker looks up. He looks straight.
He drops his hammer.

A man swallows the scene without touching his tongue for taste,
and inhales vinegar soaked french fries.
He gulps down the usual drink
ordered with a the special for an extra 50 cents.

Another man holds his sandwich like breath.
He will live as a lunchtime wanderer without means of escape.
He will teach his son to throw baseballs at the sky.
He will share stories with his granddaughter about this day’s noise.
There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • "Lunchtime wanderers can only view
    this man’s life within a diner window frame.
    Even less concerned with the multiple demise
    the red light flashes for a moment.
    Next moment.
    Next moment.
    Next moment." - I found this part, very Radioheadish!

    I like that you added a link to "Luncheon Window" as after reading your poem, I looked at the pic and could totally see your words echoing in thier thoguhts. :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    This is very multi layered and cinematic in focus. A great one, Bella.
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    Thanks to both of you! The song rides along the lower back of my throat even when my mouth is closed, and that picture is incredible. It was fun to write this.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • oh well, biblio, I love it.... it's amazing, great. !!! .
    Salut baloo
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    burtschips wrote:
    oh well, biblio, I love it.... it's amazing, great. !!! .
    Thank you! Here's the standard question for you, burtschips - where's the drawing?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • One will come along, but might take a while... yeah i could enjoy drawing something.........................
    Salut baloo
  • This is very multi layered and cinematic in focus. A great one, Bella.
    i agree :)

    ten charecters for you.
    Come on pilgrim you know he loves you..

    http://www.wishlistfoundation.org

    Oh my, they dropped the leash.



    Morgan Freeman/Clint Eastwood 08' for President!

    "Make our day"
  • here is something biblio..... a storyboard of sorts, as a visual interpretation of the song. perhaps it feels a bit cobbled together? I tried to respond to the cinematic quality of your poem by thinking of the images as stills or frames of a larger piece. It's quite abstract though and probably a bit contrived........


    The Street Spirits......

    streetspirit2.jpg

    streetspirit1.jpg

    The machine........

    MasterMachine-2.jpg

    MasterMachine-1.jpg

    Machine.jpg

    Fade out......

    Fadeout.jpg

    fadeout2.jpg

    Immersed soul......

    soul-1.jpg
    Salut baloo
  • the sky

    you wanna touch the sky

    ive got to go now

    baseball time

    and remember no trades and only one free agent the opening year
    thanks to everyone who can read what i write without having to say something mean
  • twin2twin2 Posts: 894
    Very, very good work. This one was so descriptive. My favorite line:

    " His car’s towed away
    like a broken ship ready to sink to keep a secret."
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    burtschips wrote:
    here is something biblio..... a storyboard of sorts, as a visual interpretation of the song. perhaps it feels a bit cobbled together? I tried to respond to the cinematic quality of your poem by thinking of the images as stills or frames of a larger piece. It's quite abstract though and probably a bit contrived........


    The Street Spirits......

    streetspirit2.jpg

    streetspirit1.jpg

    The machine........

    MasterMachine-2.jpg

    MasterMachine-1.jpg

    Machine.jpg

    Fade out......

    Fadeout.jpg

    fadeout2.jpg

    Immersed soul......

    soul-1.jpg
    OhMYGOD, amazing stuff, burtschips! There's a few different mediums, could you describe the different materials you used. I like the pencil/line drawings the best, especially with fade out. I think I can get some new poetry by looking at them. Wow, that's cool!
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • hi Bibliobella, the first two are ink, no 1 is a black felt tip, no 2 is with a ball point, I think. No 3 and 4 are segments from a night photo with a block colour in place of black done on the machine. No 5 is a plan of hadrians villa, not by me but a copy from a book. I love that plan, it has that helter skelter, controlled chaos thing about it to me. No 6 i do like and is in conte, no 7 is a soft hb pencil and no 8 is in acrylic paint, 3 even tones then white and black.
    Salut baloo
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y146/Burtschips/Fadeout.jpg

    After many years of waking up
    she found herself without the question, "Why?"
    A favorite hidden toy
    it was hopelessly lost.

    She would look for it in books,
    if she had any left to read.
    She looked for it in the cupboards
    behind canned goods and steel pots,
    but she found only incomplete statements.

    Covered from head to toe in accurately sewn facts
    she walked down the center of town
    in the middle of the night.
    The moonlight reflected in shop windows
    she saw as a series of moments
    on time like the town square clock.

    She saw a mother and a daughter
    holding hands as they crossed the street.
    The mother stoped abruptly, looked up
    and exclaimed, "Look at all the stars!"
    As the two pointed and counted
    the woman without "Why?"
    felt a pain in her hands stronger than blood.
    Her chin almost touched her chest and she knew
    at last no one can haggle
    over the definition of "the."
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • The poem penetrates right to the heart of the song, I think, Biblio. It's been really interesting to look at the song closely and to absorb it in this way, through interpretation. I can also strongly relate my drawing back to your poem and tie the two into the song.

