hitting the bottom

catefrances

i needed you
and you weren't there for me
and now i see
you never will be
can't imagine what i was thinking
when i thought you'd be different
can't imagine what i was thinking
when i thought i was worth it
i can't get my head around
the thoughts in my head
i can't get my thinking straight
and it's killing me
slowly
it eats away my heart
and is breaking me down
and i don't know how long i can wait
before i hit the ground
you can't imagine what i'm thinking
and what it is i feel
and how the fuck could you
when you keep you to yourself
i feel so overwhelmed and i just want it to end
with me still breathing and thoughts of you at an end
but if you don't tell me
i'll make it up for myself
and God that's so selfish
that you'd think of me that way
you probably think i'm foolish
with these words i have to share
but tis the only thing i have left
that is solely in my control
i hate the way youve made me feel
i wish that i could die
but this silence is like a dagger
and no words are like a lie

Being Enlightened

For some reason, this reminded me of Helter Skelter..."When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide, where I stop and I turn and I go for a ride, get to the bottom and I see you again..."

This poem made me feel sad and makes me think that wishing to die is really no way to live...broken hearts suck!