i find this comforting
Yellow
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LOVE NEEDS A PLACE TO REST
Perhaps the one thing young people yearn to know, more than any other, is how can they tell when they are "really" in love. It is so easy to see the counterfeits when one looks back later, and so difficult to dicriminate when the blood is running high and the moon is full.
Why do so many persons seem to pick disappointing lovers and inadequate mates, so deliberately, so stubbornly, so obviously doomed to failure? It is largely, I think because the romance, like liquor, feeds on it's own delusion: the more we consume, the more intoxicated and distorted our judgement becomes.
One of the best and truest tests of a real affinity - though one not congenial to the youthful passions - may have been provided by St Bernard of the Clairaux, when he said,"We find rest in those we love, and we provide a resting place in ourselves for those who love us."
When the infatuation has runs it's course, as it always does, the feeling that remains must include repose at it's core; a quality much neglected and overlooked in most romantic literature and lore. If a relationship requires constant stimulation - spats and tears and reconciliations - then it is doubtful that when the fever subsides there will be enough contentment simply to be with each other.
Marriage, of course, does not change people; it merely unmasks them. It strips off the strangeness, the glamour, the appearance of strength, the fascination of novelty, and the treacherous sense of uniqueness that every couple feels at first.
Faced then with the thousand annoyances and perplexities of everyday connubiality, two persons have to rest easily within each other, or the abrasions of family life will begin to wear away the relationship, leaving little but wistfulness and puzzlement and eventually, resentment that the reality is nothing like the romance.
A resting place is what we need as we grow older. A place not to gaze at each other in mutual fascination, but to look out at the world together from much the same angle of vision. A harbor, a shelter, a refuge, a sourse of nourishment and support. This is not what creates a marriage, but it is what sustains it.
Two persons must make a space for themsleves and a clearing around them, for retreat as much as sociability. Conjugal love is a resting place or an empty form. But by the time we learn the lesson, it is often too late.
-Sydney J. Harris
don't you think you outta rest?
don't you think you outta lay your head down
you don't think there's time to stop
there's time enough for you to lay your head down
tonight
it's no crime
Perhaps the one thing young people yearn to know, more than any other, is how can they tell when they are "really" in love. It is so easy to see the counterfeits when one looks back later, and so difficult to dicriminate when the blood is running high and the moon is full.
Why do so many persons seem to pick disappointing lovers and inadequate mates, so deliberately, so stubbornly, so obviously doomed to failure? It is largely, I think because the romance, like liquor, feeds on it's own delusion: the more we consume, the more intoxicated and distorted our judgement becomes.
One of the best and truest tests of a real affinity - though one not congenial to the youthful passions - may have been provided by St Bernard of the Clairaux, when he said,"We find rest in those we love, and we provide a resting place in ourselves for those who love us."
When the infatuation has runs it's course, as it always does, the feeling that remains must include repose at it's core; a quality much neglected and overlooked in most romantic literature and lore. If a relationship requires constant stimulation - spats and tears and reconciliations - then it is doubtful that when the fever subsides there will be enough contentment simply to be with each other.
Marriage, of course, does not change people; it merely unmasks them. It strips off the strangeness, the glamour, the appearance of strength, the fascination of novelty, and the treacherous sense of uniqueness that every couple feels at first.
Faced then with the thousand annoyances and perplexities of everyday connubiality, two persons have to rest easily within each other, or the abrasions of family life will begin to wear away the relationship, leaving little but wistfulness and puzzlement and eventually, resentment that the reality is nothing like the romance.
A resting place is what we need as we grow older. A place not to gaze at each other in mutual fascination, but to look out at the world together from much the same angle of vision. A harbor, a shelter, a refuge, a sourse of nourishment and support. This is not what creates a marriage, but it is what sustains it.
Two persons must make a space for themsleves and a clearing around them, for retreat as much as sociability. Conjugal love is a resting place or an empty form. But by the time we learn the lesson, it is often too late.
-Sydney J. Harris
don't you think you outta rest?
don't you think you outta lay your head down
you don't think there's time to stop
there's time enough for you to lay your head down
tonight
it's no crime
It's all yellow.
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we all need to rest.
Jason
Faced then with the thousand annoyances and perplexities of everyday connubiality, two persons have to rest easily within each other, or the abrasions of family life will begin to wear away the relationship, leaving little but wistfulness and puzzlement and eventually, resentment that the reality is nothing like the romance.
A resting place is what we need as we grow older. A place not to gaze at each other in mutual fascination, but to look out at the world together from much the same angle of vision. A harbor, a shelter, a refuge, a sourse of nourishment and support. This is not what creates a marriage, but it is what sustains it.
So true, and it is a comforting thought.
It would be more comforting if I still had that person, but after 8 years that person turned out to be a liar and adulterer....
oh well, I guess he never was 'that' person to begin with.
Hope springs eternal, they say. And it is true that people need people...
apologies for the ramble....again, thanks for the read.
Savannah
and indeed, people DO need people
alot of people would refute that, consciously, thereby subconsciouslly starving themselves of fufilment from any endeavor