Here's another classic poem/song from me

pearlzepfan

If you're lost and you don't think you can make it anymore
What good are you if you can't stand tall on your own
You fought in the battle but lost in the end
You refuse to get up and try it again
You've given all you had but it's not enough
You claim it went over you that it's all too much
All you can do is wallow in shame
But you've only got yourself to blame

When darkness has come at night you're too scared to sleep
You'll think to yourself that you're the only person that you need
You've been on your own for far too long
Wondering where everybody has gone
They left you out there alone on the street
Now you don't have anybody to meet
You haven't spoken a word in years you've forgotten your name
But you've only got yourself to blame

You'll fall farther into the hole that you've dug for yourself
You can call out but there won't be anyone there to help
Her beauty is on the inside
She just has to open her eyes
And believe that she is a queen
And everything she's always wanted to be
You just have to stop playing these childish games
You've only got yourself to blame

It's too dark to see the road you are walking down
So you build a home now you're not lost you are found
There's only silence in your head
So you just lie there in your bed
And fade away into the night
Try and convince yourself it'll be alright
The ghost in your face is driving you insane
But you've only got yourself to blame

Not everything in life is always as bad as it seems
The only thing that keeps you going are your hopes and dreams
You're not the only one who feels this way
There's too many people who feel it everyday
They say that they'll get up but they won't
Who think that they know everything but they don't
Everyone is always so afraid of change
But you've only got yourself to blame

twin2

I really like this one. Very well written.

twin1

This is very good, I like this one alot.

trappedinmyradio

there are some really great back and forths here - what i mean: two lines...when you write this stuff, do you have music in your head and write to that music - or do you have the words and work on music after that?

pearlzepfan

Well what I do is the first line will just come to me and I'll write that down and then I'll put chords on my guitar to it and keep building from there. Usually I'll write a line at a time and then put chords to it then move on to the next line. The only thing I don't like in the song is the part where it goes "Her beauty is on the inside, she just has to open her eyes, and believe that she's a queen, and everything she's always wanted to be, you just have to stop playing these childish games" cuz to me that kind of narrows it down to it being a break up song about a girl, and I really didn't want that. So I might have to go back and change those lines. And I should add this song took me longer to write than any other song I've written.

I mean, would you listen to this song if someone sung it?

trappedinmyradio

pearlzepfan wrote:

Well what I do is the first line will just come to me and I'll write that down and then I'll put chords on my guitar to it and keep building from there. Usually I'll write a line at a time and then put chords to it then move on to the next line. The only thing I don't like in the song is the part where it goes "Her beauty is on the inside, she just has to open her eyes, and believe that she's a queen, and everything she's always wanted to be, you just have to stop playing these childish games" cuz to me that kind of narrows it down to it being a break up song about a girl, and I really didn't want that. So I might have to go back and change those lines. And I should add this song took me longer to write than any other song I've written.

I mean, would you listen to this song if someone sung it?

it don't know - i said before that a lot of lines can be twisted to fit a melody - so rhythm doesn't play as big of a factor as something that you just read - but, this one would be interesting to hear - i would listen to this...whether i would like it or not - i don't know...you have a recording i can hear?

pearlzepfan

Ok, I made a recording of the song just for you trappedinmyradio. Forgive my voice. I know I'm a horrible singer. And I only could record it from my mp3 player so it's not great great sounding but you can easily hear it fine. I've never put a recording online. I'm kind of nervous about it to be honest

http://s19.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=1PPAMF616TC8G1OW0BHX5ZQR63

trappedinmyradio

pearlzepfan wrote:

Ok, I made a recording of the song just for you trappedinmyradio. Forgive my voice. I know I'm a horrible singer. And I only could record it from my mp3 player so it's not great great sounding but you can easily hear it fine. I've never put a recording online. I'm kind of nervous about it to be honest

http://s19.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=1PPAMF616TC8G1OW0BHX5ZQR63

hey, cool - i like it - it's very lo-fi, but, of course, it is...thanks for putting that out there. your voice isn't bad. right now, though, as you know, it's the words that are holding it up as opposed to the arrangement...but, that can be expected.