Selwyn Sedgeley Roper (an impro)

FinsburyParkCarrots

Selwyn Sedgely Roper, doper, reads the de Quincey that pater's friend left in the loo
It's 1842
Selwyn's sent-down collegian friend, Henry Rawsome-End
Stayed in St Helena to screen-ah Napoleon in his last throes
Likes to powder his nose
They meet in a tavern in Southwark
Quaffing the mead and chewing the animal-fat broadsheets six weeks old
Debating whether adventure and commercial travelling's the thing to do for the upper echelons
When speculations have run dry
Selwyn has a supplier
in a den in Bermondsey
He can construct an East where he is
henry reckons to join the army was a fine thing for a fop back in the twenties
But he's missed the mystic ship
And the old class is changing
Hunter and Charles made some silly investments
Time to Check Out the Company
But Selwyn's got his supplier
And Bea in lodgings agreeable

Slide down or slide out?
What would you do
in 1842?

FinsburyParkCarrots

Aye And verilie, as instructed by my moste High Reverende Archibalde G'Nadde, I ENTERED yon theatre situated in Her Royal Highness's South Banke in ordere to reporte at a so callede "GIGGE" the debauchede carnivalle entertainmente of the new phenomenonne of "ROCKE". Presente in this sweatte fuelled venue, I witnessed all artes appertaining to the Disgracefulle ARTE of grunge musicke; in the midstes of a hoarde of raucouse groundlinges, grouped as a "pitte" of uncoothe youthes pracktisinge ye diabolickal arte of MOSHINGE, was a licentious manne MOSHINGE alsoe with themme, passinge arounde the deville's own brewe of redde wine. His name was EDWARDE of VEDDERE: His eyes rolled arounde inn his SKULLE like thatte of a manne possessed by the fervoure of Dark Artes...he sangge loudlie "It's evolutione, babeye" overre and overre as ye massed hoardes danced their ayrses offe orgiastically into ecstaticicke oblivione. I shalle be filinge my reporte to my municipalle authorities to suppresse the decadente culte of Pearle Jamme along with Mr Shakespeare's Globe theatre, the perpetuatione of brothelles, bawdie houses and bear-baitinge tentes all uppe and downe this districte
in the name of Our Blessed sovereigne
dated thisse 21st July 1598 Anno Domini.

EvilToasterElf

If I hadn't spend 4 months in London that might have been completely lost on me, but pretty damn impressive for an improv, and I'm sure as I keep reading it some memories of my time there will come back to me - actually if you've got any poems set in London post em up - I need to live vicariously through someone who's there - You have to squint to find beauty where I go to school

FinsburyParkCarrots

Well....I'll improvise a bit more! The pc was down for three days and there are words banging their little fists inside my skull trying to get out and jump down into the white box of the post reply page to spin back to yez......

See what I can do.....

Yellow

spot on!

FinsburyParkCarrots

Professor Rightpole sneezed sloshily as Erasmus the twenty-one year old blind tabby whacked with its fat tail - like a possessed insulation rug - his cornflakes off the table and into his lap, the flying milk rising from his eyes like a slow motion Koyanisquatsi sequence; the bowl spun three times centrifugally in the air holding the cereal in the bowl till the upside down vessel finally yielded its amber splodge onto his freshly pressed beige trousers, the edge of the bowl thunking against his right knee and bouncing off to shout its stentorious clatter as it hit the wooden brick floor of his chambers. Rightpole contemplated the viscous dollop covering his lap appreciatively , smiling contendedly as he cast his mind back to that argument about systems he'd had with the Harvard chap at that conference back in '78 and picking individual flakes of goo from his trousers masticating them blissfully in the realisation that the day was sure to present new revelations and insights into the mechanics of the universe due to the acuteness of his vision today.
Thus, at sixty four, Hubert Jeremiah Rightpole ventured into the world of versifying, giving up his gown for a pc to type in his insights to the PJ message pit.....

