Snapshot of a Mayo bar

FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Posts: 12,223
Joe John Fat, broadhanded, yellow fingered
sits under the stream of windowlight slicing the smoke
and flying particles of dust in Keane's bar this afternoon.
He's on the black plastic couch with its rips and burns
and yellow sponge hanging over in fists,
and he's hunched forward
in a crumpled grey suit
and opennecked blue shirt,
staring at brown lino and butts
and muttering into his stout glass, tipping to him.
He looks up and eyes the bar,
Mary Conway behind it, singing the Coolin,
rinsing glasses, moving abstractedly,
dumpy to him, but still fine: he hawks and spits silently
into a dry palm.
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • Wide glass of Powers gets hit off the round table by a jerseyed elbow
    and that's our Petey
    Petey's singing Green Green Grass of Home
    it smashes and splashes on the tiles, splashing into the gutters between each square
    it's worth it to hear the sound hit the window
    making you look out to Achill
    blue and green and a bit more blue
  • BuruBuru Posts: 8,473
    that's a pretty good/accurate picture you portrayed
    I can almost smell the liquor and I do believe I know the characters, they are quite universal
    y la banda de Guille... cuando toca?
  • Thanks, Buru. :)

    I might add to this thread occasionally. And if anyone else would like to contribute with barroom snapshots in words, from around the world, please do!
  • BuruBuru Posts: 8,473
    Tom Waits could add to this thread with no problem
    and Bukowski...
    :D
    Originally posted by FinsburyParkCarrots
    Thanks, Buru. :)

