ectasy and agony

A Surprise Left

why do i feel this way?
the pats on the back
don't make me feel any better
after i proved myself a man
why do i still want to swim
in your fountain of salt-drenched tears?

patience was my only virtue
coveted your curves
like david i took that which was not mine
i'm in a war
if it feels good do it
ignored your pleas saying no
i could see the smile in your eyes

blood and water spilt today
after that thrust into your side
he will surely take my life
your screams linger in my ears
silence has forsaken my soul
as i remember my heart beating out of control

i waited and you never arrived
i can see you wallowing in the mud
with the pigs
oh the bad boys are chosen
so what about me?

do i wait for you to take the water from my well
to see the pitter patter of feet
like a lion do i hunt you down?
inhibition the flavour of the season
i don't want your empathy
can i get some cheese with this whine?

so now i kiss you goodbye?
i hope we never meet
am i destined to be alone?
don't tell me we'll just be friends