FinsburyParkCarrots

Four thousand
seven hundred
and sixty nine mile
As de crow fly

Crow take de short route
Don't go sight seein' de aviashunn paths
Dey fulla planes
Go over de quick way de nice north wind blow
straight left fella down a bit den
put yer sweater I knitted ya on for da cold
if it don't wear ya down in flyin
an here
take dis flask an sandwiches
an a stash a worms
in ya napsack, fella
plenty o goodness yis yis
no need to refuel on Rockall
fly fly fly

an take dis love letter
to the pretty girl who live near the space needle
golden hair bluest eyes
yeh her
de real real pretty one
un be polite
knock on her door headbowed not like the telegraph buzzard
no need ta craw for pay tips
she good an kind an lovin to all creatures
she da bliss weaver
she'll take ya in
an feed ya
an make ya strong
for yi trouble
cos ya brought us together
an when ya fly again
yill like ta stay in dose longitudes latitudes
not absurd at all
not with all dat love
as de centre of de world
de centre of mah happy happy world
dat beautiful girl.

FinsburyParkCarrots

Jeeze dat feckin' tyre's flat feel it bumpin' along the road yed think the council would come out one feckin' day a month an' spray the grass that's growin' in de middle of de road it's a hard enough thing tryin' te cycle uphill in de feckin' wind comin' from the sea after a night on the stout but to put up in dis glorious time of Europe an grants an handouts to farmers like Francis Lenaghan he got three grand to whitewash his cabin for the tourists an stick a few gnomes on the wall till he was told te take em down they weren't bucolic enough like the Quiet Man a tourist's idea of the wild sports of the west feck 'em anyway yes ye'd think the communications revolution would tell these feckers to come out an' spray de grass that's overgrowin' an' them brambles is comin' out into the path nearly takin' the cap off me wonder if I can steer this thing one handed while I go to my fob for the flask startin' to get the hangover comin' on that'll be today fecked headache cannant move at all layin' in bed an' cursin' puttin' me head on the cold wall as I lay there hopin' for the dark again when the pain goes better to stay stocious ah I can't steer this feckin' thing an' get the flask at the same time I'm not an octopus there was a whale down on the strand Father Tony said at mass the other day it had gone red on the rocks I thought he was interestin' for once but then he started saying starfish grow their arms back again after ye cut them off an he was sayin' the love of God's like that an' I got an attack of the fits laughin' in there Mrs Deane from the post office turnin' around in the pew an lookin' at me disgusted makin' me laugh worse I kept thinking if I cut his balls off would they grow back for the love of God ye never know it'd be the parish miracle of Father Tony's Blessed testacles an' then there would be parish missions and TV cameras an revenue generated an' enough money te pay for the feckin' roads ah feck there's a feckin' stone ahhhhhhhhhh.......

FinsburyParkCarrots

Performed by the renowned Bohemian master-illusionist and all-conqueror of the dematerialisational arts Janus Lovskovski Esquire, in Trafalgar Square, Tuesday, as noted by our London Reporter Henry Slough:












STOP PRESS

REPORTER MYSTERIOUSLY VANISHES

Being Enlightened

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
Four thousand
seven hundred
and sixty nine mile
As de crow fly

Crow take de short route
Don't go sight seein' de aviashunn paths
Dey fulla planes
Go over de quick way de nice north wind blow
straight left fella down a bit den
put yer sweater I knitted ya on for da cold
if it don't wear ya down in flyin
an here
take dis flask an sandwiches
an a stash a worms
in ya napsack, fella
plenty o goodness yis yis
no need to refuel on Rockall
fly fly fly

an take dis love letter
to the pretty girl who live near the space needle
golden hair bluest eyes
yeh her
de real real pretty one
un be polite
knock on her door headbowed not like the telegraph buzzard
no need ta craw for pay tips
she good an kind an lovin to all creatures
she da bliss weaver
she'll take ya in
an feed ya
an make ya strong
for yi trouble
cos ya brought us together
an when ya fly again
yill like ta stay in dose longitudes latitudes
not absurd at all
not with all dat love
as de centre of de world
de centre of mah happy happy world
dat beautiful girl.

It's all good there, Finsy and I especially liked "Percival Scrote", smiles and chuckles for that one, but the one quoted above is mon favorite!!!! Sweet!

