first timer

CBBootCBBoot Posts: 28
edited April 2004 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
Never posted here, actually i've never been in here (i usually hangout on the porch). After reading some things i will be here a lot.

You left a man in sacrifice, you left him in the ground
It’s seven hundred forty days that you are not around
We traveled west out to the sea; we sat there on the pier
You took me up this simple man when I had volunteered
For what I could have done for you, for all that I have known
That when you left I left you too but never could move on
………………………………………………………………
Now there is no sun that will burn for me, I was yours
Green book and silver ring that I hold but now you’re gone
……………………………………………………………..
The key I hold for life that’s you, unlock what’s in me now
Green and gray and yellow too the chambers have filled somehow
There is a special place out there and Hunter bares its name
For dedication I thank him he can’t know what he gave
The field that sits across from you, the sand that lies out back
It’s in between I built a life that I never should have had
………………………………………………………………
And now there is no sun it’s the darkness I’m afraid of
There is light for the ones who feel, but I’m not him, you’re in love
……………………………………………………………….
A message in the clearing now it floats in from before
It’s in your soul, a better place; it’s beautiful colors
A world that raised the one that use to call me by my name
You are the sun, you are the one, they’ll never be again……
i don't need drugs to make my life tragic.....ev
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • KwyjiboKwyjibo Posts: 662
    a lot of the cadence and stuff around here are pretty choppy (especially mine)

    the time was perfect, good job
    The most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway, is that its you, and that you're standing in the doorway.

    I write down good reasons to freeze to death in my spiral ring notebook. But in the long tresses of your hair--I am a babbling brook.
  • CBBootCBBoot Posts: 28
    Originally posted by Kwyjibo
    the time was perfect, good job

    thank you very much you are the second person to ever read any of my original stuff and the first to compliment so for that i am forever grateful.
    i don't need drugs to make my life tragic.....ev
  • BuruBuru Posts: 8,473
    that was very good!!
    full of yearning and beautifully written
    y la banda de Guille... cuando toca?
  • even flow?even flow? Posts: 8,066
    Originally posted by CBBoot
    Never posted here, actually i've never been in here (i usually hangout on the porch). After reading some things i will be here a lot.

    You left a man in sacrifice, you left him in the ground
    It’s seven hundred forty days that you are not around
    We traveled west out to the sea; we sat there on the pier
    You took me up this simple man when I had volunteered
    For what I could have done for you, for all that I have known
    That when you left I left you too but never could move on
    ………………………………………………………………
    Now there is no sun that will burn for me, I was yours
    Green book and silver ring that I hold but now you’re gone
    ……………………………………………………………..
    The key I hold for life that’s you, unlock what’s in me now
    Green and gray and yellow too the chambers have filled somehow
    There is a special place out there and Hunter bares its name
    For dedication I thank him he can’t know what he gave
    The field that sits across from you, the sand that lies out back
    It’s in between I built a life that I never should have had
    ………………………………………………………………
    And now there is no sun it’s the darkness I’m afraid of
    There is light for the ones who feel, but I’m not him, you’re in love
    ……………………………………………………………….
    A message in the clearing now it floats in from before
    It’s in your soul, a better place; it’s beautiful colors
    A world that raised the one that use to call me by my name
    You are the sun, you are the one, they’ll never be again……

    Love inspires so much in the Pit. I enjoyed this.
    You've changed your place in this world!
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