Just A Poem To share.....

ForeverAJammer

nothing

CranMalReign

I think it's pretty cool, though I do think the "see everything though have no sight" is a sorta cliche'd description. No offense. I'm guilty of cliche myself.

Stolen Pencil420

It reminds me of the isolation that I feel from time to time. It's when I learn that we're (most of the people from THE board) not like the rest of the ignorant slobs out there. We're smarter, and better than that, yet they're still the majority, so we reluctantly continue to live a life of ignorance; Involuntarily condescending to these rednecks. Only in my dreams and my poetry can I express who I really am.

I really liked your poem.

ForeverAJammer

thank you.... that reply really helped me i thought it sucked but i figured id let you guys see:)Love ya!

ForeverAJammer

I think ure right about the cliche...any suggestions?

Stolen Pencil420

just "elaborate" on what you're trying to say. Try picking someone or something that you can identify with, and compare it with your emotions.

A HitchHiker Poet

I love it so much, I wish I could buy you a bottle of wine

Exodus

i love the line about "the words you never say"
that was nice

seekit

i love the way you end it especially..............
very nice..........

ForeverAJammer

i wanted to thank everyone who replied, thanks so much...u guys are amazing.......

ForeverAJammer

did a little reworking

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by A HitchHiker Poet
I love it so much, I wish I could buy you a bottle of wine

aww thank you so much

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by Exodus
i love the line about "the words you never say"
that was nice

thanks a mil:)

Outshyned

Ooooh i love it. I think i want to comment/interpret specifically..
This will be just what i gleaned from it.. I may be way off,, but i think that is also a part of art appreciation...... Seeing what something makes us feel. Your poem will be in quotes.

"Originally posted by ForeverAJammer
My finger tips touched the sky that night
i was alone, so glad i was never right
i saw everything...away from the light"

This part clearly speaks of independent thinking to me..
It sounds like a fearlessness toward peering out of ones own lense instead of always choosing to see through popular (and sometimes idiotic) opinion....... All the while still attempting to take in all information (even the things many times completely ignored) and react based upon that. Big picture stuff is what i feel from this line

"it was my day...
it was my way...
but it will linger on forever like the words you never say"

This part reminds me of denial and the things/truths some somehow choose to shut out, or never get to view based upon groupthink mindfuck/cover-up/denial or whatever. Also implies secrets.......
"The words you never say"

"I felt your wind
for the very first time
this is a dream, this is an outline
of i wish..in my mind"

For me this speaks to a very personal interpretation/perception of reality.. Also seems to point to some new realisation of someone or something either newly discovered or acknowledged.

"lemme know what you guys think:)"

That's what i think

Beautiful work of words there,, thanks for posting it!

Buru

liked your poem
it is a bit cliché in parts but has a great ending (last 2 lines specially)

stickboy

:D:D:D
you already know how I feel!

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by Outshyned
Ooooh i love it. I think i want to comment/interpret specifically..
This will be just what i gleaned from it.. I may be way off,, but i think that is also a part of art appreciation...... Seeing what something makes us feel. Your poem will be in quotes.



That's what i think

Beautiful work of words there,, thanks for posting it!

wow thanks so much for ure post..i have never seen anyone analysis one of my poems before..thanks so much..really appreciated that:)

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by ForeverAJammer


finger tips , they touched the sky that night
i completely alone....so this is why i was never right
i saw u for the very first time...nothing like the faded spotlight


here i am...this is today
lingers on like the word you'll never say

i felt your song
for the very first time
this is a dream of a wish
in my mind.....




lemme know what you guys think:)

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by Buru
liked your poem
it is a bit cliché in parts but has a great ending (last 2 lines specially)

thanks:) yeah i have a bad habit of just spilling whatever comes out of me down, even if it stinks lol

ForeverAJammer

thanks for all the comments....reworked again to get my point across a little more...much love everybody:)

stickboy

Originally posted by ForeverAJammer
thanks:) yeah i have a bad habit of just spilling whatever comes out of me down, even if it stinks lol

I wish you were here right now to spill out some more, and it does NOT stink!

PrettyNoose

very nice. the line that stuck with me was "i felt your song"
nonplussing, yet interpretive...

ForeverAJammer

Originally posted by PrettyNoose
very nice. the line that stuck with me was "i felt your song"
nonplussing, yet interpretive...