FinsburyParkCarrots

It's for the Board's blue eyed bliss weaver...my golden day glow girl (no prizes for guessing who...the quotation below kinda gives it away)

anOmis

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
Four thousand
seven hundred
and sixty nine mile
As de crow fly

Crow take de short route
Don't go sight seein' de aviashunn paths
Dey fulla planes
Go over de quick way de nice north wind blow
straight left fella down a bit den
put yer sweater I knitted ya on for da cold
if it don't wear ya down in flyin
an here
take dis flask an sandwiches
an a stash a worms
in ya napsack, fella
plenty o goodness yis yis
no need to refuel on Rockall
fly fly fly

an take dis love letter
to the pretty girl who live near the space needle
golden hair bluest eyes
yeh her
de real real pretty one
un be polite
knock on her door headbowed not like the telegraph buzzard
no need ta craw for pay tips
she good an kind an lovin to all creatures
she da bliss weaver
she'll take ya in
an feed ya
an make ya strong
for yi trouble
cos ya brought us together
an when ya fly again
yill like ta stay in dose longitudes latitudes
not absurd at all
not with all dat love
as de centre of de world
de centre of mah happy happy world
dat beautiful girl.

FinsburyParkCarrots

I was talking in the pub last night to the barperson who'd just had an operation to remove some cells that were growing inside her torso. Do you know what was removed? I kid you not: A great ball of hair and three teeth! Hair and teeth cells growing inside you...I've gone for nearly thirty two years not knowing that can happen to a person... one might grow a little wookie who rests in the hollow of your ribcage biding his time using your lungs as a punchbag, tapping the belly with his fingernail for some pirate food, and yanking at your heart at random just for something to do. But you've got responsibilities to your wookie...you can't mistreat him although you will have to die to set him free....is this what people call a soul?

Being Enlightened

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
I was talking in the pub last night to the barperson who'd just had an operation to remove some cells that were growing inside her torso. Do you know what was removed? I kid you not: A great ball of hair and three teeth! Hair and teeth cells growing inside you...I've gone for nearly thirty two years not knowing that can happen to a person... one might grow a little wookie who rests in the hollow of your ribcage biding his time using your lungs as a punchbag, tapping the belly with his fingernail for some pirate food, and yanking at your heart at random just for something to do. But you've got responsibilities to your wookie...you can't mistreat him although you will have to try to set him free....is this what people call a soul?

Read "The Dark Half" by Stephen King.

FinsburyParkCarrots

Gilbertine nuzzled on a half glass of dark ale watching the wookies scratch themselves at the bar....

"Jeeze....and you'd never guess what they found in me when they cut me open....skin.....a real live human......"

"Shit, that's gross....."

Gilbertine scratched her beard and shook her head: why did she come here when the regulars were so grotesque?

FinsburyParkCarrots

Hey, Yella's up! Someone make her a cuppa!

Being Enlightened

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
Gilbertine nuzzled on a half glass of dark ale watching the wookies scratch themselves at the bar....

"Jeeze....and you'd never guess what they found in me when they cut me open....skin.....a real live human......"

"Shit, that's gross....."

Gilbertine scratched her beard and shook her head: why did she come her when the regulars were so grotesque?

LOL!

I wonder if there was any lice in dat dare beard a hers?

Dessert, anyone?

FinsburyParkCarrots

Lucy emails Geoff in admin and asks Geoff if it's true he's fallen in e-love with Samantha in sales and Geoff says yes but Lucy (who used to go out with Geoff fifteen years ago) asks him how it's possible he's fallen in love with Samantha when she's on another floor and Geoff tells Lucy that there's a connection and Lucy says what connection how do you know there's a chemistry and Geoff says I know I know and Lucy starts to make comments mocking his e-love but it's still all on email all on email all on email

Time to get up and walk and meet your love

Yellow

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
Four thousand
seven hundred
and sixty nine mile
As de crow fly

Crow take de short route
Don't go sight seein' de aviashunn paths
Dey fulla planes
Go over de quick way de nice north wind blow
straight left fella down a bit den
put yer sweater I knitted ya on for da cold
if it don't wear ya down in flyin
an here
take dis flask an sandwiches
an a stash a worms
in ya napsack, fella
plenty o goodness yis yis
no need to refuel on Rockall
fly fly fly

an take dis love letter
to the pretty girl who live near the space needle
golden hair bluest eyes
yeh her
de real real pretty one
un be polite
knock on her door headbowed not like the telegraph buzzard
no need ta craw for pay tips
she good an kind an lovin to all creatures
she da bliss weaver
she'll take ya in
an feed ya
an make ya strong
for yi trouble
cos ya brought us together
an when ya fly again
yill like ta stay in dose longitudes latitudes
not absurd at all
not with all dat love
as de centre of de world
de centre of mah happy happy world
dat beautiful girl.

oh sigh... dyao da lucky grl

FinsburyParkCarrots

How do crystals come?
A Pyrite cube? An octahedron? Diamond crystal?
How, such symmetries?
Our medium, they say is flatness,
Flatness stacks atoms to design:
"Arab mathematics knew this fact":
But here, see, closer:
flatness is a vista
Curving interminably.

