Song of the day(Once)
JDE-PJ
Posts: 721
A new board means bringing some old memories and friends to a whole new set of people.
Saying all this, beginning now, I will be posting the songs of the day, beginning with Once, and going through all the song posts that I had saved on the old, old board on floppy.
I hope you all enjoy these, we first started this 4 years ago, so many of these names are no longer around, but I look foward to all of you, adding some new interpretations and comments to these posts.
First up as I said is the first ever song this band put out on an album, a little ditty called Once!
RrVwMirror
1/12/01 7:30 PM
SOTD: ONCE
El Conquistador
8/3/99 10:14 AM
Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
In case you missed it we are going to get a song a day that is open to pick apart and share your translation with everyone. This is day 1...let's make this thing good!!!!! Here are the lyrics:
once
I admit it...what's to say...yeah...
I'll relive it...without pain...mmm...
Backstreet lover on the side of the road
I got a bomb in my temple that is gonna explode
I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah...
Oh, try and mimic what's insane...ooh, yeah...
I am in it...where do I stand?
Oh, Indian summer and I hate the heat
I got a backstreet lover on the passenger seat
I got my hand in my pocket, so determined, discreet...I pray...
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah...
You think I got my eyes closed
But I'm lookin' at you the whole fuckin' time...
Ooh, once upon a time I could control myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once, upon a time I could love myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could love you, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once (4x)
Yeah...once, once...yeah, yeah...
Yeah...yeah, yeah...yeah, yeah...oww...
Quarterman
8/3/99 10:18 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Not very deep, but seems like someone's got a prostitute with him and he is tempted to kill her...wishes he could control himself, maybe he's done something like this before...
We all know this is part of the trilogy along with Footsteps and Alive...I think the song goes to show that his childhood really mucked him up and he has violent tendencies...
Quarterman
8/3/99 10:18 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Not very deep, but seems like someone's got a prostitute with him and he is tempted to kill her...wishes he could control himself, maybe he's done something like this before...
evolution10
8/3/99 10:23 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I see it as a total repression of anger,hate,love gone wrong and the world becoming to much so that he's losing his mind and becoming totally crazy.
El Conquistador
8/3/99 10:25 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
once
I admit it...what's to say...yeah...
I'll relive it...without pain...mmm...
There is something going on in this guy's life that
has really hurt him, but he has become numb to the pain.
Backstreet lover on the side of the road
I got a bomb in my temple that is gonna explode
I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
He is picking up a prostitute because he has to deal with
his problem somehow, but he doesn't know how. His anger is
building up and he is thinking about killing her.
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah...
He used to feel normal...he used to feel in control.
Oh, try and mimic what's insane...ooh, yeah...
I am in it...where do I stand?
Oh, Indian summer and I hate the heat
I got a backstreet lover on the passenger seat
I got my hand in my pocket, so determined, discreet...I pray...
He is trying to hold back, but he feels he must do it now.
He is reaching for the gun, and the anger and tention is bulding....
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah...
You think I got my eyes closed
But I'm lookin' at you the whole fuckin' time...
The prostitute has no clue what is coming, the anger has gotten
to a point of no return...he is ready to do it.
Ooh, once upon a time I could control myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once, upon a time I could love myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could love you, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once (4x)
Yeah...once, once...yeah, yeah...
Yeah...yeah, yeah...yeah, yeah...oww...
As we all know this is part of the mini opera.... The story in Alive
is what has driven him to this, then the story in footsteps is the aftermath.
kmj
8/3/99 10:33 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I've always imagined this as taking place in a police interrogation or something similar - confessing his crimes,
jumping into flashbacks and "self-assessment" of what he did, telling his story in a very cocky, "here's what I said.."
kind of way (like the line "...think I got my eyes closed...").
kj
jcborges
8/3/99 10:58 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
OK, this is important because it's one of the few times that Pearl Jam has actually given us some insight on a song. There is a widespread recording of one of their shows (I believe it appears on the 'Five Alive' bootleg, among others), where Eddie explains that the three songs Alive/once/Footsteps make up a mini-opera, and that Footsteps (Act 3) takes place in a jail.
