Home› A Moving Train
Options

"I'M A WHITE AMERICAN!!"

The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
edited January 26 in A Moving Train
Jugger- "Sir...this question is literally just asking if you are Hispanic, Not Hispanic, or you don't wish to provide...."

White American- "Okay this is a good question now, Juggler. So, if I'm Puerto Rican, do I get more perks? Because APPARENTLY, the migrants and immigrants coming across the border are getting more than...."

Juggler- "Sir....the ENTIRE purpose of me asking you these questions is to prove to auditors, in case we ever get audited, that we are NOT giving anyone special treatment or that we are not discriminating against certain kinds of folks. These are not new questions. They have been around for almost fifty years."

White American- "Okay, well I've never had them imposed on me, I'm sorry." --he's had this mortgage since 2005, so he clearly has. "Umm, okay, I'm not a Puerto Rican."

Juggler- "Sir can you just pick one of Hispanic, Not Hispanic or you don't wish to provide?

White American- "I'm  not Hispanic."

Juggler- "Okay, great...now for race or national origin, are you American Indian or Alaskan Native, Asian, Black or African American, Native Hawaiian or other Pacific Islander, White, or you don't wish to provide?"

White American-....a few moments of silence...."I'M NONE OF THOSE! Ummm....I ah, okay....umm, what would you....well I don't know what I'd be considered at this point! I mean I'm not Indian, I'm not an Alaskan...wow.....Ummm....."

Juggler---repeats the options again

White American-  "White!"

Juggler- "And are you a male or female or you don't wish to provide?"

White American-"I'M A MALE!"
---

And this is after I had to read him, word for word, a three sentence disclaimer explaining why I am about to ask him these questions.

Totally caught me off guard that he didn't have a magawitty retort to my asking his gender. I sell mortgages and come across people like this every single day. They usually are from a southern state and/or have a southern drawl to their voice. And they, like this fucking guy, usually have already offered an unprovoked, largely incorrect, take on the current administration (which is, actually, a nice heads up for me that these incredibly easy three questions for most people are going to become a major challenge for this moron).

Some people get more upset than others. In twenty years of doing this you usually get smart ass responses and I know the questions are annoying but come on. The ONLY people who have issues with it are these people. It is just astounding to me that the idea of banks and lenders trying to do what they can to prove they are not discriminating against certain types of people has now somehow become "woke" to this stupid fucking cult. 





chinese-happy.jpg
Post edited by The Juggler on
«1

Comments

  • Options
    tempo_n_groovetempo_n_groove Posts: 39,124
    Well with all the gender fluidity, people will soon be offended at the options given.

    We get this a lot too w applications.  People opt for the "Not provide" part.

    And 

    Tropic Thunder You People - Imgflip
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    tempo_n_groove said:
    Well with all the gender fluidity, people will soon be offended at the options given.

    We get this a lot too w applications.  People opt for the "Not provide" part.

    And 

    Tropic Thunder You People - Imgflip
    A few years back, during the Trump admin-mind you, they changed the gender question to allow someone to have multiple answers. 

    I cannot tell you how many times I have heard someone say "WELL LAST TIME I CHECKED! HAHAHAHAH!!!!"

    Jerkoff. 
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    lastexitlondonlastexitlondon Posts: 12,187
    It all blows my mind. 
    The internet generation is fucked
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Options
    brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,792
    Scene one, take two:

    Juggler- "Sir can you just pick one of Hispanic, Not Hispanic or you don't wish to provide?"

    White American- "I'm  not Hispanic."

    Juggler- "Okay, great...now for race or national origin, are you American Indian or Alaskan Native, Asian, Black or African American, Native Hawaiian or other Pacific Islander, White, or you don't wish to provide?"

    [After white guy fucks with Juggler for awhile]:
    White American-  "White!"

    Juggler:  "OK, sir great.  But couldn't you just have answer those simple questions straight out without the implied racist bullshit?  Besides, I DIDN'T WRITE THE FUCKING FORM, I'm just doing my job."

