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Daughters first concert question

EddieBetterManEddieBetterMan Posts: 162
in The Porch
Hello 👋 quick question for all you fellow pearl jam concert goers. My daughter just turned 13 and I decided to purchase tix for her, myself and my wife to the PHX show. I was all excited BUT iv gotten some negative responses from some friends/family about her being to young to attend a rock concert (weed, drunk ppl, etc...)  Any thoughts on that is greatly  appreciated 🙂 

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  • vant0037vant0037 Posts: 6,146
    I think she’s 13 and there’s no better way to help her experience life than to do it together.  Also, Pearl Jam shows are filled with a bunch of old ass dads and moms now.   No one smokes or drinks that much.

    take her. If she has questions, tell her what’s happening.  Other than that, enjoy the show.
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  • Cropduster-80Cropduster-80 Posts: 2,034
    edited April 2022
    The fan base has aged.  From what I’ve seen in the past decade it’s no where near at the level that I would be concerned.  1993 (when I was 13)  maybe. Today, not so much 
    Post edited by Cropduster-80 on
  • jefftjefft Posts: 671
    Take her, mine are going this year as well similar ages, they have already been to shows as well no problems.
  • on2legson2legs Posts: 15,409
    You’ll be fine. Have a great time! 😁
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  • I am a patriotI am a patriot Posts: 464
    People are gonna be people. Take her and talk to her if there are questions. Folks drink and do drugs. That's them, not you (perhaps).

    If she's anything like mine, she'll fall asleep before the first encore cuz 'they are classic rock, Dad! Bore-ring!'
  • PoncierPoncier Posts: 17,373
    We took my son to his first concert at 11 (Van Halen). the folks around us were all super cool and thought it was great to see a new generation getting into the music. I suspect you'll get a similar response from the majority of folks at a PJ show.
    The people who get out of hand wasted at shows are generally a small minority, so odds that you encounter that are slim. Weed smell is certainly a possibility, at 13 you can explain that to her easily I assume.
    Have fun.
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  • CarryTheZeroCarryTheZero Posts: 3,110
    My son was 11 at Jack White! Go for it! She’ll love it!
  • 2-feign-reluctance2-feign-reluctance TigerTown, USA Posts: 23,345
    Twice the merch line power!! Yeah!! 
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  • riley540riley540 Denver Colorado Posts: 1,132
    My mom dropped my friend and I off at a Korn show when we were in middle school. And I’m alive to talk about it 🤷🏼‍♂️
  • given2fly23given2fly23 Evanston, IL Posts: 5,940
    As someone who can’t stand people bringing their kids to concerts for either attention or just selfishness, I think 13 is totally fine. I’ve seen people bring babies and toddlers and it really pisses me off (on behalf of the child). That volume, the darkness, the band not even going on until well past the kids’ bedtime, it’s just wrong. That’s my opinion. But at 11 and 13, I think you’re good. 
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  • DeLukinDeLukin Posts: 2,757
    edited April 2022
    given2fly23 said:
    As someone who can’t stand people bringing their kids to concerts for either attention or just selfishness, I think 13 is totally fine. I’ve seen people bring babies and toddlers and it really pisses me off (on behalf of the child). That volume, the darkness, the band not even going on until well past the kids’ bedtime, it’s just wrong. That’s my opinion. But at 11 and 13, I think you’re good. 
    Agree 100% with this. My first show was Ozzy at the Spectrum at age 13 and it was one of the best musical experiences of my life.
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  • parintachin73parintachin73 Posts: 742
    At the end of the day, it’s your family, your kid, and your decision. Don’t let other people decide for you. My daughter is 11 and she’s been to 4 concerts starting when she was 8.  Her first couple we left early when she got tired. At the 3rd one we were upgraded from lawn to 3rd row by some nice event staff. Just be prepared for people smoking weed, probably some drunken behavior, your kid potentially wanting to leave early, and I would definitely bring ear plugs for her. Otherwise have fun, make memories, and I don’t think you’ll have any issues at a PJ show. 
  • thomascbullockthomascbullock Posts: 422
    Based on the title I was expecting this to be a thread about when Daughter was first played live  :)
  • pjhawkspjhawks Posts: 12,676
    given2fly23 said:
    As someone who can’t stand people bringing their kids to concerts for either attention or just selfishness, I think 13 is totally fine. I’ve seen people bring babies and toddlers and it really pisses me off (on behalf of the child). That volume, the darkness, the band not even going on until well past the kids’ bedtime, it’s just wrong. That’s my opinion. But at 11 and 13, I think you’re good. 
    wasn't there someone for the planned 2020 tour on here asking if they could bring a 2 year old?  if my memory serves me correctly it didn't go well.  I'd say 13 is more than fine.
  • bootlegger10bootlegger10 Posts: 16,092
    EddieBetterMan said:
    Hello 👋 quick question for all you fellow pearl jam concert goers. My daughter just turned 13 and I decided to purchase tix for her, myself and my wife to the PHX show. I was all excited BUT iv gotten some negative responses from some friends/family about her being to young to attend a rock concert (weed, drunk ppl, etc...)  Any thoughts on that is greatly  appreciated 🙂 
    The people talking to you and saying she is too young are batshit crazy.   You may like them and have historically valued their opinion, but you need to cut ties with them. Now.  

