Home› Poetry, Prose, Music & Art

After Morning Coffee

trappedinmyradiotrappedinmyradio Posts: 1,189
edited July 2005 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
Maybe when night falls...
and the rain stops...
or when a tree dies-
it might be sometime
after morning coffee-
that I'll stop loving you

The shower was on and
through the steam I saw
something new, something
altogether beautiful-a
house with no windows
and a beach with no sea.
I'll dig a tunnel
from my window to yours
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • grooveamaticgrooveamatic Posts: 1,374
    This last stanza is amazing. Completely and truly.

    The second stanza is the only slightly weak point, but the last stanza is honestly one of the best things I've ever read on here.
    .........................................................................
  • trappedinmyradiotrappedinmyradio Posts: 1,189
    grooveamatic wrote:
    This last stanza is amazing. Completely and truly.

    The second stanza is the only slightly weak point, but the last stanza is honestly one of the best things I've ever read on here.

    i've sort of always thought that - i've read it starting with the second stanza and eliminating the first...and eliminating the second and just reading the first and third...i like the former "edit" better...but what do i know? or, maybe switching the first and second stanzas - or maybe just deleting it and starting over. ah i never know what to do.
    I'll dig a tunnel
    from my window to yours
  • grooveamaticgrooveamatic Posts: 1,374
    I think it reads amazingly without the second stanza.
    .........................................................................
  • trappedinmyradiotrappedinmyradio Posts: 1,189
    grooveamatic wrote:
    I think it reads amazingly without the second stanza.

    there you go - it's your show...seems you're the only reading anyway :) thank you.
    I'll dig a tunnel
    from my window to yours
  • grooveamaticgrooveamatic Posts: 1,374
    wow...you didn't have to go changing it....but really, I think it's such a better poem like this. I am an honest fan. Thanks for this poem. (others'll read it...sometimes this board moves slowly)
    .........................................................................
  • jamjamjamjam Posts: 491
    I read it both ways and it's a really good poem either way. Hope you're doing well.:)
  • trappedinmyradiotrappedinmyradio Posts: 1,189
    jamjam wrote:
    I read it both ways and it's a really good poem either way. Hope you're doing well.:)

    thanks - things are going well...how are you?
    I'll dig a tunnel
    from my window to yours
  • Being EnlightenedBeing Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    This is one of those poems that you just have to keep reading, in my opinion. I think it can be interpreted differently each time you look at it and that's what I really like about it! :)
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • bossman3188bossman3188 Posts: 263
    This is quite possibly the best thing i have ever read... anywhere.

    thank you for writing these words down.
    there'll be time for laughin'
    there's no time to cry
    soon i will be leavin'
    look me in the eye
    no matter what's in front of me
    it's your face that i'll see
  • trappedinmyradiotrappedinmyradio Posts: 1,189
    bossman3188 wrote:
    This is quite possibly the best thing i have ever read... anywhere.

    thank you for writing these words down.
    Being Enlightened wrote:
    This is one of those poems that you just have to keep reading, in my opinion. I think it can be interpreted differently each time you look at it and that's what I really like about it! :)


    wow, thank you, so very much...both of these mean so much to me.
    I'll dig a tunnel
    from my window to yours
Sign In or Register to comment.