trying on

Schlitz

See what I have and listen
Good life and good things
Means nothing to anyone
To one person it does
That person isn’t alive
Me

You ask then why is she typing
I thought she was dead
Confusion yes?
I am dammit…
Me

I like mirrors that surround
You look anyway and see all
So many quick turns of the head
But then the one look straight into the depth
Me

That’s when I put my hands out
Grasping the mirror
Straight ahead into those eyes
Deep breath
It’s just you
Me…

rarghrargh-brownstar

very inspiring with ur words, by making "me" become aware and "feel" whats really there
and very moving with ur honest ways
thanks once again
give us more

of_the_girl

I liked the way this piece almost felt like a conversation.... like I was hearing two people talking to each other, only not two people, just you...

The way this piece flows as something so comfortable, simplistic, and clear just really is refreshing. I like the way you structured this one, and the way you chose your words.

Very good, Schlitzy.

{{HUGS}}

Kwyjibo

hey that was really good, really original
*looks around*
nice
I've found the secret thread of the pretty ladies

of_the_girl

Originally posted by Kwyjibo
hey that was really good, really original
*looks around*
nice
I've found the secret thread of the pretty ladies

who's_pearljam?

I like that, Schlitz
It's so real sounding, and nice to read. I can just see you at the mirrors. I want to yell out from the distance:
"You are alive!!":D