So, for 'once' ;-) it is relatively safe to make some assumptions about the context of the song:
1 - The character in the song has suffered child trauma and it has made him violent and alienated
2 - He eventually kills someone and ends up in jail for it.
Now extrapolating:
I believe that in 'once' he has already killed the girl (who was "ready for him" in "Alive" and then he couldn't "remember anything from this very day"). Something about her triggered his violent behaviour and now he is trying to come to terms with what he has done.
However, I believe the dominant feeling in the song is not regret for the crime, but for the fact that he has just wasted his life. What he expresses is the feeling of fake invincibleness that comes with the despair and the realization that he has nothing more to lose.
'Alive' has often been characterized as being about Vedder himself, and Eddie not so long ago said in an interview that he inevitably often writes in the 1st person, and then shiftes it to something more impersonal. I always had the feeling that this trilogy is about what Vedder thought could had happened to him, if he hadn't renounced the self-pity and found a way of catharsis. The resolution of this conflict is further put into perspective in 'Present Tense'.
This is a dark song, embebbed with a powerful rage and revolt, like so many in Ten, a song of despair. I love it for its huge charge of emotion, but it always leaves me sort of suffocated.
Comments?
<b><i>João da Câmara Borges</b></i>
Quarterman
8/3/99 11:07 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Excellent critique, but I have a few descrepencies...In Alive, the woman who approaches the child is the child's mother...the mother is fascinated with the child because he looks so much like his dead father...she comes on to the child or whatever and obviously this is sexual abuse...I think in once, the prostitute represents his mother who wronged him as a child...his anger leads to violence...so, I don't think the woman in Alive is the same as the whore, because, like I said, the woman in Alive is his mother and he didn't kill his mother...
Another thing, didn't Vedder have a descent relationship with his mother...I don't see the trilogy as being autobiographical at all...
jcborges
8/3/99 11:12 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I never considered the woman in the second part of 'Alive' to be same as in the first (the mother). Your idea of sexual abuse from the mother is very interesting, though, but let's leave it to the discussion on that song...
<b><i>João da Câmara Borges</b></i>
Saying all this, beginning now, I will be posting the songs of the day, beginning with Once, and going through all the song posts that I had saved on the old, old board on floppy.
I hope you all enjoy these, we first started this 4 years ago, so many of these names are no longer around, but I look foward to all of you, adding some new interpretations and comments to these posts.
First up as I said is the first ever song this band put out on an album, a little ditty called Once!
RrVwMirror
1/12/01 7:30 PM
SOTD: ONCE
El Conquistador
8/3/99 10:14 AM
Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
In case you missed it we are going to get a song a day that is open to pick apart and share your translation with everyone. This is day 1...let's make this thing good!!!!! Here are the lyrics:
once
I admit it...what's to say...yeah...
I'll relive it...without pain...mmm...
Backstreet lover on the side of the road
I got a bomb in my temple that is gonna explode
I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah...
Oh, try and mimic what's insane...ooh, yeah...
I am in it...where do I stand?
Oh, Indian summer and I hate the heat
I got a backstreet lover on the passenger seat
I got my hand in my pocket, so determined, discreet...I pray...
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah...
You think I got my eyes closed
But I'm lookin' at you the whole fuckin' time...
Ooh, once upon a time I could control myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once, upon a time I could love myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could love you, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once (4x)
Yeah...once, once...yeah, yeah...
Yeah...yeah, yeah...yeah, yeah...oww...
Quarterman
8/3/99 10:18 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Not very deep, but seems like someone's got a prostitute with him and he is tempted to kill her...wishes he could control himself, maybe he's done something like this before...
We all know this is part of the trilogy along with Footsteps and Alive...I think the song goes to show that his childhood really mucked him up and he has violent tendencies...
Quarterman
8/3/99 10:18 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Not very deep, but seems like someone's got a prostitute with him and he is tempted to kill her...wishes he could control himself, maybe he's done something like this before...
evolution10
8/3/99 10:23 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I see it as a total repression of anger,hate,love gone wrong and the world becoming to much so that he's losing his mind and becoming totally crazy.
El Conquistador
8/3/99 10:25 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
once
I admit it...what's to say...yeah...
I'll relive it...without pain...mmm...
There is something going on in this guy's life that
has really hurt him, but he has become numb to the pain.