    Seriously though, a PJ show should be a great experience.  It could be a very different environment but PJ shows are mostly tame as I'm sure you know already.  You may have a discussion about drunk people and such on the way home, but perhaps it will be her asking to get a guitar instead.   She'll be driving a car in 3 years by herself.  She'll be fine at a concert.  
     
  • on2legson2legs Posts: 15,409
    When we bring our kids to a concert and see someone acting stupid, it becomes a teaching moment.  As in… don’t be that guy. 
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  • PureandEasyPureandEasy Posts: 5,815
    I went to my first concert when I was 14 . . .with friends.  Better that a parent is with her to watch over and protect, if necessary, hope it doesn't come to that.  Live music is something everyone should experience and the younger the better.  
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  • melwertmelwert Posts: 14
    I was 13 at my first concert. Def Leppard and Queensryche at the Spectrum. Scalped tickets with my bus driver. It was great. Totally acceptable age for a show if you feel she’d enjoy it. I wish I could bring my 8 year-old, but she’s not quite ready. Never been to a show in Phoenix, but I wouldn’t be worried about Pearl Jam crowds. Most of us have kids now and the responsible people way out-number the clowns. Guy at Wrigley in 2013 had his tween daughter with him. She stuck it out into the early morning hours and we all thought it was awesome. 
  • deadendpdeadendp Northeast Ohio Posts: 10,434
    edited April 2022
    We started taking our daughter at 12. Your daughter is old enough. She'll be okay. Just be honest with her and tell her what she might see. Maybe watch a few via Periscope with her just so she knows. Keep her in front of you. Hold her hand on the way out. 

    The only concert we have taken our daughter to that concerned both my husband and me was Lindsey Stirling. Seemed like a child shopping festival. We tucked K in between us, my husband leading and holding one hand while I grabbed her other hand. Yes, it was that bad. 