Universes inside universes
Shine constellations of oeiliads and lovers' breaths
within each fractal gleam of a gem in a hand
passing waves to eye and ear and body.

And in the form of a Raphael,
Madonna and child are perfect grace:
line indissoluble, colour suggesting atoms of infinite shape,
Shaping space itself into order unbounded.

And in the celestial there is yearning
for rebirth in relocation, not fixing of absolutes:
the rebirth of stars and satellites,
the pulling of new gravities,
the changing of orbits.
The pull of love from flatness to curves:
Love as repatterning atoms.

FinsburyParkCarrots

Peas bleed
they do indeed
I must conceed
I check my greed
I feel the need
to change my creed
Eat meat insteeeed

Peas bleed.

FinsburyParkCarrots

A straw Kiss Me Quick hat from Great Yarmouth that splintered on one wearing
Power cuts during Secret Squirrel or in the till queue at the Beehive
Fab ice lollies that looked like rockets
Tom Baker
Ann Ward's dog shiteing all over the driveway
The split in my Hulk mask that used to get caught up with the elastic around my head
rolling around in a plastic barrel in the school woods
Being scared of going down the plughole in the bath when my brother played Time by Pink Floyd in the other room
Riding my tricycle with an empty potty on my head in the yard, round and round an orange pip thinking it was an acorn and trying to magic it into an oak tree



Being four was great

FinsburyParkCarrots

soulfunkaliciousgroovemeisterrockinstompinindhousebydasuper
freewayflaresflappingroovewaycherishyauuuhhhhlovedaddyyoyoyoyo

Uhhhhbabyherecomedeexpresswaytoyodestiny

FinsburyParkCarrots

where'd that leg come from from over me shoulder oh it's mine wooah falling forward not too fast look out the side fastfast brown and green and leaves sky leaves sky leaves crackles of sycamores trees with dutch elm disease marked for cutting fastfastfasttsaftsaf whooooooahhhh out of control that div Roberto giving it a push it'll hit something a tree no no I'll bail out the side one two three

yaaaaaaaaaahhhhh


diizzzzzzzy

upside down shit look at my cords my knees my hands grazed where's Roberto
running away

yeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgh

roll the barrel after him

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgh

dyaogirl

Originally posted by Yellow
oh sigh... dyao da lucky grl

Oh! how she agrees!

(.....As her heart smiles and she hums dat tune "Luckiest girl in the world")

Yellow

hey... if you happen to see the most beautiful girl in the



oops! wrong song blues, weeping like a willow...





my jukebox is set to 1978 or something, i swear...


oh, and finsbury? very very funny stuff up there... good god man... a tooth?? in her stomach??? and HAIR???? eeeeeeek!

dyaogirl

Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
Well....I'll improvise a bit more! The pc was down for three days and there are words banging their little fists inside my skull trying to get out and jump down into the white box of the post reply page to spin back to yez......

See what I can do.....

Let us make sure that those little fists inside your skull don't start growing..."Hair and teeth cells".... most unpleasant

FinsburyParkCarrots

Originally posted by dyaogirl
Let us make sure that those little fists inside your skull don't start growing..."Hair and teeth cells".... most unpleasant

No, all that's growing in me is dyaogirl's love.....

Yellow

a most welcomed thing

FinsburyParkCarrots

The boots are in the back of the van
and the shovel and the drag
and the gloves
and the saw
now I'm ready
go down the bank back to front
edge in the water
mind the wasps
now start digging the cress out
on the fork
hear the water sploshing out of the forkful
now throw it up get a good swing
hup
fire it up ten feet
mind the path above
that's it, keep digging


The clues are in the back of the book
and the index and the sources
and my notes
now I'm ready
go through with a fine comb and a highlighter pen
mind to dot i's and cross t's
on the up
Feel the answers starting to come now
now write them down get a good momentum
yup
fire it out ten thousand words
reach the path above
that's it, keep studying


My love is in the crux of my heart
in each systole and dialstole
and in my breath
oh I'm ready
go through my schedule working out the practicalities
omitting no considerations
on the rise
Know my future's almost at hand now
Yes
Move five thousand little miles
To kiss the grail of love
This is real! I'm dancing!

Yellow

you so got da flow