Frodo & Sam - A Haiku

fanch75fanch75 Posts: 3,734
edited December 2005 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
That cloak becomes you
Raise your sword
And destroy the One Ring
Oh Sam, you're so sweet
Do you remember Rock & Roll Radio?
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • thatgirlthatgirl Posts: 3,671
    brilliant....
    "I hear Fanch has a Pimp Cup and loves Kiss. I think that's all that really matters."
  • vedderwoodvedderwood Posts: 2,029
    Fanch, you're a pure genius in assless pants!!!!
    DC 6/14/98
    NJ 8/28 & 8/29/98
    NJ 9/1 & 9/2/00
    PA 4/28/03
    NJ 7/5 & 7/6/03
    NY 7/8/03
    PA 7/12/03
    PA 10/1/04
    DC 10/11/04
    NJ 9/30 & 10/1/05
    PA 10/3/05
    NJ 5/27 & 5/28/06
    DC 5/30/06
    NJ 6/1 & 6/3/06
    WA 7/22 & 7/23/06
    IL 8/5/07
    NJ 6/19 & 6/20/08
    DC 6/22/08
    NY 6/24 & 6/25/08
    NY 7/1/08
    PA 10/27, 10/28, 10/30 & 10/31/09
  • Solat13Solat13 Posts: 6,996
    fanch75 wrote:
    That cloak becomes you
    Raise your sword
    And destroy the One Ring
    Oh Sam, you're so sweet

    Dude that's not a haiku.

    A haiku is a poem with 3 lines and 17 syllables in a 5-7-5 format and traditional haikus usually include a mention of one of the 4 seasons.

    Sorry, but the haiku police have spoken.

    "Nice attempt there Fanch
    But on this winter's chill night
    You have wrote free verse"
    - Busted down the pretext
    - 8/28/98
    - 9/2/00
    - 4/28/03, 5/3/03, 7/3/03, 7/5/03, 7/6/03, 7/9/03, 7/11/03, 7/12/03, 7/14/03
    - 9/28/04, 9/29/04, 10/1/04, 10/2/04
    - 9/11/05, 9/12/05, 9/13/05, 9/30/05, 10/1/05, 10/3/05
    - 5/12/06, 5/13/06, 5/27/06, 5/28/06, 5/30/06, 6/1/06, 6/3/06, 6/23/06, 7/22/06, 7/23/06, 12/2/06, 12/9/06
    - 8/2/07, 8/5/07
    - 6/19/08, 6/20/08, 6/22/08, 6/24/08, 6/25/08, 6/27/08, 6/28/08, 6/30/08, 7/1/08
    - 8/23/09, 8/24/09, 9/21/09, 9/22/09, 10/27/09, 10/28/09, 10/30/09, 10/31/09
    - 5/15/10, 5/17/10, 5/18/10, 5/20/10, 5/21/10, 10/23/10, 10/24/10
    - 9/11/11, 9/12/11
    - 10/18/13, 10/21/13, 10/22/13, 11/30/13, 12/4/13
  • vedderwoodvedderwood Posts: 2,029
    Solat13 wrote:
    Dude that's not a haiku.

    A haiku is a poem with 3 lines and 17 syllables in a 5-7-5 format and traditional haikus usually include a mention of one of the 4 seasons.

    Sorry, but the haiku police have spoken.

    "Nice attempt there Fanch
    But on this winter's chill night
    You have wrote free verse"

    Awww, leave poor little "Evolution Fanchy" alone!!! He tried...hahahaha :D

    And for the record, I would have had no clue what a haiku to a free verse was! Thanks for explaining Joe!!! :D
    DC 6/14/98
    NJ 8/28 & 8/29/98
    NJ 9/1 & 9/2/00
    PA 4/28/03
    NJ 7/5 & 7/6/03
    NY 7/8/03
    PA 7/12/03
    PA 10/1/04
    DC 10/11/04
    NJ 9/30 & 10/1/05
    PA 10/3/05
    NJ 5/27 & 5/28/06
    DC 5/30/06
    NJ 6/1 & 6/3/06
    WA 7/22 & 7/23/06
    IL 8/5/07
    NJ 6/19 & 6/20/08
    DC 6/22/08
    NY 6/24 & 6/25/08
    NY 7/1/08
    PA 10/27, 10/28, 10/30 & 10/31/09
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    fanch75 wrote:
    That cloak becomes you
    Raise your sword
    And destroy the One Ring
    Oh Sam, you're so sweet
    night enshrouded
    by fire destroyed
    pathway