Backstreet lover on the side of the road
I got a bomb in my temple that is gonna explode
I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
He is picking up a prostitute because he has to deal with
his problem somehow, but he doesn't know how. His anger is
building up and he is thinking about killing her.
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah...
He used to feel normal...he used to feel in control.
Oh, try and mimic what's insane...ooh, yeah...
I am in it...where do I stand?
Oh, Indian summer and I hate the heat
I got a backstreet lover on the passenger seat
I got my hand in my pocket, so determined, discreet...I pray...
He is trying to hold back, but he feels he must do it now.
He is reaching for the gun, and the anger and tention is bulding....
once upon a time I could control myself
Ooh, once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah...
You think I got my eyes closed
But I'm lookin' at you the whole fuckin' time...
The prostitute has no clue what is coming, the anger has gotten
to a point of no return...he is ready to do it.
Ooh, once upon a time I could control myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once, upon a time I could love myself, yeah...
once upon a time I could love you, yeah, yeah, yeah...
once (4x)
Yeah...once, once...yeah, yeah...
Yeah...yeah, yeah...yeah, yeah...oww...
As we all know this is part of the mini opera.... The story in Alive
is what has driven him to this, then the story in footsteps is the aftermath.
kmj
8/3/99 10:33 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I've always imagined this as taking place in a police interrogation or something similar - confessing his crimes,
jumping into flashbacks and "self-assessment" of what he did, telling his story in a very cocky, "here's what I said.."
kind of way (like the line "...think I got my eyes closed...").
kj
jcborges
8/3/99 10:58 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
OK, this is important because it's one of the few times that Pearl Jam has actually given us some insight on a song. There is a widespread recording of one of their shows (I believe it appears on the 'Five Alive' bootleg, among others), where Eddie explains that the three songs Alive/once/Footsteps make up a mini-opera, and that Footsteps (Act 3) takes place in a jail.
So, for 'once' ;-) it is relatively safe to make some assumptions about the context of the song:
1 - The character in the song has suffered child trauma and it has made him violent and alienated
2 - He eventually kills someone and ends up in jail for it.
Now extrapolating:
I believe that in 'once' he has already killed the girl (who was "ready for him" in "Alive" and then he couldn't "remember anything from this very day"). Something about her triggered his violent behaviour and now he is trying to come to terms with what he has done.
However, I believe the dominant feeling in the song is not regret for the crime, but for the fact that he has just wasted his life. What he expresses is the feeling of fake invincibleness that comes with the despair and the realization that he has nothing more to lose.
'Alive' has often been characterized as being about Vedder himself, and Eddie not so long ago said in an interview that he inevitably often writes in the 1st person, and then shiftes it to something more impersonal. I always had the feeling that this trilogy is about what Vedder thought could had happened to him, if he hadn't renounced the self-pity and found a way of catharsis. The resolution of this conflict is further put into perspective in 'Present Tense'.
This is a dark song, embebbed with a powerful rage and revolt, like so many in Ten, a song of despair. I love it for its huge charge of emotion, but it always leaves me sort of suffocated.
Comments?
<b><i>João da Câmara Borges</b></i>
Quarterman
8/3/99 11:07 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Excellent critique, but I have a few descrepencies...In Alive, the woman who approaches the child is the child's mother...the mother is fascinated with the child because he looks so much like his dead father...she comes on to the child or whatever and obviously this is sexual abuse...I think in once, the prostitute represents his mother who wronged him as a child...his anger leads to violence...so, I don't think the woman in Alive is the same as the whore, because, like I said, the woman in Alive is his mother and he didn't kill his mother...
Another thing, didn't Vedder have a descent relationship with his mother...I don't see the trilogy as being autobiographical at all...
jcborges
8/3/99 11:12 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I never considered the woman in the second part of 'Alive' to be same as in the first (the mother). Your idea of sexual abuse from the mother is very interesting, though, but let's leave it to the discussion on that song...
<b><i>João da Câmara Borges</b></i>
I know someday you will have a beautiful Life
Jason
Jason
Post edited by Unknown User on
0
Comments
8/3/99 11:16 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I don't see any of these as being autobiographical either. It seems to me, like was mentioned before, that Ed took what had happened to him, changed the story and gave it the ending that he felt could have been him....