    White guy:  "Oh...  ahhhhhhhhh [snorts/ farts]."


    Some people are such dicks, Juggler.  You're a brave soul working with these idiots!
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • Options
    SpunkieSpunkie I come from downtown. Posts: 5,733

  • Options
    Glorified KCGlorified KC KCMO Native Posts: 2,511
    edited January 4
    People like that are more than welcome to "proud to be an American" and more than happy to stereotype anyone who doesn't look or speak like they do.  It's funny how butthurt they become when they have to define themselves.

    I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
  • Options
    F Me In The BrainF Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 30,684
    That guy is a childhood friend of mine.  (Who played that character.)
    Awesome guy, very funny.
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • Options
    Glorified KCGlorified KC KCMO Native Posts: 2,511
    F Me In The Brain said:
    That guy is a childhood friend of mine.  (Who played that character.)
    Awesome guy, very funny.
    The guy who played Elaine's boyfriend Derek?  If so, that's awesome.  One of my all-time favorite Seinfeld episodes.

    I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
  • Options
    F Me In The BrainF Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 30,684
    Glorified KC said:
    F Me In The Brain said:
    That guy is a childhood friend of mine.  (Who played that character.)
    Awesome guy, very funny.
    The guy who played Elaine's boyfriend Derek?  If so, that's awesome.  One of my all-time favorite Seinfeld episodes.

    Yep 
    Sammy. 
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • Options
    gimmesometruth27gimmesometruth27 St. Fuckin Louis Posts: 22,185
    F Me In The Brain said:
    Glorified KC said:
    F Me In The Brain said:
    That guy is a childhood friend of mine.  (Who played that character.)
    Awesome guy, very funny.
    The guy who played Elaine's boyfriend Derek?  If so, that's awesome.  One of my all-time favorite Seinfeld episodes.

    Yep 
    Sammy. 
    damn that is awesome! great! great character!

    next time you see him you should ask him to pound on a wall and yell "a yo, turn it down!!!"
    There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.- Hemingway

    "Well, you tell him that I don't talk to suckas."
  • Options
    tbergstbergs Posts: 9,284
    You should have told him your name is Ron Stallworth and kept repeating it through out the conversation so when he tells people about it, eventually someone has to laugh at his dumbass.
    It's a hopeless situation...
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    tbergs said:
    You should have told him your name is Ron Stallworth and kept repeating it through out the conversation so when he tells people about it, eventually someone has to laugh at his dumbass.
    What if I said Ron Swanson instead?
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    Glorified KCGlorified KC KCMO Native Posts: 2,511
    edited January 6
    The Juggler said:
    tbergs said:
    You should have told him your name is Ron Stallworth and kept repeating it through out the conversation so when he tells people about it, eventually someone has to laugh at his dumbass.
    What if I said Ron Swanson instead?

    I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
  • Options
    brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,792
    This thread reminds me of my first semester at San Francisco State in the fall of 1969.  About halfway into the semester, three or four other guys I had met and befriended in the dorms were hanging out in Jim B's room talking about this form we had all been given by the university that we were required to fill out.  A little while later, Jim G., another friend who was this really great guy (and a black dude), came into the room and, as always, very shortly had us all in stitches.  What really topped it off was him saying, "I'm guessing you guys all marked 'Caucasian' where it asks for 'race'.  Not me, man, I checked 'other' and wrote in underneath it, [n-word].  That outta fuck with their heads!"
    God damn, Jim G. was the funniest and coolest guy in the whole bunch.  And the whole dorm was integrated- blacks, whites, Hispanics, Asians, and a few Middle Eastern dudes.  Good times those were!
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • Options
    SpunkieSpunkie I come from downtown. Posts: 5,733
    😀
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    Spunkie said:
    😀
    Now I recognize you. You changed your profile pic!
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    SpunkieSpunkie I come from downtown. Posts: 5,733
    This place needed some beautiful color. I noticed a beautiful blue haired girl lately gorgeous pic as well 😍💕
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    SO.....I spoke with this dope again today as he did not move forward initially. 

