Tears For You

sevensins

I am a mistake
I am a sorry smile
You love is suiside
but it makes me smile
you know it's easyer
to look for someone else
but look inside ourselves, I'll take the hard way
You say you want love
I wanna die
you watch the pigion
who will never fly
I say I'm sorry
for how i feel
I want to scream
& make it real

-I want you toch, your words, your skin
I'm sorry, to late, my life begins-

--Why cant I cry?!!
Should have seen this comeing
Should have halted my love for you
Why cant I cry?!!
should have stayed in nowere
should have known no one loves me, never will--

Although I must be dead
I wanna talk to you
wisper in your ear
& try to get it through
You know it's harder, To live through pain
but darling you love is too much to gain
you say you want out
well so do I
your trip to heaven,will cost both our lives

-pre-
--Why cant I cry?!!
should have seen this comeing
should have halted my love for you
Why cant I cry?!!
should have stayed in nowere
I'm sick of bleeding out my tears over you--




why cant I cry, why cant i cry, why cant I cry, WHY?!!.......why

sevensins

I acsept, you sucks. Just tell me why I suck......I need feedback, cuz if i dont get anything I dont know what to do! Work more or keep as is? Or just go on a rampage and steal all the bannanas in the world....eather way..

coleen

seven its been a ghost town around here the last two days with the exception of the valiant efforts of a few very special people trying to keep the heart of this forum beating. i would guess that is probably the reason for the lack of responses - hope you haven't taken it personally.

i think its one of your best so far - very direct and heartfelt. as a matter of fact i like it so much its hard to pick which part i like best, every line adds to the overall mood and i think this one shows how much you continue to grow as a writer.

Being Enlightened

Originally posted by coleen
i think its one of your best so far - very direct and heartfelt. as a matter of fact i like it so much its hard to pick which part i like best, every line adds to the overall mood and i think this one shows how much you continue to grow as a writer.

sevensins--I did read this one a couple of times yesterday, but I didn't know what to say. I think coleen summed it up quite nicely!

CranMalReign

Originally posted by sevensins
I am a mistake
I am a sorry smile

I relate to those lines so well. At least I used to.

Actually, I've related to the feelings in this whole poem, but those first two lines for different reasons.

Hits home for me.

sevensins

Originally posted by CranMalReign
I relate to those lines so well. At least I used to.

Actually, I've related to the feelings in this whole poem, but those first two lines for different reasons.

Hits home for me.

thats my favorite line to, glad you like it