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Felicity

when the reality sets in
and it's still the same
old same old same old
of you wishing that i
didn't need you
for even three words
it's cold
and so alone
where i am

when the visions come clear
and it's still the same
old song old song old
one that we've sung
of wishes for the future
didn't know you
for even three seconds
it's hot
and so stifling
where i am

when the dream comes back
and it's still the same
old dream old dream old
one we both shared
of true love and kindness
didn't ignore you
for even three moments
it's turmoil
and so agonizing
where i am

when will you see me
for everything i am
and all that i gave
when will you know
that you can be free
in the private world
we built up over time
and for me
it never changes
as you wished
your everything
no matter what

games,darling
but i know you

i love you still

grooveamatic

very nice! it's rare that an angsty-lost-love poem gives me the thrill I get when reading an exciting work, but yours sent a chill up my spine...I like the repetitons, and how your lines are split up. cool!

coleen

glad to see you posting poetry felicity. i always enjoy reading your thoughts and they are often able to say things in a way i couldn't say them for myself.

nailz100

I these these beautiful lines could go well with music... Less anger than I am accustomed to, but I really like it.

Righteous Jammer

I liked this poem very much..Thanks for sharing

Felicity

nailz100 wrote:

I these these beautiful lines could go well with music... Less anger than I am accustomed to, but I really like it.

thank you,i heard music while it was flowing out.

less anger,eh?is that a good thing?

Felicity

a poet wrote:

I liked this poem very much..Thanks for sharing

i like to share everything.

nailz100

Its not like I write angry poems all the time...I don't. Just when I do, they seem to have alot more aggression/ rage. I liked your poem, and I think it truly expesses the feeling of having no energy left to scream....almost like the calm after the storm....beautiful.

Felicity

nailz100 wrote:

I think it truly expesses the feeling of having no energy left to scream....almost like the calm after the storm....beautiful.

i like the way you stated this.perhaps no energy left to scream means that healing and love may now enter the spirit.after all,love is everything and the only way.

Felicity

charles wrote:

as you put your colors on essential experiences, you makes us all go through it again, but then old memorys seem to have something new, thanks Felicity,
Charles

love is perpetually renewing,that's why.



bonne nuit ou maintenant=bon matin,charles

(the day is masculine and the night is feminine-fascinating, isn't it?)

EvilToasterElf

I have to say this was deceptively good. This poem reinforces itself every stanza and has some beautiful moments. I don't know why but when I read it I want the last lines to move with the stanza, something like where I was, where I am, where I'll be -- that's just me though, this is a candid work, well done.

Felicity

EvilToasterElf wrote:

where I was, where I am, where I'll be --

maybe.

it's a tad hard to explain the structure,but suffice to say it's intentional that the last verse smears all over the place.