    I might add to this thread occasionally. And if anyone else would like to contribute with barroom snapshots in words, from around the world, please do!
    y la banda de Guille... cuando toca?
  • Farmers' dole day and Keane's is open by nine
    and Hughie and Seamus have been up early
    for the post office in the pub; they walked from up the hill road
    starting off at seven, at one point stopping at the crest
    and picking blackberries from the hedge,
    the spikey taste overlaying last night's coating of brandy
    and making their stomachs shiver.
    With their packets of Euros they're in the bar now,
    both with a Special: Guinness and Smithwick's top
    matched by a double Paddy's in a wide glass
    Elbows on the formica bar
    Heads down
    Looking at English papers brought in from Castlebar
    Studying the form: Lingfield Park.
    The long day begins.
    Keane's is gettin' space age now, they joke,
    with the Sky telly with the million channels;
    Get At The Races for us, Padraig, good laddeen.
    Get the lie of the prices for this afternoon.
    - I fancy a bet on Cantankerous Eric; led by five lengths last Friday
    says Hughie, sagely, not looking up, Seamus not hearing him,
    hearing himself suck on his lit up Major, first of the pack,
    feeling his ulcer retch to the smell of a match's sulphur,
    a reflux,
    a turn that waters the eyes and puts a sweat on ye,
    to be lined with a slug of stout.
    Seamus orders another round, without speaking,
    Padraig pours from behind the bar,
    a little puffy around the eyes,
    looking out through the window to the drizzle over Slievemore.
    This is how farmer's dole day always begins.
  • An to be here an to feckin know what it's like them tourists come over here through the door from Cleveland Ohio and London full of big talk an suits all pats on the back an wavin tanned arms at the bar askin me ha ha Brendan will ye sing a song?, that one (Hey Little Mother What's in your Bag? Chocolates and Sweets ) an they buy me a double or a pint an me noddin an shakin their hand an staggerin an singin for them an them smilin to each other an winkin good old Brendan never changes year to year a bit of the old culture they want to take my picture to show their friends back where their big houses an gardens an neighbourhoods are here's Brendan the singer ha ha (Hey Mr Postman What's in your Bag? a Note from your Beloved) but do they know I was over in England too in Bedford on the gangin an I met a girl she was fine black hair like a night mountain bird Sheila from Ballyhaunis she was a typist she was my girl she married some long toothed shoneen from Wexford I ended up on the park bench I went hard wakin up shiverin under car parks gettin banged up in the cop station it was 1966 the years of the World Cup (Hey Mr Tailor What's In your Bag? The Finest Wedding Dress) an my sisters helped pay for me to come back an when my mother died I had the farm by the sea an everyone said Brendan you're a farmer now haw good old Brendan always in the pub sing us a song we'll show your photo to Matty Campbell he's askin for ya you were in Bedford together? He's big in engineering in Cleveland you should have come with us whatever happened to that Sheila lass you were seeing? (Hey Mr Harvester What's in your Bag? Solitude and death).
  • He was in here last night where ye're sittin',
    Right on that stool where ye are,
    Only last night. He was puttin'
    Pints down an' had his cigar.
    He was wavin' his hands jus' like ye are,
    He was singin' us song after song.
    He was teachin' the priest to make prayer
    as they sat at the bar all night long.
    When somebody mentioned the banshee
    They'd heard on the road about ten
    He was laughin' at everyone's fancy
    An' jibed they were children, not men.
    He left about one and still talkin'
    Kissin' young Maggie and Bride
    He said he was able for walkin'
    And turned down the chance of a ride.
    They found him at dawn outside Grace's,
    Lyin' face down. Now you'll think:
    So much for yer givin' us faces
    an' airs like yer shit doesn't stink.
  • Peggy sits on the stool Padraig brought out for her on the swept part of the lino, near the fireplace (throwing an orange glow over her surgical stockings and pleated blue skirt). A straight backed, proud lady in a blazer, green blouse and pearls. Eighty two years of Sundays after mass in Keane's, fifty nine for the one red lemonade and drop of Jameson's - her little weekly treat - and this afternoon she's got pride of place in the pub. It's festival season: One son's back from Boston, with his second wife and their new baby; another, a New York cop, is here with his wife and their three teenagers, two girls and a boy all out playing football on the road outside with the local kids.
    Peggy sits in the middle of voices, smiles, reminiscences, people buying another quick round for the road. The windowlight is concave on her glasses; there's a brightness about her as she turns her bluerinsed head out towards the open pub door, whispering "I should tell 'em mind not go to near Ginty's new car ... He's a divil an' he'd a-be talkin' all over the place about them kids, ye know".
    She catches out of the corner of her eye Tom Malone, red faced, waddling up to the counter for service. She looks at him with his bald head and knock knees, and the trousers too short and showing his odd socks. He was the same sixty five years back, but with the head of ginger hair then and the brand new bike he'd wheel to the farm to ask Da about the use of the bull for his mammy's heavy Strawberry - that was the excuse, of course - he'd stick his head in the door of the living room and bow and blush and say Hello Peggy How Are Ye. And they would dance at Corrigan's Hall last Friday in the month and he would be clean and smell nice and not like the other lads who'd be smugglin' liquor in and blackguardin' 'til everyone went home under the eye of the priest. But old Mikey McFarlane in Crinnish died and his son Gerry had a farm of land, and so the match was made for her. She smiles; the wrinkles are laughter lines.
    Tom brushes past her gently returning with his drinks, "Hello Peggy, how's yesself?" Sure, I'm grand.
  • oldermanolderman Posts: 1,765
    .. and Bob's been beat down,
    hangs his head and only looks up when locking his lips to a glass,
    or chains his cigarette,
    sometimes when Bob's lungs wheeze, he chants with a breathing that does not allow him to inhale, only to wheeze,
    but Bob has a pocket full of coins and he's counting them out to get another round.. and begs a smoke from someone else,
    another story set in the drab, dark place where veterans go to silently cry..
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • That stick he comes in here with, it's an affectation when he enters and a necessity when he leaves. He sits all day by the back wall, underneath the jukebox and moaning forever about the fucking noise, drinking an IPA and scotch chaser, pulling gurning faces every time he negotiates a slug from the second glass. He's about five three, says he used to be five six. When he comes in the bar he's sixty three and when he leaves he says he's fifty tomorrow. After about the fourth or fifth scotch he says he was in Intelligence, secret missions he can't disclose but then names. Sometimes he studied Zoology at Exeter, or Ecology at UEA, sometimes he's an artist. Sometimes he was married and his wife died, sometimes he wonders aloud if he's gay and sometimes he says something the barmaid doesn't like at all that sends her scurrying for the landlord. Sometimes he pisses his trousers or falls head over heels over the table, knocking drinks over and picking up shards of broken glass to crush in his hands or eat. Never does the landlord say, You've had enough. Never does he leave without his paper with the half finished crossword, somebody else's lighter, and his stick.
  • oldermanolderman Posts: 1,765
    Sally still expected that Ted would come home to greet her with joyous surrender yet Ted had other intentions and he told Sally about his plans over a glass of tepid piss water which she simply threw over her shoulder...
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • The cry of a cliffstranded animal rolls out
    from the night's seawilderness,
    telling of legs spancelled hind to fore,
    of stinging cuts and lumps on rainsodden shanks,
    of a back bruiseheavy, weightbroken,
    of shivers shaking the moan of pain
    in the moonless dark.

