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Deman

NothingbetterNothingbetter Wichita, KS Posts: 570
edited September 2005 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
Deman


I’ve tried to drown you a thousand times with this bottle,
But it’s all been in vein,
It’s fuel to keep you thriving,
Just when I think you’ve died,
there I am reviving you with my pain.
We’re partners in this life,
But you aren’t worthy of half,
You’ve controlled this too long,
I’m taking a stand,
Go ahead and laugh.
Sure, you’ve broken me down,
But you haven’t seen the best of me yet,
When I’ve lost a battle,
You’d be the first to see me fret,
Dwelling on the emptiness,
You made me feel all these years,
But that is no longer,
I won’t wear your dress.
The fool no more,
It all ends here and now,
Leave me alone, creep,
My spirit is plentiful,
I’m no longer poor.
Kansas City 6/12/03 ** Kissimmee 10/9/04 ** Atlantic City 10/1/05 ** Denver 7/2/06 ** Denver 7/3/06 ** Chicago 8/23/09 ** Chicago 8/24/09 ** Kansas City 5/3/10 ** Dallas 11/15/13 ** Oklahoma City 11/16/13 ** St. Louis 10/3/14 ** Tulsa 10/8/14 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/20/16 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/22/16 ** Oklahoma City 9/20/22 ** Ft. Worth 9/15/23

EV - St. Louis 7/1/11 ** Tulsa 11/19/12
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • KovoKovo Posts: 255
    I've read it 3 times now, I liked it the first time, and everytime it gets better. Nothing like a fresh start.
    I shouldn't have to fight a battle I'll never win, just to lose those I've never had.
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    if you're the male voice, I didn't like it.....too often we see men abandoning their partners for some excuse or other......I don't believe it......I don't believe you
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • NothingbetterNothingbetter Wichita, KS Posts: 570
    Kovo - thanks!

    ISN - Do you have multiple personalities or something? Lately you've been on a weird run ;) Look deeper into the title, and the poem. It has nothing to do with a partner in terms of a romantic relationship.

    Here's a hint - Notice the play on words in the title :)
    Kansas City 6/12/03 ** Kissimmee 10/9/04 ** Atlantic City 10/1/05 ** Denver 7/2/06 ** Denver 7/3/06 ** Chicago 8/23/09 ** Chicago 8/24/09 ** Kansas City 5/3/10 ** Dallas 11/15/13 ** Oklahoma City 11/16/13 ** St. Louis 10/3/14 ** Tulsa 10/8/14 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/20/16 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/22/16 ** Oklahoma City 9/20/22 ** Ft. Worth 9/15/23

    EV - St. Louis 7/1/11 ** Tulsa 11/19/12
  • depopulationINCdepopulationINC Posts: 2,074
    I get the feeling ISN was having a bad day yesterday. I like it. The battle within.
    The only thing I enjoy is having no feelings....being numb rocks!

    And I won't make the same mistakes
    (Because I know)
    Because I know how much time that wastes
    (And function)
    Function is the key
  • NothingbetterNothingbetter Wichita, KS Posts: 570
    Thanks, depop! :)
    Kansas City 6/12/03 ** Kissimmee 10/9/04 ** Atlantic City 10/1/05 ** Denver 7/2/06 ** Denver 7/3/06 ** Chicago 8/23/09 ** Chicago 8/24/09 ** Kansas City 5/3/10 ** Dallas 11/15/13 ** Oklahoma City 11/16/13 ** St. Louis 10/3/14 ** Tulsa 10/8/14 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/20/16 ** Chicago - Wrigley Field 8/22/16 ** Oklahoma City 9/20/22 ** Ft. Worth 9/15/23

    EV - St. Louis 7/1/11 ** Tulsa 11/19/12
  • twin2twin2 Posts: 894
    I like it. I thought it was about alcoholism and his fight with trying to give it up. That was just my take on it. Good work.
  • AliAli Posts: 2,621
    Very nice comparison Nothing better, to a fight that can be won and prevailed by good.

    :);)
    A whisper and a thrill
    A whisper and a chill
    adv2005

    "Why do I bother?"
    The 11th Commandment.
    "Whatever"

    PETITION TO STOP THE BAN OF SMOKING IN BARS IN THE UNITED STATES....Anyone?
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