    We have taken her to Chris Cornell, Rob Zombie, Korn several times, Spoon, TOP, P!ATD, The Lumineers twice, AIC twice... absolutely everyone was fine except for the crowd Lindsey had. 
    Post edited by deadendp on
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  • PoncierPoncier Posts: 17,373
    parintachin73 said:
    At the end of the day, it’s your family, your kid, and your decision. Don’t let other people decide for you. My daughter is 11 and she’s been to 4 concerts starting when she was 8.  Her first couple we left early when she got tired. At the 3rd one we were upgraded from lawn to 3rd row by some nice event staff. Just be prepared for people smoking weed, probably some drunken behavior, your kid potentially wanting to leave early, and I would definitely bring ear plugs for her. Otherwise have fun, make memories, and I don’t think you’ll have any issues at a PJ show. 
    Absolutely this, or the 3M noise canceling headphones like some construction workers wear if she is overly sensitive to the volume or would have any issue with inserted earplugs.
    That was my son's first question when I asked him if he wanted to go to VH. "Will it be too loud for me?". We bought him the 3M headphones and he was fine and has used them at a bunch of subsequent shows.
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  • kaw753kaw753 Posts: 879
    I am the really drunk guy at Pearl Jam concerts and don't plan to be at Phoenix. You are good to go.
  • LoujoeLoujoe Posts: 10,245
    riley540 said:
    My mom dropped my friend and I off at a Korn show when we were in middle school. And I’m alive to talk about it 🤷🏼‍♂️
    Mom used to dropped me off at CBGBs for Sunday hardcore matinee shows as a kid. I turned out terrible! Great memories of signing a petition to keep a heroin dealer out of jail. In his defense he said he was innocent.  I have a darn story for everything! See you on the ga line someday and you'll run screaming.
  • Cropduster-80Cropduster-80 Posts: 2,034
    The more I think about it (my oldest is 8) and it’s a way tougher conversation driving to a concert/sporting event in pretty much any big city downtown. I know mine hates going to baseball games for that reason as it freaks him out.  What they see inside is way less of an issue than what’s going on outside.  

    So unless your totally trying to shelter your kid, they see worse on a regular basis probably. 
  • 2-feign-reluctance2-feign-reluctance TigerTown, USA Posts: 23,345
    I would only bring my kids if they were genuinely interested in seeing Pearl Jam. Otherwise, see all you Dad’s with daughters at the Kidz Bop arena tour! 
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  • EddieBetterManEddieBetterMan Posts: 162
    Thank you guys, appreciate it! This makes it easier for me to not feel in any nagitive way
  • mpedonempedone 540xxx - Manchester, NH Posts: 1,961
    melwert said:
    I was 13 at my first concert. Def Leppard and Queensryche at the Spectrum. Scalped tickets with my bus driver. It was great. Totally acceptable age for a show if you feel she’d enjoy it. I wish I could bring my 8 year-old, but she’s not quite ready. Never been to a show in Phoenix, but I wouldn’t be worried about Pearl Jam crowds. Most of us have kids now and the responsible people way out-number the clowns. Guy at Wrigley in 2013 had his tween daughter with him. She stuck it out into the early morning hours and we all thought it was awesome. 

    One of my first concerts was the Queensryche "Building Empires" tour, when I was 12, with my sister, her boyfriend, and our mom (who loved Geoff Tate's voice, used to play classical Spanish guitar, and is a bit of a rocker herself).
    "I'm a lucky man, to count on both hands the [shows I've done]. Some folks just have one, others they got none..."

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  • mcgruff10mcgruff10 New Jersey Posts: 28,718
    7th/8th grade is a perfect age to bring them to a concert.  I think I'd be more nervous bringing them to a sporting event.  Have fun!
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  • Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 13,494
    mcgruff10 said:
    7th/8th grade is a perfect age to bring them to a concert.  I think I'd be more nervous bringing them to a sporting event.  Have fun!

    Unbelievable but probably true. 
    13 is fine.  Teach her about ear protection as others have said.  I always bring ear plugs to shows even if they end up in my pocket some of the time.
  • JE224127JE224127 Fairhope, AL Posts: 476
    Glad to see this thread. Taking my 13 year old son to Nashville for his first concert-he has been asking to go with me for a few years now. He knows PJ thru osmosis and he’s heard enough bootlegs to know what to expect from Eddie 🤪. Figured 13 was a good jumping off point and my wife finally consented.
  • CantKeepmedownCantKeepmedown Portland, Maine Posts: 3,057
    She'll be fine. But as someone else said, make sure it's something that she wants to do. Familiarize her with some songs (if not already).  It's a long night for someone who doesn't really know any of the material.

    My wife is a pretty big fan and typically knows 80-90% of what they play. But she always says, "their shows go on forever!!"  :smiley:
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