Sand-Dedicated to PJ who inspires!!!!

Ali

Chapter Four
The Earth touches home.


The sea and sand meet.
Sand has a home to call her own,
she has survived the ravaging storm,
with lessons to learn,
on tolerance,forbiddeness, and pleasure in
thrillseeking agonies.
Sand did not count on the ravaging storm
to be so cantankerous,
and devastating...
but she has lived through the ordeal,
ready once again to open her heart
to the ways of the World
and to the great Universe
that lies around her.
Mother Light has looked at her child-
"I have raised a child of the Earthen Ground,
who has learned her lessons that
the winds can create conflict,
that there is turmoil in numbers"
Sand has grown large,
her immense, grainy, body stretching miles
through the unchartered territories of Father Sea
while,I,
the ancesteral sky looks on.
My hues are glistening upon
her resting plateaus of tanning sea beads,
as she contemplates her next move,
her next meeting with the unknown
in this land so big and broad.
Miniscule raindrops begin to lightly sing
sweet melodies on her vast stretch of plain,
as she soaks them luxuriously down to her body,
to be caught at her base by Father Sea...
"Its raining..." she meekly cries.
Her sand pressurizes,joins even deeper and closer
in parental bond to Sea
while Mother Light looks on to envelope the sight
which Sand is about to hold witness to.
First Blue,then
Red,Orange,Pink, Yellow.
Sand witnesses her first Rainbow.
Her reaction seems a subtle one,
allowing Mother Light to spread my sky's colors
over her illustrious form,
The Rainbow,
the symbol that we do exist
and our collaborations breed beauty shining,
has touched Sand immeasurably.
She begins to move,forming
rounded orbs along her body,
dunes,
begins to enter a new stage of workmanship
within her growing frame.
The winds lightly blow,
those which
she had felt so adventurous to explore before
have become unforsaken in the perils of war.
She has learned to let the storm blow over
wait patiently for all to suffice
and the familial ties will be rejoined
and the Storm will cease.
The winds rise and fall in patterns
as Sand stares into my sky
focusing on Mother Light
and Clinging to Father Sea.
No storm tonight.
The Rainbow they worked so dearly upon
will shine bright today,
fo Sand is The guest of honor.
She has realized her home,
above Father Sea,
under Mother Light,
With the sun beating,
and the tides churning.

Allison D. Vigh


(Tell me what you all think...I have Three other chapters before this...but I'm trying to get the whole piece together)

Ms. Haiku

Ali wrote:

Chapter Four
The Earth touches home.


The sea and sand meet.
Sand has a home to call her own,
she has survived the ravaging storm,
with lessons to learn,
on tolerance,forbiddeness, and pleasure in
thrillseeking agonies.
Sand did not count on the ravaging storm
to be so cantankerous,
and devastating...
but she has lived through the ordeal,
ready once again to open her heart
to the ways of the World
and to the great Universe
that lies around her.
Mother Light has looked at her child-
"I have raised a child of the Earthen Ground,
who has learned her lessons that
the winds can create conflict,
that there is turmoil in numbers"
Sand has grown large,
her immense, grainy, body stretching miles
through the unchartered territories of Father Sea
while,I,
the ancesteral sky looks on.
My hues are glistening upon
her resting plateaus of tanning sea beads,
as she contemplates her next move,
her next meeting with the unknown
in this land so big and broad.
Miniscule raindrops begin to lightly sing
sweet melodies on her vast stretch of plain,
as she soaks them luxuriously down to her body,
to be caught at her base by Father Sea...
"Its raining..." she meekly cries.
Her sand pressurizes,joins even deeper and closer
in parental bond to Sea
while Mother Light looks on to envelope the sight
which Sand is about to hold witness to.
First Blue,then
Red,Orange,Pink, Yellow.
Sand witnesses her first Rainbow.
Her reaction seems a subtle one,
allowing Mother Light to spread my sky's colors
over her illustrious form,
The Rainbow,
the symbol that we do exist
and our collaborations breed beauty shining,
has touched Sand immeasurably.
She begins to move,forming
rounded orbs along her body,
dunes,
begins to enter a new stage of workmanship
within her growing frame.
The winds lightly blow,
those which
she had felt so adventurous to explore before
have become unforsaken in the perils of war.
She has learned to let the storm blow over
wait patiently for all to suffice
and the familial ties will be rejoined
and the Storm will cease.
The winds rise and fall in patterns
as Sand stares into my sky
focusing on Mother Light
and Clinging to Father Sea.
No storm tonight.
The Rainbow they worked so dearly upon
will shine bright today,
fo Sand is The guest of honor.
She has realized her home,
above Father Sea,
under Mother Light,
With the sun beating,
and the tides churning.

Allison D. Vigh


(Tell me what you all think...I have Three other chapters before this...but I'm trying to get the whole piece together)

I like it. If you keep sand as always courageous, not meek, not worried about war, the tone may be more consistent. Also, I'm not sure what perils of war are involved with sand in this poem. The light, sea, and sand, though partially humanized, seem more accepting of flowing than those involved with perils of war.

Ali

Thank you for the advice...I'll keep it while finishing the piece.The war has to do with the struggles of "the storm" in the previous Chapter,(but explained briefly in this Chapter,).Thanks for taking the time to read it!
ali

olderman

i wish i could write a sweeping poem such as this.. i am best at structured poesy and prose.. however, i am enjoying the jam board and the most talented postin' poets that could ever be.. don't turn on the lights, cuz i don't want to sea..

thanks for the poem

Ali

olderman wrote:

i wish i could write a sweeping poem such as this.. i am best at structured poesy and prose.. however, i am enjoying the jam board and the most talented postin' poets that could ever be.. don't turn on the lights, cuz i don't want to sea..

thanks for the poem

Thank you...these things just sort of come if you let your muse take you there I guess....?