days with davey

catefrances

i'm going to send my angels
down to the lake tonight
to drown these sorrows of mine
that are holding me down
i'm stand on that wooden bridge
with my arms raised high
making sure i fall the right way
leaning against the rail
looking down at the current swirl
around the reeds
a small smile comes to my face
a thought forms in my head
i look over at davey
and he just knows what i'm gonna do
he smiles back
he has no intentions of standing in my way
he never does
he's good that way
mama says he's bad that way
he says, "do it girl if you're gonna
so's i can take you home
to the warmth of my bed
just do it
concentrate
don't be making no mistake"
i step up and over the rail
my arms stretched behind me
holding on
so's i don't go before i want to
i hear the crack of a rifle
ducks fly from the creek bank
my head starts thumping
my heart to race
adrenalin rush
i let go
down i fall
not even with much style
hit the water
it doesn't stop me
under i go
the world above closes off from me
close my eyes
my mouth
my bare feet touch the bottom
all slimy mud and twigs
and what my imagination says is a skull
but in actuality, a stone rubbed smooth over time
floating back to the surface
in no real hurry to return
my lungs burning with rage
i want to open my eyes
but know i see more with them closed
later
lying next to davey
staring up at a ceiling
yellowing plaster flaking with age
he says i'm crazy
says he likes me that way
i tell him
just cause you shouldn't
never seemed like much of an excuse to me
how about just cause you should
i look into his brown eyes
and say
well that's just no excuse at all
and as we slip beneath the covers
and kiss each other's anxious lips
he gives me more that night
than he will ever know.