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tell me what you think about this

jamheadjamhead Posts: 16
edited March 2006 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
on my journey
ive come across no road of yellow bricks
Ive learned words hurt more than stones or sticks
but silence is the most painful thing
im like an eagle who once soared high
but now has a broken wing
so i just lie in this spot on the ground
ill try to fly every once in a while
but just end up spinning round
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • karma defectkarma defect Posts: 5,483
    I thought it was a good read. I especially like how you turned around sticks and stones to fit your perpose. In Holland that would be called poetly freedom. Good on you.
    « One man's glory is another man's hell.
    You’re on the outside, never bound by such a spell.
    Together in the darkness, alone in the light.
    I took it upon me to be yours, Timmy,
    I’ll lead your angels and demons at play tonight......»
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    It's good. Rhyme and flow of word sounds are good. Maybe an example of:

    Ive learned words hurt more than stones or sticks
    but silence is the most painful thing

    as this is interesting.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
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