    Get this --the reason this maga is not moving forward is he believes Joe Biden, personally, will lower interest rates for everyone in a few months to "make himself look good!" I shit you not. 

    He also said that his limousine business (he's self employed) has been doing so much better recently and that he may not need to refinance at all. 

    Naturally he will not acknowledge the improving economy as part of the reason for his business doing better and, of course, he will never give the current administration's fed reserve credit for successfully taming inflation while not steering us into recession for the rates dropping this year. 

    Why fuck would Biden not have lowered rates two years again you fucking moron?!?!?


    THIS IS WHAT WE ARE DEALING WITH, FOLKS. 40% of this country is batshit crazy and a lost cause. An absolute lost cause.

    I talk to these idiots every single day. It is so exhausting. 
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    mickeyratmickeyrat up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 36,004
    havr your neighbor make you a sandwich...
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    mickeyrat said:
    havr your neighbor make you a sandwich...
    Ha!

    Old school, Mick
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    F Me In The BrainF Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 30,684
    Send a salami to your boy in the jail
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    F Me In The Brain said:
    Send a salami to your boy in the jail
    Wonder how he's doing these days
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    Merkin BallerMerkin Baller Posts: 10,550
    The Juggler said:
    SO.....I spoke with this dope again today as he did not move forward initially. 

    Get this --the reason this maga is not moving forward is he believes Joe Biden, personally, will lower interest rates for everyone in a few months to "make himself look good!" I shit you not. 

    He also said that his limousine business (he's self employed) has been doing so much better recently and that he may not need to refinance at all. 

    Naturally he will not acknowledge the improving economy as part of the reason for his business doing better and, of course, he will never give the current administration's fed reserve credit for successfully taming inflation while not steering us into recession for the rates dropping this year. 

    Why fuck would Biden not have lowered rates two years again you fucking moron?!?!?


    THIS IS WHAT WE ARE DEALING WITH, FOLKS. 40% of this country is batshit crazy and a lost cause. An absolute lost cause.

    I talk to these idiots every single day. It is so exhausting. 
    Funny you should use the term 'lost cause'.... 
  • Options
    Glorified KCGlorified KC KCMO Native Posts: 2,511
    You guys all know that global warming, er climate change is a hoax setup by Joe Biden when he was in the senate...
    I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
  • Options
    brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,792
    Glorified KC said:
    You guys all know that global warming, er climate change is a hoax setup by Joe Biden when he was in the senate...

    Wait a minute.  I thought that was Al Gore who made up global warming, right?  Biden invented the COVID Hoax.  Trump will set the record straight on all that nonsense when he steals the White House and become Donald, Lord of Darkness Part II.
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • Options
    Halifax2TheMaxHalifax2TheMax Posts: 36,709
    brianlux said:
    Glorified KC said:
    You guys all know that global warming, er climate change is a hoax setup by Joe Biden when he was in the senate...