    The cry rolls into old Michael Grealis, outside Keane's:
    His brute hands - broken at the knuckles
    by after hours falls and brawls on the bog road verge -
    cover a whiskeybloated face,
    stinging frog eyes,
    and a hairless head of cuts and bramble scars.

    Grealis stands in Keane's doorway,
    Chest rising, a nightwind making the blood pump fast
    in the lungs, making a tightness in his arm:
    He hears each echoed cry
    and cries back,
    You lucky,
    lucky fool,
    What I wouldn't give
    to be free
    like you.
  • oldermanolderman Posts: 1,765
    cindy wanders in and sees gayle talkin to her man..
    gayle is so sweet, she wants everyman to feel happy..
    and so they both compete for feelings that are pure and clear and physical

    living nearby gives cindy an advantage and the sugar dads come stumbling drunk for the promise of a moment of promises never kept and steeped oh so deep in the promise of a life of compromises and situations of love left in the darkness that is the truth of cindy's existence as she once again gives up her humanity for what..
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • dyaogirldyaogirl Posts: 138
    So did you hear! Now let it be it known I am certainly never one to take it upon myself to talk ill will of ANYONE especially an upstanding member of our community! Yet, a position of esteemed prominence such as the reverends wife holds with it duties and responsibilities that we MUST hold the individual accountable too. I feel it is my DUTY to inform the upstanding people of this community that the reverends wife has been sighted in places NOT serving the best interests of our closely held community as her position would strictly dictate! I am informing you as my confidant and best friend! This information, of course it is strictly between us and no one is to find out! I was told this information in the strictest of confidences from a very reliable source!

    Now she’s been spotted MORE than once, not walking, but stumbling YES STUMBLING out of Keane’s bar! Conspiring with that hussy little bar fly Mary Conway! Whose promiscuous ways the most liberal of our community have noted! Pouring drinks for the likes of those less fortunate singing likes they have no cares in the world! She has been consorting with unsavory characters like Hughie and Seamus, who spend most evenings drinking and watching that sky telly while betting their share of a good days wages on the ponies! We must note that these characters are not proper company for a Reverend’s wife and it is in our community’s best interest that I inform you of this sordid behavior due a woman of her position! I tell you of this knowing full well you will keep it in your utmost confidences and not to tell another!
    '..... Ah! A perfect illustration of the poststructuralist paradox. Does the signifier "Merlot" correspond with the 'truth' of the bottle I polished off last night, or do we hold in our thoughts a different "signified" of bottle-of-Merlot-ness? Perhaps we're dreaming of the same bottle!" -FinsburyParkCarrots

  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    Mom called me down to Steamy's. She said there were free hot dogs and that she wouldn't be home to make dinner. There wasn't anything in the fridge anyway. So... I went. A one-block walk and I was in. The place smelled like an eight-year old stale rum and coke with maraschino cherries, and smoke. Bars always smell like smoke. The bar was packed to the doors with people. Steamy doesn't give out free hot dogs on just any old day. I don't remember what made this day more special than the others, but there you have it... free hot dogs. I was a pudgy little 11 year old. The old gal's gal.

    The old gal told her bar-friend to go say, "hello" to her daughter. He introduced himself and took my hand in faux chivalry. He bent over it, and proceeded to lick me from knuckle to wrist.

    Now the story goes, that that fucker left the bar with quite the shiner.

    Personally, I don't believe it.