Yield
8/3/99 11:25 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
All good responses. I have nothing else to add but that i never read the lyrics all the way through and always had a different idea of what it is, but after reading the lyrics, i understand.
kmj
8/3/99 11:33 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I thought I read somewhere that some of once, and the trilogy, was based loosely on real events involving
the "Green River" killer.
kj
brokenarrow
8/3/99 11:38 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
.....Thanks for all of the lyrics....There have always been lines in it that I didn't understand clearly....
...I'm with Yield, I saw it as something similar,but I didn't see her as a prostitute. I saw her as maybe an old girlfriend, someone he loved, but could no longer have.
......Perhaps like a stalker.....but his rage was always fuled by his abnormal childhood, being sexually abused by his mother...and then of course ending up in jail for murder.
......El Conquistidor....you are a genius for thinking this up!!!!!!!!!!
......So many lyrics.....oooooohhhhhhhhh, I have goose bumps...
....Hat's off to you my wee jammer friend! brokenarrow>
PJFan13,586,932
8/3/99 11:42 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I think Yield got that she was a prostitute from the term "backstreet lover." Would you refer to an ex as a backstreet lover, or somebody who you might meet discreetly?
Sar-Juy
8/3/99 11:45 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I think this song is about contradiction in religion. The lyrics, I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
meaning someone thinks that religion is a joke, or one person might say they believe in God, and then go kill someone. Yep Yep, that's my insight!
jeremy black
8/3/99 11:47 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
its a song about murder.
El Conquistador
8/3/99 11:47 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
It very well could just be a old girlfriend, but I think that maybe it is as prostitute because a lot of people that deal with sexual harrasment try to deal with it by any means they can, a lot of the time it leads to meaningless or purchased sex....which I think is the case here. A lot of the time these type of people also feel awful afterwards, which leaves them very confused. Well I think the character in this song has dealt with prostitutes before and feels terrible and dirty for it, so he wants to lash back...and here is his chance...he is going to handle himself the only way he can because of his confused anger... It is definately, in my opinion, a very abused person. "You think I got my eyes closed But I'm lookin' at you the whole fuckin' time..." The prostitute doesn't know what is coming....he feels he needs his retaliation against his sexually abused past....
maybe
Yield
8/3/99 11:54 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
Just to clarify, it was not me who thought she was a prostitute, that was acutally one of the things that I agree with now after seeing all the lyrics, but never believed it before.
brokenarrow
8/3/99 11:55 AM
Re:Backstreet Lover.....
.....I have to agree with you guys.....Prostitute makes more sense.....
.....Now I'll hear that part, and the rest of the song differently when I'm picturing the person who is on the receiving end of his rage.....
......When his eyes are closed, but he pictures her face the whole time...
..I think he sees his Mom's face, (not literally, just in the opera!)....The one who messed him up in the first place............Thanks guys!
cheekywombat
8/3/99 12:00 PM
I agree...
I agree that the underlying theme of this song is violent retaliation for some kind of abuse, either physical, sexual or mental..the character obviously has some deep rooted problems which he seems to realize & struggle with..hense the Title: "once". once there was a time where this individual was able to think & act normally...but not anymore...also: an observation on a possible play on the word "pray". "To Pray" as in pray to God & "To Prey" as in to hunt something down & kill it...& now for my token sillymonkey comment: I think the "Backstreet lover" is a huge poster hanging, pin wearing, top of the lungs screaming Backstreet Boys groupie that he decides to whack!...aah..there's too many of 'em anyway...
Elegant-Waste
8/3/99 12:21 PM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
once obviously is the second song of the trilogy. First is "Alive", the child is mentally screwed up. The second song "once", the child is an adult in which he is a serial killer to deal with the traumas of his child, something do with the Green River killer, and a prositute killer in San Diego (something like that!). The third and final song "Footsteps" is about the killer being exacuted. This is what Ed quoted on the trigology: "based on things that had happened, and some I imagined."
-My My Hey Hey Pearl Jam Is Here To Stay-
Jason
8/3/99 12:51 PM
Re: "Backstreet(boy) lover"!!!!
