Emotional Intelligence

How do you think you measure up when it comes to emotional intelligence? I googled a definition and became even more disheartened. Here is what I came across: 
Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and defuse conflict.

According to Daniel Goleman , an American psychologist who helped to popularize emotional intelligence, there are five key elements to it:
  • Self-awareness. 
  • Self-regulation.   
  • Motivation.
  • Empathy.
  • Social skills.
It was so much easier to consider myself emotionally intelligent when I didn't know exactly what the hell that meant. 

Comments

  • dankinddankind I am not your foot. Posts: 20,827
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • hedonisthedonist standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
    I may or may not be emotionally stunted. 
  • JPPJ84JPPJ84 Hamburg, Germany Posts: 3,434
    Are we talking work-me or private-me? That’s two very different people 
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe B+
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • hedonisthedonist standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
    I was actually thinking about this in the shower.

    I'd say I possess all those qualities, though rarely at the same time.  Motivation is usually situational.

    And honestly, social skills aren't really my strong suit :blush:
  • MalrothMalroth broken down chevrolet Posts: 2,483
    Self awareness and Empathy - A
    Motivation - C
    Social Skills - D+
    Self Regulation - Twice a Day
    The worst of times..they don't phase me,
    even if I look and act really crazy.
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    dankind said:
    Use words man. Words. Help us help you.
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    hedonist said:
    I may or may not be emotionally stunted. 
    Emotionally stunted...I know how that feels.
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    JPPJ84 said:
    Are we talking work-me or private-me? That’s two very different people 
    Private-you. Although I'm wondering if anybody likes the at-work version of themselves. 
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    brianlux said:
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe B+
    Did you make a conscious effort to improve in certain areas? Or did the improvement have more to do with life experiences changing your perspective?
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    hedonist said:
    I was actually thinking about this in the shower.

    I'd say I possess all those qualities, though rarely at the same time.  Motivation is usually situational.

    And honestly, social skills aren't really my strong suit :blush:
    I think that is a very honest assessment. Thank you for giving it some thought. I have been doing the same. I feel that motivation is a hard subject. I would much rather ponder empathy and defusing conflict. 
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    edited June 2020
    Malroth said:
    Self awareness and Empathy - A
    Motivation - C
    Social Skills - D+
    Self Regulation - Twice a Day
    Twice a day. :lol:

    Why are people with self-awareness the ones with faulty social skills? There's something extra unfair about that.
    Post edited by OffSheGoes35 on
  • West Coast DreamgirlWest Coast Dreamgirl Posts: 1,819
    edited July 2020
    brianlux said:
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe 
    Lol @brianlux
    My self rated scale would be like:
    • Self-awareness. C
    • Self-regulation.  C
    • Motivation. B
    • Empathy. B
    • Social Skills. B
    Post edited by West Coast Dreamgirl on
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    brianlux said:
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe 
    Lol @brianlux

    "D" might be a generous grade for 25 years ago.  In 1995 I was at the lowest point in my life.  A total wreck.  Lucky to have gotten past all that.  I would say from 2001 to 2002 I was getting "A" marks- I was really motivated after pull myself out of the hell hole that had been my life for a few years. 

    Then I got old and less motivated, LOL. But this place helps keep me on my toes!
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • brianlux said:
    brianlux said:
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe 
    Lol @brianlux

    "D" might be a generous grade for 25 years ago.  In 1995 I was at the lowest point in my life.  A total wreck.  Lucky to have gotten past all that.  I would say from 2001 to 2002 I was getting "A" marks- I was really motivated after pull myself out of the hell hole that had been my life for a few years. 

    Then I got old and less motivated, LOL. But this place helps keep me on my toes! 

    Ah, well I'm pleased to hear that overall things have improved for you @brianlux :)
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    brianlux said:
    brianlux said:
    25 years ago I would give myself a D in this.  Today, B maybe 
    Lol @brianlux

    "D" might be a generous grade for 25 years ago.  In 1995 I was at the lowest point in my life.  A total wreck.  Lucky to have gotten past all that.  I would say from 2001 to 2002 I was getting "A" marks- I was really motivated after pull myself out of the hell hole that had been my life for a few years. 

    Then I got old and less motivated, LOL. But this place helps keep me on my toes! 

    Ah, well I'm pleased to hear that overall things have improved for you @brianlux :)

    Thank you, West Coast Dreamgirl  :smile:
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













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