    Good try, though... huh?
  • Three blokes are at the bar talking in accents belonging to no region as such, a region of regions, faces sculpted by the randomness of knuckled pointless passion, shirts too small for gutted frames, ears twisted to look like battered brains, eyes as wet and stupid as lager. Their argot is gurgling, their actions roundhouse demonstrations of punches said to have been thrown and probably thrown, yes, at smaller men. I pass them, regretting choosing this pub for a warm, flat pint, to the bathroom.
    At the urinal a door hits my back hard. A splash hits my left elbow. It's blood, you know. The eldest of the three retches up showers of red and I tie myself up and head to the bar to ask the landlady for a quiet word of which in her gin drenched state she can't handle. Ooooooooooo, she says, waddling, fluttering arms. She calls her son loudly, a haw hawing would-be jockey with backward teeth: She hands him a bucket. A debate ensues.
    So much for a quiet word. The two friends of the ill man crowd me, and don't check their associate.
    When the door is finally opened to the bathroom, cleaning goes on, but they come closer, practicing their bullying tactics that worked on those who have nothing to do but lap up the way lies can be taught, and wars can be fought, on small minded small mens' muscle in packs. I am called a liar. I never saw blood. And am I making something of it? Am I? These two come up to my shoulder, and I roar: Am I making something of it? Am I? Am I?
    Yes. I am. I'm making something of Bush and Cheney and Blair and Straw and Aznar and Kissinger and Murdoch and little lying swine who gather around the innocent bystander and beat them into saying they didn't see the bloody damage of their recklessness. And then I'm going up the road where you can't get in. And I feel self-righteous. And I can take a bath. And I can make something of you for people to see you, little men.
  • God, I feel better after that!

    :D
  • Originally posted by dyaogirl
    So did you hear! Now let it be it known I am certainly never one to take it upon myself to talk ill will of ANYONE especially an upstanding member of our community! Yet, a position of esteemed prominence such as the reverends wife holds with it duties and responsibilities that we MUST hold the individual accountable too. I feel it is my DUTY to inform the upstanding people of this community that the reverends wife has been sighted in places NOT serving the best interests of our closely held community as her position would strictly dictate! I am informing you as my confidant and best friend! This information, of course it is strictly between us and no one is to find out! I was told this information in the strictest of confidences from a very reliable source!

    Now she’s been spotted MORE than once, not walking, but stumbling YES STUMBLING out of Keane’s bar! Conspiring with that hussy little bar fly Mary Conway! Whose promiscuous ways the most liberal of our community have noted! Pouring drinks for the likes of those less fortunate singing likes they have no cares in the world! She has been consorting with unsavory characters like Hughie and Seamus, who spend most evenings drinking and watching that sky telly while betting their share of a good days wages on the ponies! We must note that these characters are not proper company for a Reverend’s wife and it is in our community’s best interest that I inform you of this sordid behavior due a woman of her position! I tell you of this knowing full well you will keep it in your utmost confidences and not to tell another!

    Smiles from the public bar to the saloon! And far, far beyond! :):):)
  • Just bumping this because I feel everyone's got a bar tale in them.
  • oldermanolderman Posts: 1,765
    glad this is back becuz i have a few bar scenes i need to tell y'all about.. just give me a cyber moment of incandescent slither and i will do justice to this thread.. yes i will, i will indeed..
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • Okey dokey. :)
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    my father drank himself to death....
    it started in dublin
    but soon he was fumblin through hell
    I helped him....held him.....
    and I know the drinker's drink
    I knew my father once....
    when he was a monaghan boy...
    at Brigid's or Hugh's.....or Jack's....
    but all I got back was a stupid poem....
    he roamed thru hell with me at his side
    I was his pride and his joy
    no, not a boy
    a gril.....and the pills they made him swallow
    as I sank in Madrid....
    it's just what he did....
    Bridey's.....cat got your tongue
    I knew him when he was young...
    my father got rolled out...of bars....
    he's the man from mars
    the man on the moon....
    the little prince
    he drinks now
    somewhere......
    God, I loved him....
    and I had to listen to Hugh Og....and Niall....
    and all of them go on about Joyce and Brit Pop....
    when I couldn't give a fuk
    in my leather pants.....
    (are you famous?)
    we'd go to sandymount to the recycling place
    so the scars would leave no trace
    on my mother
    the poor unfortunate fukker.....
    I'll dance on her grave
    and take grave exception
    to any defection from
    my father....
    Larry - The Man.....
    God I love him still....
    rosy cheeks that my child has now....
    fukkin cow
    my mother.....
    I'd rather slather at the gates of Hell
    than wish her well...
    wishing well dreams for you, son.....
    children of my heart....
    it's a good start....
    ya fat old fart
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
Sign In or Register to comment.