I like it.. . .Eddie must have foreseen how annoying this group and all the other pseudo groups would become. Now I understand the person in once so much better. . . he could be anyone of us. . . . . . . . . . . A Backstreet Lover Killer
jcborges
8/3/99 2:12 PM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
OK... this is great... I am enjoying this very much, learning a lot, and completing my perspective of the song, which is part of the objectives this forum set out to achieve.
However, I sense something is lacking. No matter how much I like the insights on the context of the song, the story behind it, there's more to it than just doing detective work on the lyrics. Music is art, art is about aesthetics, and aesthetics means EMOTIONS. I still want your interpretations, but what I would also really to know is how it makes you FEEL.
Pearl Jam's music is packed with emotion; I would like to know how you interact with it. Does it make you feel sombre? depressed? blissful? relaxed? how does the flow of emotion shift throughout the song? what are the images that come to your mind? do you relate to it? THAT is the kind of stuff I was hoping to see addressed, in addition to the context of the lyrics. Let's not do like high school teachers do in school, where they dissect a poem, its form, the rhethorics, the construction, the story, and leave out the really important stuff: how people interiorize it.
If the rest of you doesn't feel it's important and worth the try, fine, I'll be happy enough to stick with the interpretations... but I think we'll be missing something...
<b>João da Câmara Borges</b>
"Shower the people you love with love, show them the way you feel"
Bastet
8/3/99 2:17 PM
Re: I agree...
I never thought of it as "I prey". I like that, it makes sense. (not that the rest of you don't make sense, please don't be offended)
=^--^=
Schumi
8/3/99 2:54 PM
I don't know if I agree
Hmmm...I always thought it was back_seat_ lover. You know, you do it with a prostitute in the back of your car, a la Hugh Grant.
Quarterman
8/3/99 3:33 PM
Re: I don't know if I agree
I might have to agree with you, but either way, don't you think it insinuates a prostitute??
Schumi
8/3/99 3:42 PM
Re: I don't know if I agree
Yes, agreed, a prostitute. Although I think to the singer she represents something more (perhaps the abusive mother from Alive, as some have suggested). "once upon a time, I could love you."
RrVwMirror
8/3/99 3:50 PM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I am listening to once as I type, trying to relate how the song makes me feel. I do not relate to this on a personal level, as I do some PJ songs. But I can tell you the mood of this song actually makes me feel agitated. I can almost feel how disturbed this person is. This is probably what makes the song so good, the emotions of the lyrics spill over into the music itself!
PJFan13,586,932
8/3/99 3:53 PM
Re:Once upon a time. . .
That's the how all fairy tales begin. . . .Who was the most common person to tell us our fairy tales as children??? Our mothers!!!!!
Quarterman
8/3/99 4:16 PM
Re: I don't know if I agree
Absolutely...that is exaclty how I see things...he blames the mother, but takes it out on the whore...in Footsteps, as he is on death row, we see how he blames his mother when he says, "If there was a reason, it was you..."
Schumi
8/3/99 4:36 PM
Bingo!
We have a winner. I agree with you completely. I think the trilogy is well done, especially considering the way it came together with Ed just adapting his lyrics to Stone's music. The music and lyrics fit well together and create the right mood for each song, I think.
pearljamgirl
8/3/99 5:37 PM
Re: I like this Post!
I love reading everyone's interpretations of the lyrics and the emotions of the song. I think we are all on the same track with this song. I feel lots of anger on most of the album. I don't necessarily think that this relates to Eddie, just that it was easier for him to write about fiction or other characters than himself. I think in the beginning of Eddie's career, his songs were NOT about him and now that he's more comfortable with his talent, he has the confidence to write about himself and the band's experiences. Although I guess some of his songs may relate to him in some parallel way, but not so literally. I don't know. I was never good at this in English class.
Isabelle
8/3/99 7:54 PM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
When I hear once, it makes me think of someone who is angry, and confused, and scared. Someone who at one time thought they had a grasp on things, but now they don't. It makes me feel and think of the times in my own life, when I thought that my world was turned upside down. Thankfully, I always bounce back.
Isabelle
Isabelle
8/3/99 10:20 PM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
once, makes me think of someone who had at one time, a handle on their life. And it has slipped away. They are angry, confused and scared. Anyway, those are the emotions and thoughts I think of when I hear this song.
