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Big as a

justamjustam Posts: 21,412
edited November 2006 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
Big as a tennis ball bouncing on my windshield
it was quite tangerine-colored tonight
on the curved road, I kept it in view
My Moon, an unfamiliar neon orange light
warily I watched it, moving with me
but truly it was citrus and bright
was it the clock change?
more pollution this night?
I couldn't be certain, but so soon after
Halloween, it looked about right
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Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    Pity this one has escaped attention! I like the tennis ball simile. Any way of re-introducing it at the end of the poem again, somehow? It'd give the poem a nice spherical structure, to complement the theme. :)
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    FinsburyParkCarrots wrote:
    Pity this one has escaped attention! I like the tennis ball simile. Any way of re-introducing it at the end of the poem again, somehow? It'd give the poem a nice spherical structure, to complement the theme. :)

    What a good idea! :)

    Thanks for noticing this. I've never seen a moon like that before, it almost didn't seem real.
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  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    There was a big fat moon the other night. I was trying to shine up a searchlight image onto it, a Vote Democrat sign, as a bit of subliminal advertisin'. :D

    I love that Dylan line, "That big fat moon is gonna shine like a spoon". The rhyme's so simple and childlike, yet ingenious too!
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    FinsburyParkCarrots wrote:

    I love that Dylan line, "That big fat moon is gonna shine like a spoon". The rhyme's so simple and childlike, yet ingenious too!

    Yeah. I wish my simplicity sounded as good as his does. :p:D
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  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    justam wrote:
    Yeah. I wish my simplicity sounded as good as his does. :p:D


    Oh no, you're sophisticated, woman! I don't know any other concert pianists around here! :p:)
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Thanks dear. :) *kisses*
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