Home› Poetry, Prose, Music & Art

Communication

Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
edited September 2005 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
He watched the rain fall
and choked on words
unspoken,
The spaces inbetween
were just too wide for
silence,
His eyes, hard to read,
his heart beat but he was
mute,
She put his fingers
to her lips, kissed them
quietly,

She only wants to understand.
Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    oh....




    lovely, being.... just lovely


    hail hail
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    Being Enlightened wrote:
    He watched the rain fall
    and choked on words
    unspoken,
    The spaces inbetween
    were just too wide for
    silence,
    His eyes, hard to read,
    his heart beat but he was
    mute,
    She put his fingers
    to her lips, kissed them
    quietly,

    She only wants to understand.
    I just looked at a photgraph of a woman with a gun in the Arts section under the heading something like "what's the first word?" When I view that picture and then read this poem it's very interesting how it grabs me. It's probably the opposite of how it's suppose to be though, interesting, though.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    there's definitely poems hanging 'round those thoughts, bib

    nice connection
  • twin2twin2 Posts: 894
    This was very nice. So much sympathy and warmth.
  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    :) Thanks, folks!

    Bibliobella, I like that you get something different from it, that's very cool. :) Poetry is open to interpretation, in my opinion and we can each get something different from the same words. That's part of the beauty of it! I went and looked at that picture you mentionned and I like that you found a connection between it and my poem---it's a great pic! And yes, although my poem came from warmer feelings, seeing that pic and re-reading this poem, I can see how you could connect it. I now could see this poem as the aftermath of events---a girl, frustrated, finally at the end of her rope, in the heat of the moment, she pulls the trigger and then realizes she's made a terrible mistake and is left kneeling in a pool of his blood, crying, kissing fingers that will never really touch her again. Thanks for reading it and getting something different out of it! :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • Righteous JammerRighteous Jammer Posts: 509
    understand...Please take my hand
    It doesnt hurt.... when I bleed
    but memories...they eat me
    I've seen it all before,...
    bring it on cause I'm no victim.
    -Ghost
  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    a poet wrote:
    understand...Please take my hand

    *reaches out to a poet* :)

    Please grasp this span!
    Together,
    We shall cross this sand,
    Together,
    We will share this land.

    :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    Being Enlightened wrote:
    *reaches out to a poet* :)

    Please grasp this span!
    Together,
    We shall cross this sand,
    Together,
    We will share this land.

    :)
    waves are never alone
    tugged by a server of landlighted stars
    hiding the messages in bottles
    broken then sunk between sand heavy barges.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • AliAli Posts: 2,621
    Bibliobella wrote:
    waves are never alone
    tugged by a server of landlighted stars
    hiding the messages in bottles
    broken then sunk between sand heavy barges.
    And as I read the message,overwhelmed with compassion for my sailor's lament,
    I shed a tear.


    Nice poem BE.I have to pay you a compliment on this board for everyone to read...I really enjoyed that.
    And I really DO enjoy reading EVERYONE's work froma professional standpoint.The styles and verses really are quite unique and I appreciate the time involved in reading mine as well.


    allison
    A whisper and a thrill
    A whisper and a chill
    adv2005

    "Why do I bother?"
    The 11th Commandment.
    "Whatever"

    PETITION TO STOP THE BAN OF SMOKING IN BARS IN THE UNITED STATES....Anyone?
  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    Ali wrote:
    And as I read the message,overwhelmed with compassion for my sailor's lament,
    I shed a tear.

    A drop in the ocean,
    rippling,
    caressing the shores.

    Happening upon her
    feeling,
    he's immersed in love.

    Awash in comfort,
    smiling,
    he blows kisses to the wind.

    Ali wrote:
    Nice poem BE.I have to pay you a compliment on this board for everyone to read...I really enjoyed that.
    And I really DO enjoy reading EVERYONE's work froma professional standpoint.The styles and verses really are quite unique and I appreciate the time involved in reading mine as well.


    allison

    Thanks, Ali! :) And I agree, it's nice to know that a little piece of you can touch others. I also think it's important to be supportive and encouraging because even if technically, a poem isn't all there, there's still feeling behind it and someone who's just trying to be creative in their own way. :) I love that people share here and I enjoy reading all the offerings I'm able to get to throughout the day. :)

    PS. I loved your addition, Bibliobella! :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
Sign In or Register to comment.