Isabelle
Layla
8/4/99 00:23 AM
thanx for the therapy session
well when i listen to once i can relate but not in the
same context. I never even stopped and thought about the
way i listen to once. Sort of singing along, more in my
head-with this feeling...it's like when i am doing something
i don't want to be doing, or doing something in defiance in
an angry sort of screw it all reaction to some of the crap
in my past(and present)...knowing all along im loosing it here and gotta
get a grip. Being out of control, knowing it, but being unable
to do a damn thing about it.
I don't know how well that actually matches up with the lyrics
but that is my listening to once frame of mind disected...
allareone
8/4/99 03:41 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
great song to jam slam to, lots of cranking energy in the music.
lyrically, an angry, messy break up (be it with whomever) with a 'f#ck you don't throw your shit on me' attitude, someone who didn't believe in that person as another person
redmosquito
8/4/99 06:12 AM
Re: Let's start!!!!!!! ONCE
I agree with Isabelle, I think that half of the song (basically the "once upon a time" part) is talking about how everything was once in control, but it no longer is. The other half of the song, I think, talks about the incident that made him lose all of his control. I had always thought it was an event with him (and his back seat lover)were held at gun point (or something like that), but the only thing is that Eddie never says what that incident was, he tells a description of it but not enought to make anything clear. I think whatever that incident may be is up to the listener's imagination, and all we know for certain is that it was very devastating if he has lost all control.
The only question I have is whether or not this song is related to any events in Eddie's life, or is it another story about somebody else and he is trying to see things as if he were in their shoes. What do U think?
Jason
8/4/99 06:18 AM
Re: Bingo!
That is so true, I had always thought that there must be a connection with the trilogy, ahhhhh...it all comes together now! Thanks!
evenkat
8/4/99 07:33 AM
Re: ONCE
I never thought about the prostitute part, I just thought it was someone, picked up or whatever, but now that part makes sense. The song makes me feel on-easy that a person could feel that way, but I can relate to the anger and sometimes you think about doing things that you normally wouldn't do, but you don't cross the line. This song takes you across the line. I find it very intense.
"You know what it's like" EV
JDE-PJ
8/30/99 02:34 AM
FOR ALL THE NEW JAMILY MEMBERS
since it was their anni yesterday and since VS is coming up in a day or two thought I would post Ten again, plus there seems to be new members all the time.
I know someday you will have a beautiful life
Jason
CandleOfThought
1/14/01 4:31 PM
And so it all started...
This was in the past millenium...
This is officially my 100th post (officially because that discards the ones made with previous ID's)... so few, actually... my friend hedonist has over 12000 (I gasped for air when I saw that!!) and she came here after I did...
So why bother with my 100th post? Because among these posts were these same Song Of The Day threads that made them feel like much more... they were amazing for all of us who made them a habit, I believe, and ElCon should be sanctified here for them...
Funny... we started talking about music... then about the emotions they aroused in us... then we went on to talk about the special moments in our lives, good and bad, they related to. And soon we were laying down oour souls in our writing, opening up, telling each other things we even had trouble admitting to ourselves. And we were UNDERSTOOD. We were understood because the music was there, it was there to contextualize the words, it was there to depict the feelings. And, through the music, we were able to share these feelings.
I feel I have made true friends here, despite coming here now only once in a long while, despite never having known them except in thought. I know they felt for me as I felt for them, and I feel guilt for having deserted them. I really hope that I can come back one of these days, and that they will welcome me back as always. But for now, I look at these posts as I would upon old photos, memories of youth when everything was warmer and simpler.
The board has changed, I can see that. It boils with activity and noise, so much than carefully nurtured thoughts are often never read, they get lost in the din. And people who come here may feel abandoned and lost in a crowd of strange faces.
But the music is still there, isn't it? What brings us together here is or should be unchanged...
Relax. Put a PJ record on. Let yourself be immersed in the music. And then, after that, hopefully you will *know* why you are here - to live the music and to bring it to life. So tune in and enjoy the ride.
"Lying sideways atop crumpled sheets and no covers he decides to dream.
Dream up a new self for himself"
Love,
*** CandleOfThought ***
"Shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel"
hedonist
1/14/01 5:09 PM
And so it continues.......
