trapped

catefrances

Like a moth trapped in a lampshade
My emotions torn to shreds
I wait for you with a patience
I never knew I had
When the world around me falls away
And leaves a silence too big for only me to fill
I reach out for you
but you’re not there
you can’t seem to make the break
it’s excuses only that leave your lips
so alone I sit in my hall of mirrors
a life created within my own mind
waiting for my reality to start
but like that moth trapped in the lampshade
I’ve become a creature destined to die alone.

Holey Ghost

break out fo the cocoon
and explore the world
waiting, waiting for your touch

for if you never reach out
nothing will pull you out
life can be cruel
when survival is the game

so take a step
you won't regret
all will fall sometime
it's those that get back up and move on
who survive and live

so give what your heart soul can give
and what love you give
will come back in bundles
cuddling you to go on and live

catefrances

sometimes it's not that easy. you can be as willing as a whore, but if he's the one in the cage, your hands are tied.

Holey Ghost

catefrances wrote:

sometimes it's not that easy. you can be as willing as a whore, but if he's the one in the cage, your hands are tied.

yes I know
but look inside
and see who's got the key
to untie the knots
and set you free

catefrances

him. that's who. and i just feel fucked. i am not in a good place at the moment.

Holey Ghost

we all my think that others
hold the ties that bind us
yet is only our agreement
that those ties have the power to do so

The only reason anything can hurt one
is because we have either hurt another
or somehow have agreed to be the effect of another

The key is be CAUSE, not effect of the universe
we each have our own world
and can be control of that, yet it's fun to just let it ride
yet if we're not careful, turns to suicide

Take back control, be cause, not effect
It's easier said than done
but that's what has to be
to be free
and be, yourself

catefrances

don't talk to me in poetry. this is my life i'm talking about here. this is not an abstract concept.

Holey Ghost

sorry, sometimes I get carried away.

What I am saying is this. Only you, have the power to control your own fate, your own destiny, your own feelings, your own life.

If anyone, and I mean anyone has exerted their control over all these aspects of your world, only you have the power to take back that control.

The highest purpose in the universe is the creation of an effect. That's a simple yet abstract concept I know but an absolute truth. And many many people unwittingly or unknowingly agree to be the effect of someone one else, and thereby release control of their own world.

The answer truly is, is to slowly, baby steps if you have to, take back control, by being Cause. By that I mean have good intentions, good thoughts, express good words, and do good deeds.Negative things and negativeness tend to boomerang and implode on one.

Be Good Cause by having good positive intentions, no matter how much you may want to do otherwise, and you will create good things.

Again, easier said than done, yet the only way thru a mess, is to go straight thru it without deviation. Confront it head-on and will see the light at the end of any tunnel.

Holey Ghost

I have to go now and I'll be back in 6 hrs, and if you'd like to PM re any of this please feel free.

bluejourneyman

Is it a 100 watt light-bulb this moth is bouncing off of? If it is you may want to switch to a 60 watt light-bulb ;P

catefrances

don't know about the wattage but the attraction is strong nonetheless.

bluejourneyman

Roses are red
Roses are yellow
I am going to live to 100
How about u?

catefrances

Holey Ghost wrote:

sorry, sometimes I get carried away.

What I am saying is this. Only you, have the power to control your own fate, your own destiny, your own feelings, your own life.

If anyone, and I mean anyone has exerted their control over all these aspects of your world, only you have the power to take back that control.

The highest purpose in the universe is the creation of an effect. That's a simple yet abstract concept I know but an absolute truth. And many many people unwittingly or unknowingly agree to be the effect of someone one else, and thereby release control of their own world.

The answer truly is, is to slowly, baby steps if you have to, take back control, by being Cause. By that I mean have good intentions, good thoughts, express good words, and do good deeds.Negative things and negativeness tend to boomerang and implode on one.

Be Good Cause by having good positive intentions, no matter how much you may want to do otherwise, and you will create good things.

Again, easier said than done, yet the only way thru a mess, is to go straight thru it without deviation. Confront it head-on and will see the light at the end of any tunnel.

i think you may be right. i think my strength will come in letting him go. fuck knows i couldn't feel any worse that i do right now.

Bu2

is a hard thing to do.
You leave a person
and you also leave you.

No more poetry, though, Cate. I'll speak to you true.

I had 10 years of fireworks and stars and stripes and bruises with a man I thought loved me. In his own way, he did. In my own way, I loved him too. But I was running away from myself as much as I was running away from him, when I finally left.

I'm still finding myself. But I find that, what I do find, is an old sweet familiar friend who went through a lot of pain, and still managed to keep the best of herself to herself....for herself.

I hope this helps. Peace,

Bu

depopulationINC

catefrances wrote:

Like a moth trapped in a lampshade
My emotions torn to shreds
I wait for you with a patience
I never knew I had
When the world around me falls away
And leaves a silence too big for only me to fill
I reach out for you
but you’re not there
you can’t seem to make the break
it’s excuses only that leave your lips
so alone I sit in my hall of mirrors
a life created within my own mind
waiting for my reality to start
but like that moth trapped in the lampshade
I’ve become a creature destined to die alone.

wow, I really enoyed this

twin1

Cate,

I really feel for you with this read...I have been there, it really hurts to let go...sometimes you have to and things go alot different than you thought they would...I have found though that if the situation is "right" and it is meant to be, even in time, it will be...sometimes change is the only thing that helps...and if the situation is "wrong" and bad for you, you have saved even more grief than you would encounter hanging on...remember - you can't change anyone else, only yourself...good luck to you, I pray that you find much love and peace