    I guess I need to see the third movie, eh? :)

    Haiku does not need to be 5-7-5 syllables or 3 lines. 17 syllables seems too long for what a haiku is really about. It is a moment of insight which in English language could be 9-15 syllables and 1-3 lines. I haven't found many good 1 line English language haiku. Haiku is meant to be given as a gift. The seasonal reference includes the reader in the moment as the poet and the reader will have a foundation on which to share the moment. By adding some sort of reference that will include the reader in the moment the haiku is gift.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Solat13Solat13 Posts: 6,996
    Haiku - from dictionary.com

    1. A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
    2. A poem written in this form.
    - Busted down the pretext
    - 8/28/98
    - 9/2/00
    - 4/28/03, 5/3/03, 7/3/03, 7/5/03, 7/6/03, 7/9/03, 7/11/03, 7/12/03, 7/14/03
    - 9/28/04, 9/29/04, 10/1/04, 10/2/04
    - 9/11/05, 9/12/05, 9/13/05, 9/30/05, 10/1/05, 10/3/05
    - 5/12/06, 5/13/06, 5/27/06, 5/28/06, 5/30/06, 6/1/06, 6/3/06, 6/23/06, 7/22/06, 7/23/06, 12/2/06, 12/9/06
    - 8/2/07, 8/5/07
    - 6/19/08, 6/20/08, 6/22/08, 6/24/08, 6/25/08, 6/27/08, 6/28/08, 6/30/08, 7/1/08
    - 8/23/09, 8/24/09, 9/21/09, 9/22/09, 10/27/09, 10/28/09, 10/30/09, 10/31/09
    - 5/15/10, 5/17/10, 5/18/10, 5/20/10, 5/21/10, 10/23/10, 10/24/10
    - 9/11/11, 9/12/11
    - 10/18/13, 10/21/13, 10/22/13, 11/30/13, 12/4/13
  • thatgirlthatgirl Posts: 3,671
    the point is...fanch is a poet and he doesnt even know it!
    "I hear Fanch has a Pimp Cup and loves Kiss. I think that's all that really matters."
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    Solat13 wrote:
    Haiku - from dictionary.com

    1. A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
    2. A poem written in this form.
    It didn't mention the gift aspect, it didn't mention the history, and the main point of haiku - this insight, the flash, the world in a moment. This is a worthless definition obviously written by someone who doesn't write haiku, but who ignores that

    haiku is 2 syllables in English and 3 sound units in Japanese
    tanka is 2 syllables in English and 3 sound units in Japanese

    what is 17 sound units in Japanese haiku is incorrectly translated as 17 syllables in English haiku. Some dictionary guru just heard it was 17 syllables finished the incorrect definition, and moved on to the next word.

    I first learned of haiku in 2nd grade and was taught the 5-7-5 rule. Of course in second grade we are also learning about adding. As adults math lessons remove the true poetry from a poem.
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • vedderwoodvedderwood Posts: 2,029
    thatgirl wrote:
    the point is...fanch is a poet and he doesnt even know it!

    I second that thatgirl!!!!!!!!
    DC 6/14/98
    NJ 8/28 & 8/29/98
    NJ 9/1 & 9/2/00
    PA 4/28/03
    NJ 7/5 & 7/6/03
    NY 7/8/03
    PA 7/12/03
    PA 10/1/04
    DC 10/11/04
    NJ 9/30 & 10/1/05
    PA 10/3/05
    NJ 5/27 & 5/28/06
    DC 5/30/06
    NJ 6/1 & 6/3/06
    WA 7/22 & 7/23/06
    IL 8/5/07
    NJ 6/19 & 6/20/08
    DC 6/22/08
    NY 6/24 & 6/25/08
    NY 7/1/08
    PA 10/27, 10/28, 10/30 & 10/31/09
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    I wish I could show you all where I get my information. I also wish we could be in the same place and write about the same moment. Then we can move away from right or wrong, and instead discuss the beauty of a poetry form. The books I've looked to for information are as follows:

    Writing and Enjoying Haiku: A Hands on Guide (Paperback)
    by Jane Reichhold
    The Haiku Handbook - William J. Higginson
    Haiku World, An International Poetry Almanac - William J. Higginson
    Chiyo-Ni: Woman Haiku Master (Paperback)
    edited by Patricia Donegan, Yoshie Ishibashi

    These are the ones I mostly use. Now, one of a few other haiku authors that I read, and who seems to be of the 5-7-5 mindset, is Reginald Horace Blyth. He is one of the BIG WIGs who brought haiku to the English language.