    Wait a minute.  I thought that was Al Gore who made up global warming, right?  Biden invented the COVID Hoax.  Trump will set the record straight on all that nonsense when he steals the White House and become Donald, Lord of Darkness Part II.
    Al Gore caused global warming when he invented the internet. Duh.
    09/15/1998 & 09/16/1998, Mansfield, MA; 08/29/00 08/30/00, Mansfield, MA; 07/02/03, 07/03/03, Mansfield, MA; 09/28/04, 09/29/04, Boston, MA; 09/22/05, Halifax, NS; 05/24/06, 05/25/06, Boston, MA; 07/22/06, 07/23/06, Gorge, WA; 06/27/2008, Hartford; 06/28/08, 06/30/08, Mansfield; 08/18/2009, O2, London, UK; 10/30/09, 10/31/09, Philadelphia, PA; 05/15/10, Hartford, CT; 05/17/10, Boston, MA; 05/20/10, 05/21/10, NY, NY; 06/22/10, Dublin, IRE; 06/23/10, Northern Ireland; 09/03/11, 09/04/11, Alpine Valley, WI; 09/11/11, 09/12/11, Toronto, Ont; 09/14/11, Ottawa, Ont; 09/15/11, Hamilton, Ont; 07/02/2012, Prague, Czech Republic; 07/04/2012 & 07/05/2012, Berlin, Germany; 07/07/2012, Stockholm, Sweden; 09/30/2012, Missoula, MT; 07/16/2013, London, Ont; 07/19/2013, Chicago, IL; 10/15/2013 & 10/16/2013, Worcester, MA; 10/21/2013 & 10/22/2013, Philadelphia, PA; 10/25/2013, Hartford, CT; 11/29/2013, Portland, OR; 11/30/2013, Spokane, WA; 12/04/2013, Vancouver, BC; 12/06/2013, Seattle, WA; 10/03/2014, St. Louis. MO; 10/22/2014, Denver, CO; 10/26/2015, New York, NY; 04/23/2016, New Orleans, LA; 04/28/2016 & 04/29/2016, Philadelphia, PA; 05/01/2016 & 05/02/2016, New York, NY; 05/08/2016, Ottawa, Ont.; 05/10/2016 & 05/12/2016, Toronto, Ont.; 08/05/2016 & 08/07/2016, Boston, MA; 08/20/2016 & 08/22/2016, Chicago, IL; 07/01/2018, Prague, Czech Republic; 07/03/2018, Krakow, Poland; 07/05/2018, Berlin, Germany; 09/02/2018 & 09/04/2018, Boston, MA; 09/08/2022, Toronto, Ont; 09/11/2022, New York, NY; 09/14/2022, Camden, NJ; 09/02/2023, St. Paul, MN;

    Libtardaplorable©. And proud of it.

    Brilliantati©
  • Options
    brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,792
    Halifax2TheMax said:
    brianlux said:
    Glorified KC said:
    You guys all know that global warming, er climate change is a hoax setup by Joe Biden when he was in the senate...

    Wait a minute.  I thought that was Al Gore who made up global warming, right?  Biden invented the COVID Hoax.  Trump will set the record straight on all that nonsense when he steals the White House and become Donald, Lord of Darkness Part II.
    Al Gore caused global warming when he invented the internet. Duh.

    Ahhhh, yes!  Right you are!  And boy, did he stir up some shit with THAT nonsense! 
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • Options
    mickeyratmickeyrat up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 36,004
    The Juggler said:
    F Me In The Brain said:
    Send a salami to your boy in the jail
    Wonder how he's doing these days

    making "grilled" cheese over a hot plate.. .
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • Options
    The JugglerThe Juggler Behind that bush over there. Posts: 47,359
    mickeyrat said:
    The Juggler said:
    F Me In The Brain said:
    Send a salami to your boy in the jail
    Wonder how he's doing these days

    making "grilled" cheese over a hot plate.. .
    THOSE ARE TWO SEPERATE ACQUAINTANCES OF THE JUGGLER!
    chinese-happy.jpg
  • Options
    Glorified KCGlorified KC KCMO Native Posts: 2,511
    Halifax2TheMax said:
    brianlux said:
    Glorified KC said:
    You guys all know that global warming, er climate change is a hoax setup by Joe Biden when he was in the senate...

    Wait a minute.  I thought that was Al Gore who made up global warming, right?  Biden invented the COVID Hoax.  Trump will set the record straight on all that nonsense when he steals the White House and become Donald, Lord of Darkness Part II.
    Al Gore caused global warming when he invented the internet. Duh.
    Shit that's right.  Well then Nancy Pelosi invented AIDS.

    I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
Sign In or Register to comment.