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Deep Thoughts

KatKat Posts: 4,872
edited December 2008 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
If you're an ant,
and you're walking along
across the top of a cup of pudding,
you probably have no idea
that the only thing between you
and disaster is the strength
of that pudding skin.

--Jack Handey
Falling down,...not staying down
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • brain of cbrain of c Posts: 5,213
    in too deep kat!!!!! :)
    d'oh!!!!!!

    http://www.myspace.com/brain_of_c
  • Sharon_Hearts_PJSharon_Hearts_PJ Posts: 1,383
    Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
    *Rock and/or Roll!*
  • Imagine8Imagine8 Posts: 10
    Dad always thought laughter
    was the best medicine,
    which, I guess, is why
    several of us died of tuberculosis.

    -Jack Handey
    "It's already been sung, but it can't be said enough..'ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE' "
  • viggs20viggs20 Posts: 1,296
    "A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."

    "The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw."

    "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it."
    "Reality continues to ruin my life." - Calvin & Hobbes.

    www.stopglobalaids.com www.indymedia.org www.ecologyfund.com www.thehungersite.com www.amnesty.org www.pratham.org www.icbl.org www.care2.com/click2donate
  • mamasan10mamasan10 Posts: 22
    If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let ‘em go, because, man, they're gone.

    -Jack Handey
    "He's a very strange young man."
    "He's an idiot. It comes from upbringing. His parents are probably idiots, too. Lorraine, you every have a kid that acts that way, I'll disown you."
  • GouletGoulet Posts: 918
    Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

    --Jack Handey
  • Sharon_Hearts_PJSharon_Hearts_PJ Posts: 1,383
    *You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.*

    *Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.*
    *Rock and/or Roll!*
  • setaside2setaside2 Posts: 1,084
    Jack Handey (if that was ever his real name) is a god...

    and it fits that Sharon girl perfectly.

    Thanks for this thread miss Kat.
    I'm stepping in front of the gushing hydrant in a hurricane. I'd like to see the traction I keep.
  • snappybootssnappyboots Posts: 1
    kids love jokes. so one day i told my 7 year old nephew that i would take him to disney world. instead, i drove him to a burned out warehouse and said, "uh oh, disney world burned down." he cried and cried, but deep down i bet he thought it was pretty funny.
    a breath and a scream.
  • Sharon_Hearts_PJSharon_Hearts_PJ Posts: 1,383
    Originally posted by setaside2
    Jack Handey (if that was ever his real name) is a god...

    and it fits that Sharon girl perfectly.

    Thanks for this thread miss Kat.

    huh? what fits?
    duhhh....i don't get it.....lol

    oh, yeah, thanks Kat! i've always dug Jack. glad to see his deep thoughts are not forgotten :)
    *Rock and/or Roll!*
  • citizendickcitizendick Posts: 106
    I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!" - Jack Handy
    "every show is a great show. bitches...." --twolegsyield
  • sultryeveningsultryevening Posts: 522
    do guinea pigs suffer from an inferiority complex when they see big pigs?
    Some people have to have the sultry evenings Cocktails in the blue, red and grey But I like every minute of the day.
    INTER-FUCKING-MISSION!!!
    Newcastle-Riverside 02/22/92!!!
    E.rutherford New Jersey 01/06/06
    Athens -Greece.survived !barely-
    Wembley 18/06/07- no words- just smiles!
  • BhagavadGitaBhagavadGita Posts: 1,748
    Originally posted by Kat
    If you're an ant,
    and you're walking along
    across the top of a cup of pudding,
    you probably have no idea
    that the only thing between you
    and disaster is the strength
    of that pudding skin.

    --Jack Handey

    OH YEA!!
    i love the skin!

    LOL
  • NuclearTreeFrogNuclearTreeFrog Posts: 225
    If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him

    is, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute

    thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did."



    If life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons

    (maybe by shoving them down his throat).


    If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet

    it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading

    a magazine.
    "The sun is shining, but not for me."
  • scarletbegoniasscarletbegonias Posts: 50
    people who say they are bored, are generally people who are bored with themselves.
  • i forgeti forget Posts: 281
    LOL!! These are sooo funny!
    Thanks for sharing!
  • oldermanolderman Posts: 1,765
    how did i ever find this thread? is it real?

    did the ant get to the other side?
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    seems like there isn't much else around here but old threads!
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    i dont really have anything to add. im just seeing if i can add a comment.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    Well... ?
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • BhagavadGitaBhagavadGita Posts: 1,748
    When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
    J. Handey
  • setaside2setaside2 Posts: 1,084
    "I had never eaten dog before, and I didn't intend to start now. 'Just give me some more of the co-pilot,' I said, extending my plate."

    sigh.

    classic.
    I'm stepping in front of the gushing hydrant in a hurricane. I'd like to see the traction I keep.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    What a difference a day can make.
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
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