Ramblings

whispering handswhispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
I need something to take my
Mind off of the torture that can be my life. I know you guys don't believe there is a God. But I do. I know that He loves me and looks out for me, but I often wonder why we suffer here on earth so terribly. I know 90% of that has to do with the reflection of one's freewill imposed upon others. But what makes us so desperate that we want to die rather than face life?
I am guilty of this lazy escape plan. I have many times stared into the gleam
Of a slickly sharpened razor with desires festered deep inside my soul; crying, SCREAMING in desperation for the release it offered. But since I have returned into my walk with Jesus, I have not experienced this. The razors no longer sing to me the Siren's song.
I still get worn down, tired, and often feel defeated, but that ' fuck this life' solution is no longer an option. I thank God for that, because I discovered this band, While trying to blow my head off. Literally.
Now I have a hope in my God, that He has much better plans for me, than I could ever construct. And I know now, that just because life is hard, ( for EVERYONE, not just me), doesn't mean God hates me, or is angry with me. It simply means that sometimes life just plain ole sucks out loud; but I can carry on and weather the storms in faith the He is protecting me.
Sorry just had to ramble a bit. Forgive my going all JWp on you all.but it's where I am at jn life. And this little 'verse' is my contribution in thought.
Good night. :sleep:

Comments

  • JWPearlJWPearl Posts: 19,893
    i love you..
    work is tough.... and there would be no tube if life were not convincing
    (if its too easy its never last....)
    its whos there when your down that matters.. and those who are not
    are not worth your breath...
    i hope you will be okay and your sister but remember this
    its the ones that knock you about who suffer consequence
    and they are allowed to temporarily get away with it purely for the purpose of conviction.....!!!
    and no tribulation comes onto one by chance its either the cruel
    system we live in or dark forces and those who are blindly lead by it..
    what your sister needs now is plenty of love and counseling
    and to be understood for her reasons of wanting to end her life and try to solve the key problem
    with love..
    there is a reason why God allows suffering but i can say it all on here but it is valid reason
    purely we have freedom of choice leading to the causes but i leave you with these to read..

    take your pick
    https://www.jw.org/en/search/?q=why+does+God+permit+suffering
  • JWPearlJWPearl Posts: 19,893
    people forget we are humans and theres only so much we can take
    its the ones that never regard the feeling of water that get judged
    for their actions because they worked mercilessly....with disregard of
    damage or not trying to fix it....its humane to care...calice to bury one already low....
  • AnnafalkAnnafalk Sweden Posts: 4,004
    edited August 2016
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I have many times asked myself the same questions.
    Life if hard as you say for everyone, I think we just have to support each other the best we can and also be kind towards ourselves to make the road a little easier.
    Post edited by Annafalk on
  • JWPearlJWPearl Posts: 19,893
    sorry I couldn't help myself but it's found out..slept on it....had to let you know
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