I'm Skipping Chemo to be in Chicago - Special Request for my Wife at Wrigley -
I am skipping my bi-weekly infusion of immunotherapy to be in Chicago this weekend. When I arrive back home I will go to the hospital the very next day for my treatment. My oncologist told me to have fun and not to sweat missing it, for a couple days.
However, this post is not about me, but my wife.
Late last fall, less than three weeks after losing her mother, after a 7 year battle with the horrors of dementia, I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. I wasn’t sick at all, but one serious symptom reared its ugly head. I acted on that symptom and less than 12 hours and a wake up later, I was told I had a significant mass on a major organ and the scans showed significant metastatic activity. Surgery was scheduled and the cancer source was removed. However, the metastatic activity would need to be monitored, closely.
When my wife asked what I wanted for Xmas I said, “I want to go stare at the ocean, and go see as many bands as we can this summer.” Since I was a kid, the ocean and music were my escapes from reality. That's it, let's go immerse ourselves in some music!
As tour dates were being announced for numerous bands, we began our planning. I honestly had no idea whether I would be able to go, or if I would even be here. But the planning began. Imagine how happy I was when saw that her favorite band would be playing some big stadium shows this summer. I entered the lottery, hoped for a miracle and we won tickets, to both nights, including GA on Monday night.
As spring started turning to summer I started to get gravely ill, not from cancer, but unexpected side effects from the medicines I was on. I was sick, couldn’t keep a thing down, had serious lung and other major organ issues. I was steadfast, we are not changing a thing, onward to our shows. My oncologist knew the only way I would miss any shows was if I was incapacitated, or dead and told my wife that I was not jeopardizing my health more, by going. These trips were too important to her, to us. We went to Red Rocks, twice. We’ve been to Florida, NYC, and all over the northeast. The first trip we went on, was brutally hot and I could barely move, but we managed. She was my rock, put up with the daily hell of me being very sick, but she continued to do everything to make sure it was as good as it could be, for me. At times, it was brutal. I couldn’t eat, breathing was difficult. Her worry for me detracted from her experience, but she never said a word.
We have laughed, we have cried, we have danced, all summer, regardless of my condition. Miraculously, the side effects started to get under control late last month and I have been doing much better. We're extremely excited after the Seattle shows, for the Chicago shows.
My request is a simple one and it’s for her. If “Black” is played this weekend , please dedicate it to my wife, Christine. She’s always said when she hears that song, “I just know he’s singing this to me” For some reason she thinks she has a pass for Eddie from me, but she doesn’t. I don’t know Ed, at all. 
We’re going to try our damnedest to get into GA early Monday so I can get her as close to Eddie and the band as possible. I can’t spend 12-15 hours in line, I’d be out cold by show time, but we can likely go in when the gates open.
My attitude with life is different now, so I won’t sweat the small stuff. I hope we’re surrounded by nothing but people, who realize we’re all in this journey together, like it or not. I’ll be the guy down there weeping if they play “I am Mine” or “Just Breathe” cause those songs hit me very hard. My prognosis isn’t horrible; it’s unknown, which can be cruel as we await the next scan or test. So I will live and cherish the moments I share with all of you, and her.
One thing I tell myself all the time is that I need to put things in perspective and it’s my advice to all of you.
I also tell myself, “I wish I was as fortunate, as fortunate as me” because it could be so much worse.
Thank you all for reading
See you at the ball park!
Comments
Ten Club "Ambassador" (recap-writer) - DEEP.pearljam.com
Contributor & Patron - liveon4legs.com
2018: Chicago 2 (Wrigley Field) 8/20 | 20(20)22: St Louis 9/18 | 2023: Chicago 2 (United Center) 9/7, Indianapolis (Deer Creek) 9/10 | 2024: Vegas 5/16-&-18, Indy? Wrigley 2?
EV:
2018: CURE Benefit Show (Chicago - Navy Pier) 10/15
RIP: Andy, Kurt, Chris
Ten Club "Ambassador" (recap-writer) - DEEP.pearljam.com
Contributor & Patron - liveon4legs.com
2018: Chicago 2 (Wrigley Field) 8/20 | 20(20)22: St Louis 9/18 | 2023: Chicago 2 (United Center) 9/7, Indianapolis (Deer Creek) 9/10 | 2024: Vegas 5/16-&-18, Indy? Wrigley 2?
EV:
2018: CURE Benefit Show (Chicago - Navy Pier) 10/15
RIP: Andy, Kurt, Chris
Same thing just struck me as well!
Yet another thread that reminds me how we are all humans with our own tale to tell.
OP... you sound like you have a great perspective. Good job, man. And good luck with your request.
