Villanelle

Barroom Hero

That Night

I beheld you that night
When you spoke unending:
An adorable sight.

When you told of your love, white
As swan and always spending,
I beheld you that night.

When you gazed long at my fright,
Noticed my heart mending;
You were an adorable sight.

I became lost in your might,
Two hearts in love, ascending!
I beheld you that night.

If you loved me at first sight,
Surely I would be extending
To you, an adorable sight.

But, expecting love is never right,
Its nature impedes our hearts’ blending
Still - I beheld you that night -
An adorable sight.

grooveamatic

Not bad, considering how tough these things are. Regardless, I'm a stickler for form (when someone uses form, anyway) and your "Still" in the next-to-last line ruins it for me a bit.

All in all though, well done. These things are killers.

ISN

barroom hero, I like this.....no angst....jus plain old happy love.....:)