    There are many books out there, which is very cool. Kerouac is hit or miss in his book. I don't think he really understood what was going on in a haiku.

    Starting in January I'll create a haiku thread for Saijiki or seasonal words so we can create our own almanac to share. That would be fun. :)


    Oh, yes, and nice poem, fanch75! You certainly inspired discussion, eh?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • my2handsmy2hands Posts: 17,117
    what kind of poetry doesnt rhyme?


    i prefer the old jack and jill went up a hill
  • Brisk.Brisk. Posts: 11,561
    vedderwood wrote:
    I second that thatgirl!!!!!!!!

    i 3rd that he is good poet
  • fanch75fanch75 Posts: 3,734
    Look at all these women getting all crazy over me because of my gift with words
    Do you remember Rock & Roll Radio?
  • chromiamchromiam Posts: 4,114
    fanch75 wrote:
    Look at all these women getting all crazy over me because of my gift with words

    Keep it up and you may catch up to matt in a few years...
    This is your notice that there is a problem with your signature. Please remove it.

    Admin

    Social awareness does not equal political activism!

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  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    miss haiku don't need to quote no dang references...
    she IS haiku (well, here anyway ~ elsewhere she could be sonnet, or bibliography, or somesuch... we know it not)

    however


    haiku... i write it by the 5-7-5 rule, just cuz i want the challenge
    and also because i'm a mouse with no independence, lol

    did i just type that out seen?


    shizzo... busted!


    fanchy... the poem rocks :) and sam is a sweetie, ain't he?
  • i love this poem

    a few years ago my friends and i got together and everyone picked which characters from loftr they'd be -- i said undoubtedly, i am sam.

    that's neat and a fun exercise, who u r . . . in loftr
  • fanch75fanch75 Posts: 3,734
    are you serious (about loving this "haiku")?
    Do you remember Rock & Roll Radio?
  • of course, i am sam :) sort of

    "Samwise Gamgee (T.A. 2983-F.A. 62; S.R. 1383-1482), a fictional character featured in J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy world Middle-earth, is Frodo Baggins' servant who proves to be the most loyal of the Fellowship of the Ring. A gardener by trade, Sam seems to be a simple Hobbit of plain speech. However, his love for Elves, his gift for poetry, and his belief that the world contains greater wonders than most hobbits are aware of . . ."

    and a just so everyone knows, sam gamgee was a real person!! just like the hobbits, tolkien received a letter from him one day -- isn't that neat!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Gamgee
  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    fanch75 wrote:
    Look at all these women getting all crazy over me because of my gift with words

    You said "sword" and "ring". Drives 'em wild.
  • Ms. HaikuMs. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,265
    You said "sword" and "ring". Drives 'em wild.
    I don't think the stone hit you, you funny man. You're wit's in full swing, there, Fins. :)
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    Oh, I'm getting better. It's the stone that's in intensive care, no-one ever asks about the stone .... :)
  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    You said "sword" and "ring". Drives 'em wild.


    he said "raise" and "cloak" too ;)
  • Heh, heh, I'm always up for a good sword raising. :p


    Hey Finsy, how's the stone??? :D I mean, obviously you're fairing well, you're witty and chatty and all but the stone, sheesh, man, haven't heard a bloody peep and I bet hitting your hard heard, well, my goodness, that could crack the hardest of rocks! ;):p I'm glad you're getting better!!! :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • fanch75fanch75 Posts: 3,734
    I can't get over how awesome this Haiku is.
    Do you remember Rock & Roll Radio?
  • fanch75fanch75 Posts: 3,734
    Bump, in honor of thatgirl's poetry thread.

    This is the ultimate Haiku. It's so ultimate, that it's not a Haiku, but it is a Haiku.
    Do you remember Rock & Roll Radio?
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