2009 - Toronto
2010 - Buffalo
2011 - Toronto 1&2
2013 - London, Pittsburgh, Buffalo
2014 - Cincinnati, St. Louis, Detroit
2016 - Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Ottawa, Toronto 1
2018 - Fenway 1&2
2022 - Hamilton, Toronto
2023 - Chicago 1&2
2024 - Las Vegas 1&2
1994 - Bridge School Benefit, Shoreline Mountain View CA
*** 1995 - 2015 High School, College, Broke, Having Kids***
2016 - Temple of the Dog, Bill Graham Civic Center Auditorium, San Francisco CA
2017 - Eddie Vedder, Bourbon and Beyond, Louisville KY
2018 - The Home Shows, Show 2, Seattle WA
2019 - Eddie Vedder, Ohana Fest, Dana Point CA
2020- Oakland Nights 1 and 2
2020 - Ohana Fest
2021 - Ohana Fest
2022 - Oakland 1 and 2
"Watch out for music. It should come with a health warning. It can be dangerous. It can make you feel so alive, so connected to the people around you, and connected to what you really are inside. And it can make you think that the world should, and could, be a much better place. And just occasionally, it can make you very, very happy." -Peter Gabriel
Bump
If losing my shit would accomplish anything, I would. I'm not that proud. But I've found that it never does. Every single one of us has problems, some are easier than others to deal with.
As these dates approached, I honestly could not believe it was happening, I really wondered where I would be today.
So, thank you for the support.
I wish you both well and then some - may you continue to be each other's anchors.
Pearl Jam, Please play Black for Christine!!!!! XOXO
1994 - Bridge School Benefit, Shoreline Mountain View CA
*** 1995 - 2015 High School, College, Broke, Having Kids***
2016 - Temple of the Dog, Bill Graham Civic Center Auditorium, San Francisco CA
2017 - Eddie Vedder, Bourbon and Beyond, Louisville KY
2018 - The Home Shows, Show 2, Seattle WA
2019 - Eddie Vedder, Ohana Fest, Dana Point CA
2020- Oakland Nights 1 and 2
2020 - Ohana Fest
2021 - Ohana Fest
2022 - Oakland 1 and 2
"Watch out for music. It should come with a health warning. It can be dangerous. It can make you feel so alive, so connected to the people around you, and connected to what you really are inside. And it can make you think that the world should, and could, be a much better place. And just occasionally, it can make you very, very happy." -Peter Gabriel
One thing I can let all of you know is that, I can vouch for this guy here... I think I can say that I know him fairly well and I think of him as a cherished friend. Oddly enough, we became friends a handful of years ago through another band’s community and its branched our from there.
He is humble, he is a straight shooter and honestly one of my favorite people but he doesn’t live his struggles out for the world to see. What he’s going through now and has been going through, he doesn’t wear it on his sleeve as he doesn’t want this to overshadow any day or any moment he can enjoy. He keeps much of this battle to himself but that’s how he gets through it.
His love for music is deep... It’s part of what makes up his soul. I was at the Seattle shows last weekend and we were messaging throughout the weekend. He was paying close attention to those shows - we’ve been talk PJ daily for weeks now. He is not lying about being excited for Chicago and having this experience with his wife. This one will be special for them...
I hope they play Black, Ed. For Chris, for you, for the moments it will bring... I especially hope they play it Monday night when you and her are in GA hopefully close to that rail, so she can look up and see Eddie singing it to her. It’s one of those moments that neither of you will forget.
Enjoy your shows, friend. I know they will turn out to be even more than you were ever expecting...
Be well.
Hamburg 2000, Berlin 2006, Copenhagen 2007, Berlin 2009, Berlin 2010, Berlin 1+2 2012, Copenhagen 2012, Amsterdam 1+2 2014, Vienna 2014, Berlin 2014, Prague 2018, Krakow 2018
1994 - Bridge School Benefit, Shoreline Mountain View CA
*** 1995 - 2015 High School, College, Broke, Having Kids***
2016 - Temple of the Dog, Bill Graham Civic Center Auditorium, San Francisco CA
2017 - Eddie Vedder, Bourbon and Beyond, Louisville KY
2018 - The Home Shows, Show 2, Seattle WA
2019 - Eddie Vedder, Ohana Fest, Dana Point CA
2020- Oakland Nights 1 and 2
2020 - Ohana Fest
2021 - Ohana Fest
2022 - Oakland 1 and 2
"Watch out for music. It should come with a health warning. It can be dangerous. It can make you feel so alive, so connected to the people around you, and connected to what you really are inside. And it can make you think that the world should, and could, be a much better place. And just occasionally, it can make you very, very happy." -Peter Gabriel
Let's hear it!
You and your wife are the best!
Bump for Black!!!
Well, today is the day. We’re gonna get soaked, but I don’t care. Been a beautiful 3 days in Chicago, with old and new friends that have made this such a special trip. I can’t thank you all enough, from the bottom of my heart.
Saturday was was just great... I’ll admit “Just Breathe” kicked the shit out of me pretty bad. If “I am Mine” is played tonight, it’ll be hard to remain composed.
See, my wife doesn’t have a clue about this request. She would likely be mad at me. But if anyone can swing her mood, it’s Eddie Vedder. So, I’m not taking it down. I was going to make a sign. She didn’t like it, “because it’s not you”. She’s right. It’s not. So, I’m removing any reference to “I” from it. But I feel like I gotta try.
Again, I appreciate the support, stated or not.