my son

ISN

yesterday I sat and cried
everything's piling up
all the weight of everything that I have been denied
it's breaking me finally
and broken I can't live
it's taking me frightened
it's making me lost
and all the build-up, all the years of sadness
and insanity
and daily inanity
when I have so much to share with him
when will it end this treason
no certainty that there'll be some gain
saying goodbye to him every time I see him
is driving me mad
and I've had too much madness
everything I need
simple common humanity
is taken away
and all I'm left with is
tears.....to drown in
and screaming through my dreams
always abused
and mauled
but it won't happen to him
this mass
mutilation

nailz100

*hugs*...OMG I feel for you. All I can say is "You're not alone"

ISN

thanks for that....I need it to get me through until he's back with me......jus get a little sad sometimes.....he's only six months old....my first baby.....he's a funny little fella

nailz100

Babies are the cutest things...they always do what they want, when they want without thinking about how other people are going to react to it. If only we could all be like that....without self-consciousness. I envy you because you have someone who will show you unconditional love for the rest of your life...

ISN

he loves me.....he's part of me.....he's the better part of me......he's gonna be big and strong.....handsome.....happy.....and treat women right......:)

nailz100

Thats awesome ISN...

I'm sure he's a very beautiful little guy and very lucky to have you

bambi girl

ISN it's beautiful....and im sorry you feel like you're feeling, i hope you are okay, and are keeping strong.

from what you have descibed you're little fella like....he sounds like a true joy.

ISN

I see him tonight again......he's so teh cute and jus my little fella....he's gonna love me with all his heart.....and he loves me with his little heart now......he's my surprise.....I never expected him in my life.....and he loves his Dad and is surrounded by love.....he's bottled sunshine.....and so feisty.....little beasty.....he is the best boy......red cheeks.....big huge eyes.....a happy disposition......all the breath and bloom of the bee.....all that is good......reminds me of my dad.....such huge open eyes....

nailz100

"he's bottled sunshine"

Thats one of the coolest expressions I've ever heard.