Dear Dad, August is for you

VEDHEAD27

You wrote me a letter once
asking that I please never forget you
while there's no way that's possible
I also cannot bring myself to fully accept
that you are gone
If I were to think about it everyday
my heart would cave in
sorrow would be my end

It's August
and I can't deny you
Your month
Your birthday
the month you left this world
for reasons still unknown

How could you be taken away?
I ask myself this every single day
I listen to Nothing As It Seems
and think of you
You loved this song
I remember the excitement in your voice
when you heard it on the radio before it had ever hit my ears
the glow in your face
in that moment
in every moment
you always glowed

You made life your mission
to make others glow
and you succeeded
more than you'll ever know
I can't make sense of this
You would have been 55
55 and full of life
dreaming huge
loving huge
living huge

All you wanted was to share
to give
a heart so big
you filled it with every life you came in contact with
you collected smiles
and spread them across the sky


Why did you have to die?
to leave?
I miss you every second
Not just my dad, my friend
it hurts too much to face
I hide the pain
deep within my soul
a place only you can reach

I know you're still here
in a different form
but the silence breaks my heart
your voice
your laugh
I feel so lost without it


August is the month
I can't understand as hard as I try
what I would give for one more day

Holding onto to everything I have
I will always remember you with a smile
that's what you gave
that's the way you would have wanted it

It will never stop hurting
I will never stop crying
August it when I have the hardest time trying

Your love and life
have made me the person I am today
I look at up the sky and see you there
feel you there
everywhere

Thank you

ACCBootlegGoddess

Thats beautiful Lydi!!! ((Hugs)) I feel exactly the same way about my dad. It made me cry. I think your dad would be really proud of you sweetie...of how you've gone on in his absence, and of the woman that you are. You are a remarkable person and I'm proud to be your friend. Love ya girl! ((hugs))

VEDHEAD27

Aww! Thanks Mel. I know you understand more than anyone. Your response just made me cry. :(

*HUGS*

I was just sitting here listening to NOTHING AS IT SEEMS and had to come get this out. I really want to share with the entire world how much this man meant to this universe. I try my best to share that through my existence alone.

Anyways, thanks again. Love you too!

eden

VEDHEAD27 wrote:

You wrote me a letter once
asking that I please never forget you
while there's no way that's possible
I also cannot bring myself to fully accept
that you are gone
If I were to think about it everyday
my heart would cave in
sorrow would be my end

It's August
and I can't deny you
Your month
Your birthday
the month you left this world
for reasons still unknown

How could you be taken away?
I ask myself this every single day
I listen to Nothing As It Seems
and think of you
You loved this song
I remember the excitement in your voice
when you heard it on the radio before it had ever hit my ears
the glow in your face
in that moment
in every moment
you always glowed

You made life your mission
to make others glow
and you succeeded
more than you'll ever know
I can't make sense of this
You would have been 55
55 and full of life
dreaming huge
loving huge
living huge

All you wanted was to share
to give
a heart so big
you filled it with every life you came in contact with
you collected smiles
and spread them across the sky


Why did you have to die?
to leave?
I miss you every second
Not just my dad, my friend
it hurts too much to face
I hide the pain
deep within my soul
a place only you can reach

I know you're still here
in a different form
but the silence breaks my heart
your voice
your laugh
I feel so lost without it


August is the month
I can't understand as hard as I try
what I would give for one more day

Holding onto to everything I have
I will always remember you with a smile
that's what you gave
that's the way you would have wanted it

It will never stop hurting
I will never stop crying
August it when I have the hardest time trying

Your love and life
have made me the person I am today
I look at up the sky and see you there
feel you there
everywhere

Thank you

Im so sorry.
Thanks for sharing your feelings.

VEDHEAD27

Thanks very much eden. And you're welcome...I really want to share this. It definitely helps.

MeddleDeal

Awww Lydi, that is such a beautiful poem, and I know for sure that your dad would be SO proud of you:) *HUGS* Your dad will always be there, in every being of life around you...from the trees to even the smallest of animals...his presense will ALWAYS be there to let you know that he is there w/you:)

Much love to you my sister.

*HUGE HUGS*

PJaddicted

That is just beautiful!!! Thank you for sharing it. I lost my Dad in January~I know now that I will never "get over it" as some seem to think you do....I will learn to live with it one day at a time.

(((HUGS))) to you!

oxc

jammergurl

Lydi,

I am so sorry that you had to go through that....August is a bad month for me as well. My best friend died 08.08.98 in a horrible car accident and my grandfather who was more of a father to me than my real dad died 08.18.02. I just found out tonight that my real father in Colorado is in the hospital with severe chest pain and they are keeping him overnight. He had a couple heart attacks several months ago and had surgery, but he is supposed to be on medication....he told me that he hadn't been taking it for 2 weeks, but I found out from my mom that it has actually been 2 months due to lack of finances....If I could do anything, I would make August not even exist....so sorry. I understand your pain. Your loved ones are always with you in spirit...know that.

VEDHEAD27

Aww you guys!!

*hugs everyone*

The comfort and understanding here is truely overwhelming and very, very touching.


Thank you so much Nadi. *HUGS* Very beautiful what you said and I feel the same. It's just hard to see that sometimes.


PJaddicted...thanks for your kind words. I am very sorry for your loss and completely understand, this isn't something you will EVER "get over". Taking it one day at a time is really all you can do. I try my best to just focus on ALL THAT I HAD ya know? Some people go their whole life without having an amazing connection with a parent. I do feel blessed for all the years I had and try not to focus too much on the ones that I won't. It isn't easy though, that's for damn sure. Like I said in the poem, if we were to focus on that we would just waste away and pretty much lead a dead, hollow existence ourselves. That's not what these people would have wanted. All we can do is go on an try to make them proud...cherish all those memories like they were yesterday.


jammergurl....I am very sorry for your losses as well. That brought tears to my eyes girl. Also, I hope your father pulls out of this. **super hugs** Ouch, and I can so relate to the medicine deal. My dad never had ANY heart problems his entire life and ironically a spontaneous heart problem is what led to his untimely death. They still don't know what did it to this day but he had been prescribed high blood pressure pills but never took them. :( Doctors said it may not have made a difference....but then again, it might have. Guess we'll never know. :(

"August it the month
I can't understand as hard as I try"

I'm glad we can atleast offer comfort to each other. It helps feeling that you're not alone in this. Our loved ones definitely live in our spirit....they ARE our spirits. I'm grateful for that.

Woooow so much emotion in this thread. It's beautiful though.

Thanks again guys.

ISN

August is a tough month for me too, my father died August 5 years ago.....I don't dream about him as much as I used to, and I'm worried that I'm losing the connection......he was a really great man......and I miss him.......so I understand the whole August thing.....