*sticky* Ever hear someone use this excuse for not wanting to order food from somewhere?

The Juggler

I feel like I just wrapped up a taping of Curb Your Enthusiasm with the wife. Does this excuse make sense to anyone?

Juggler- "You wanna just order food instead of going out?"
Wife-"That's fine with me"
Juggler flips through menus and finds one they have not ordered from before..
Juggler- "Wanna be daring and try a new spot?"
Wife- "Where are they located?"
Juggler.....thinking that's an odd question for a place that will deliver to us "Umm.....I don't know....ah, looks like its in that Walmart shopping center."
Wife-"No, that's too far."
Juggler-"Too far? They deliver."
Wife-"They're too far away. No"
Juggler- "What do you mean? They're a pizza delivery place. They sent us a menu. That's them saying "we deliver to you!" Why would would we not order from them?"
Wife-"No Juggler! I'm not going to make some delivery person drive all the way out here just for a pizza"
Juggler-"That's his job! What?! Why?!"
Wife-"I'm not talking about this anymore. Order wherever you want. I'm not eating."
Juggler-"This makes no sense!"


W
T
F
?

The place in question is 3.8 miles away and a 12 minute drive.

Anyone? Help me out here...I'm baffled

OMGkatwoman

Hahaha, that sounds like me when I was really looking forward to going out to eat NOT pizza!

funk2funky

Don't know. Don't bring that place up again, I guess.

Fifthelement

I think this is about more than pizza. Did you forget her b-day? Anniversary? Graduation? Maybe she just had a shitty day at work.

Perhaps she just really doesn't want pizza. Or maybe she'd rather the usual place. Good luck.

Wma31394

Maybe she wants to skip dinner and get to dessert?!?

Wobbie

your wife calls you "juggler"?

maybe aunt flo is visiting?

hedonist

Wobbie said:

your wife calls you "juggler"?

maybe aunt flo is visiting?

That's like Carrie calling Brody "Brody" on Homeland.

You best have placed the order, Juggler.

BLACK35

That was too funny, laughed out loud!

The Juggler

Fifthelement said:

I think this is about more than pizza. Did you forget her b-day? Anniversary? Graduation? Maybe she just had a shitty day at work.

Perhaps she just really doesn't want pizza. Or maybe she'd rather the usual place. Good luck.

No. None of that. It was totally because she felt we lived too far away from this place.

rgambs

That's insane. 4 miles?
Insanity.

You are right to say "this makes no sense".

Tell her Gumby has to drive 20 miles and almost 30 minutes to buy a pizza.
Uphill both ways.

F Me In The Brain

See, were I the most famous Juggler, I would search through the folder/drawer/pile of delivery menus you no doubt have built up and look at every place that is 3.9 miles away and ONLY suggest ordering from those places from now on.
Every time they deliver I would stand on the couch and point at Mrs Juggler and say "AHA! 4.2 miles, baby!"

I echo what Hedo shared....you best have placed the order....tipped the driver a Hamilton....had a mouthgasm while eating the delivery food, all the while proclaiming how big the pizza was and that you have never experienced something like this in your mouth before.


No, I never heard that reason and I think it is baffling.

dankind

For culinary reasons, I'm with wifey. Delivery pizza sucks. The further it has to travel, the more it sucks.

The only way to save it is to reheat it in the oven/toaster oven. In which case, you should've just cooked dinner at home.

HesCalledDyer

Fifthelement said:

I think this is about more than pizza. Did you forget her b-day? Anniversary? Graduation? Maybe she just had a shitty day at work.

Perhaps she just really doesn't want pizza. Or maybe she'd rather the usual place. Good luck.

dankind said:

For culinary reasons, I'm with wifey. Delivery pizza sucks. The further it has to travel, the more it sucks.

The only way to save it is to reheat it in the oven/toaster oven. In which case, you should've just cooked dinner at home.

If any of these are Mrs. Juggler's reasons, though, why can't she just say that instead of "it's too far"?! Ugh, women...

SVRDhand13

Haha thanks for the laugh. Go through this one all the time:

What do you want?
Anything.
How's Mexican?
No anything but that.
Chinese?
Nah.

F Me In The Brain

I used to ask "Hey do you want to go to dinner?
When she said yes, I would get her in the car and just start driving. Would drive all over until she made up her mind. This was fun for me, not as much for her.
She stopped this from happening and now will not leave the house until we agree on where to go. When we lived in LA it could last for an hour. Funny shit.

RKCNDY

perhaps she feels that said pizza would be cold by the time you get it.

I won't order delivery from the pizza place that's a block away...because I know they are thinking, "lazy fucks...they could f'n walk here and get it"

I think they charge $3 to deliver anyway

funk2funky

Wat

Cliffy6745

People still use paper menus?

The Juggler

We ended up ordering from a restaurant we like for takeout.

I drove 2.6 miles and 8 minutes to pick it up.

F Me In The Brain

Cliffy6745 said:

People still use paper menus?

That is a great point. We have a book of them in the secretary standing in the foyer. Only save them because of the coupons.

oftenreading

F Me In The Brain said:

Cliffy6745 said:

People still use paper menus?

That is a great point. We have a book of them in the secretary standing in the foyer. Only save them because of the coupons.

People still use paper coupons?