Candle...so wonderful to see you again...you DO know you're always welcome here, don't you? Doesn't matter how often one stops by...the friendship always remains (though it would be good to see you more often).......
I love how you described the evolution of these SOTD interps...a few of my most precious friendships were formed during those times.....
The music is still here...as is the understanding...usually.......
Hope you'll visit more often, my friend...I miss you, and your insightful eloquence........
******tuning in and enjoying the ride...................
CandleOfThought
1/14/01 5:46 PM
Re: And so it continues.......
Of course I know... and whenever I don't, you and all our friends from those golden days (wow - I truly speak like an elder now, emphasizing what was lost and reluctant to see what might have been gained... ) are always quick to make me *feel* it.
I won't promise again that I'll be back... done enough of that in the past, and I hate to break promises... but hopefully I soon will be able to come more often - maybe I'll even catch up on you on the number of posts, heh? (I'm joking, of course!!)
I remember when you first arrived... you announced yourself as one who had been "lurking in the shadows", if I recall correctly, and finally had mustered the courage to make yourself known... you got a big welcome from *everybody*, of course, as was the custom in those days... soon you were dazzling everyone with the richness of your thoughts and the generosity of your feelings - and the speed and completeness with which you replied to the SOTD's, leaving all the others lost to find anything to add... )
These days, of course, you pretty much run the show as part of the controversial "PJ elite" some mumbled about, failing to see that it is none other than respect and admiration gained through sharing that makes you popular here, not a dictatorship held by the old ones. I'm glad. I'm glad that among all the visual confusion, you and brokenarrow and PJMom and RrVwMirror and others from the old days still shine as beacons and help bring some reason to the chaos - and of course make us old deserters feel that they still have a home to return to.
"And now he's home, and we're laughing, like we always did, my same old, same old friend"
(Kat - sorry about this - I get the feeling this should have been a PM, and I hope you'll excuse me, but I felt I had to express it publicly )
Love always,
*** CandleOfThought ***
"Shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel"
hedonist
1/14/01 6:22 PM
Re: And so it continues.......
Wow, I remember when I first came aboard here...surprised you remember too! I had no idea of all the gifts I would be given, upon making that first post...so very glad I did.......
(you know what *I* remember? Your interp of Off He Goes...you were listening to the rain as it played...and that peacefulness was conveyed so articulately in your words)
Thank you for your kind words, Candle...as far as your praise of me goes, I'm not sure it's entirely warranted.........
Love to you......
RrVwMirror
1/15/01 11:17 AM
Re: And so it all started...
((((((CANDLE))))))
You have been sorely missed my friend!!!
So nice to see you here....to read these words....reflecting.....Thank You!
I let my music take me where my heart wants to go....
~C.S.
EVedder23
4/19/01 01:47 AM
Re: SOTD: ONCE
Just found this too...this was the VERY beginning...great reading...what memories...
~Kelly
"Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life"
RrVwMirror
4/19/01 08:58 AM
Re: SOTD: ONCE
So good to see a renewed interest in the SOTD threads!!
Thanks EVedder23 and Spanna for bumping a few of these back up!
(EVedder...I will get back to you a little later!)
I let my music take me where my heart wants to go....
~C.S.
Nico Blue
4/19/01 09:16 AM
Re: SOTD: ONCE
classic stuff...
All over a bowl of bitter beans-SH
EdHead99
4/19/01 10:31 AM
Re: SOTD: ONCE
Great thoughts here...
and so nice to see you, Candle!
I loved reading everyone's input on the SOTD posts. Many times I would discover something about a song that I hadn't noticed before...and I agree that it was a great way to share my own thoughts as well. There were times that I didn't contribute to the posts, but rather just read them and enjoyed them. There were probably many other people who did the same thing.
New sign campaign:
*BRING BACK THE SOTD* !!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and so it goes...
Jason
hooray for history
You make me feel uncalm and I think I like it - 311
JEFF ROX MY SOX!
"Jeff is just a badass all the way across the board" ~aNiMaL~
"Chill out Kaddikat"
great song, can't believe its been 12 years since Ten came out.
the whole world will be relieved
Yep borisdisco, I will be doing exactly that!
Jason
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird