Lost and Found (fatherhood poems)

jboelhowjboelhow Posts: 170
Lost: Fatherhood part I

I’m lost
in a routine
that has me first to awake
last to fall a sleep
first to cook
last to eat

a routine
that has me first to clean up
last to relax
first to spend money
last to actually purchase anything

I’m lost
in the daily occurrences
of diaper changes
spilt milk
stubbing toes on toys
and the defiance of a 3-year-old

I’ve lost
my name
I’m now some odd
Mr. – Dad – Hun – Uncle combination
with the popular nickname
“Dadddddyyyyy”
when things go wrong

I’ve lost myself
at critical times
when you broke your arm
as I watched you play
only inches away from my hands

I’ve lost myself
in dark moments
when you stared me down
in the living room
I became so mad
that I had to breakdown
in the kitchen

I’ve lost my way
between when to stand strong
and when to give in
what is the line between
spoiled and loved

Fatherhood is an ever-changing maze
and I am lost

Found: Fatherhood part II

I’m found
in a routine
that has me first to read a story
last to tuck you in
first to push you in the swing
last to catch you on the slide

a routine
that has me first to add bubbles to the bath
last one to stay dry
first one you hug hello
last on to let go for goodbye

I’m found
in the daily occurrences
of playing train
running through the house
answering “why” questions
and the love of a 3-year-old

I’ve found
my name
I am simply
“Father”
with the popular nickname
“Daddddyyyy”
when things go right

I’ve found myself
at minor times
when you kindly tell the drive-thru worker
“Thank you!”
without a prompt from me

I’ve found myself
in bright moments
when you stared at me
in the living room
pausing from playing to say “Luv you dad”
I had to breakdown
in the kitchen

I’ve found my way
when to stand strong
and when to give in
the line is easy to find
it is me

Fatherhood is an ever-changing maze
And I am lost
but I’ll use my children’s life
to find my way
Live the life you dream

"Cause I can't wait to figure out what's wrong with me
So I can say this is the way I use to be" -- John Mayer
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • KwyjiboKwyjibo Posts: 662
    ""he held his breath to hold your hand
    to walk the stairsteps in pairs
    climbing up a slippery slope
    i'm in love, love i hope
    don't go home angelina
    stay with me, hanging around in the lost and found
    kissed you quick feeling weird
    lonely leeved and disappeared
    this is such a simple place
    passing time can't erase
    don't go home angelina
    paint tomorrow blue
    day breaks and every morning when he wakes he thinks of you
    i'm alone, that's okay, i don't mind
    most of the time
    i don't feel afraid to die
    she was here passing by
    don't go home angelina
    stay with me, hanging around in the lost and found
    stay with me, hanging around in the lost and found
    ""
    The most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway, is that its you, and that you're standing in the doorway.

    I write down good reasons to freeze to death in my spiral ring notebook. But in the long tresses of your hair--I am a babbling brook.
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    jboelhow......I'm found and lost too.......I so am a mother....I'm such a mother.....(fukker).....nah....I'm so Mom.....Mummy....let me rub your tummy.....eat your feet......bubs....in the tub.....bubs.....blow bubbles bubs.....I love you bubs......bubbaroony.....my little Torin....(big for a little guy)
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
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