    I suppose I think firstly that the picture could represent the search, the search for "why?"... a 'which way sign' to the answer of the question. When you are lost you look for a sign. For some people though, signs have no apparent meaning, and it's hard if you don't feel as though you know where you are going, you can stand and look at the sign but it means nothing to you. I think I remember the video to the song, certainly a radiohead song and to my mind it fits with this song. A man walking along the street falls to the ground and lies there paralysed, people become concerned and start asking him if he is ok, he is desperate, people want to know why, he has the answer but we don't find out what it is.... it fades out.

    'the woman without "why?"' is feeling the same pain.? The thing is that the song ends with an answer, to immerse your soul in love. Is that the message of the song, to realise that you're never really alone if you're immersed??

    Some of your descriptions are great biblio, the 'favourite toy', 'hopelessly lost', and the 'moonlight reflected in shop windows', seen as ' a series of moments' are my two favs......
    Salut baloo
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y146/Burtschips/fadeout2.jpg

    Before resurrection there is death,
    and death is not mild-mannered.
    Stand in a town square, and watch
    how the sun moves edges of simple objects
    as washes of darkness on sidewalks.

    I stood looking at the town square cross for many hours.
    I wanted to resurrect without dying first.
    I saw the splinters of this wooden object
    reflected in windows, and behind one window
    I saw a mirror.

    I saw the cross had multiplied,
    and I knew torture became common and expected.
    I kept my questions written, hidden, in a notebook.
    I stood neither resurrected nor dead,
    and threw all my change at the top of the cross,
    which fell short in quantity, distance, and patience.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Biblio.... I'm washed out now, too much driving. It's got me intrigued... I'll have to look at it closely when I can use my brain!!
    Salut baloo
  • I've got lots of thoughts bibliobella, lots between the song, the drawing and your poem. I don't know if I have a meaning, or the meaning, maybe not even my meaning, but it's made think and make connections again.

    Firstly, I was wondering do you have terraces (as in a terraced housing) in the states? Rows of houses, typically Victorian, (turn of the century when they really exploded), housing for the poorer workers in industry. They are all over the place in UK city suburbs. Identical houses joined in rows and terraced up and down hills. Pitched roofs, two storey, red brick, party wall chimneys, typically. So this is what is doing the 'bearing down' in the song. I ask because the reflected, mirrored and multiplied town square cross evokes the same sentiment. A series, repetition, multiplicity. I quite like repetition.

    Then you've got repetition in the poem, I saw, I saw, I stood, I stood,.... fade in, fade out, repetition, death, fade out, birth, fade in. Street 'spirit', fading out, I never really thought of the song just being about our death before but maybe it is. I read spirit first as in atmosphere but is it ghost?

    Then I looked back at your previous poem, the lost '"Why?"', the question, and here 'the questions', 'the strain I am under' are recorded and written in a notebook, but hidden. And if you are neither resurrected nor dead then you must be alive, but is the subject 'alive' he/she is looking for ressurection before death, so I take it he/she is alive but unfulfilled?? or lost again...? maybe. So as the cross becomes multiplied and the torture becomes common and expected... it's not going to end, it's a cycle. And throwing change at the cross.... hmmm.

    I like the sense of time again, like the framed scenes in the shopfront, this time the sun and the moving shadows recording how time passes by. See, lots of thoughts. I've got a larger drawing of the cross, I'll post it and the poem has reminded me of a little sketch of a framed sequence of openings which I think relates well.
    Salut baloo
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    Very cool, BC! I'm glad that your work, my work, and Radiohead's work got your juices flowing - sounds like it put your brain on fire, metaphorically. Please post more of the drawings. I seem to relate best to those. We have row houses, but I was really focused on the cross in the center of the town square in the second "Fade Out" drawing. Yes, the main character doesn't want the pain of death, but there is a harshness to how she sees the Now. I think that Jesus on the cross people have used to justify child abuse, and I put my little spin on that in the poem. How it is common, and yet, she is not happy with that as an option. Repeating myself is not such a great thing, it's not some poetic convetion that I'm happy about. Even though I wrote a few drafts of this, repetition is a reflection that I should have written a few more. Thanks for all the thoughts! Can't wait for the drawings. :)
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Well I'll get drawing then.... as for repetition, personally, I like repetition whether it is done subtly or sometimes very obviously, like the terraces. I don't think it detracted from your poem.
    Salut baloo
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    burtschips wrote:
    like the terraces. I don't think it detracted from your poem.
    I never thought of it that way, how repetition could be buildings, and yet each building is slightly different. That makes sense.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
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