Help Out Those In the "Disability Rows"- Fan Request
ratmando
Posts: 347
hey all.
Back the States and sometimes, sadly, it seems to the ME-ME-ME super charged self-absorbed folks who really aren't fans but who live Vicariously through their tablets and phones... (really folks, BE in the moment.. why go to a show if you can't?)...have developed a way to ensure those of us in the disabled seating areas are less likely to enjoy the show. SO here are some tips for REAL fans to help make sure your fellow 10-clubbers, Disabled Veterans, Senior Citizens, Kids in Wheelchairs, and those who have service dogs have a chance to enjoy the show, too... Take it from my last 10 years of wheelchair hell as a music addicted fan.
1. First-- The companion seats are not FREE seats that we save for strangers. Very often they are the people who are holding our medications, ensuring our safety, and the ones who see if our ostomy bags need changing. (Seriously an issue, you don't want to be there.) We pay full price for both OUR seat and the companion seats... if we do have the right to the seat, please don't try to use us to hide from security so you can be at better view of the stage. Many times, you end up blocking the view of the person who isn't able to stand, or move from where we are.
2. If you want to take a photo from where we are sitting, ASK- most of the time, we are happy to have a new pal to say GREAT SHOW! to, and we like being treated like human beings not generic sick people . You can talk directly TO us, and not have the people sitting next to us answer for us, unless we ask you to, but again, keep in mind.. we didn't pay for your seat, and it isn't a full show perk.
3. We are not the beer holders for the entire Arena. I think that in LA, I had more beer spilled into my wheelchair than I had in the last 12 years of bringing it to shows. Why? Because some arenas, in the infinite wisdom place wheelchair seating just inside entrances in case we have to have medical emergency staff take us out of the area. (It's happened on many occasions, but honestly, I've seen more girls fake fainting spells thinking it will get them to the rail than anything else.) Because we are close to entrances, we are close to restrooms, and beer gardens. That doesn't mean we are your rest stop, holding station so you can pass beer and whatever up and down a section of seats. Very uncool- we're people.
4. Kids, short folks, dwarves, and seniors-- we just get the view above the rail. Seriously - try it. Sit in a folding chair, at a rail, see what you can see.. most of us get a full view ONLY 4-8 inches above the great big pipe designed to hold the crowds away. Some venues are terrific in that they've planned for audiences to be around 6' tall, and allow 2 full feet of standing room above the last row. That doesn't mean you should JUMP up on your chair in front of the entire disabled row. How would you feel if you got to see nothing but someone's Levi pocket for 3 hours? Oh, and that brings us to ...
5. Most of us in disabled will NEVER be able to get to GA. We don't get set lists, tambourines, wine, and there are so many of us that can't even leave to use the restroom, in case a security or usher person ends up moving someone into our spot. (Sometimes you'll see 13 wheelchairs in a row, and the designated seating area only holds 8 people.. who thinks that a wheelchair is thinner than a sitting audience member? If you do... you're not realistic.) We will never get the handshakes, or have Mike toss us a pick, or have the guys crowd surf near us. We sacrifice a lot more than regular fans when we go to shows. If we have leg braces or arm braces and canes, we're not just dealing with a sprain-- we have MS, or Lupus, Cerebral Palsy, ALS, or Ehlers-Danlos, or myriad other serious disorders that make it impossible for us to stand or sit at all, or for long periods of time. SO, for number 5-- keeping in mind we don't get to even hope for the gifties so many fans get 2-3 times a year at shows... we would like to be allowed a merchandise line visit. Sadly, so many people cut in front of chairs/disabled people, even stickers are seen as "someday I'll get one". If you see a disabled person in a merchandise line, remember, we are PEOPLE.... and we have saved money- sometimes it's social security, so it really is a BIG deal.... and that 30 stickers you bought just prevented someone from getting ONE. Ebay flippers are really not cool, and to have them jump in front of disabled folks to snag the last inexpensive item on the cart? Way not cool.---Part two coming..
Back the States and sometimes, sadly, it seems to the ME-ME-ME super charged self-absorbed folks who really aren't fans but who live Vicariously through their tablets and phones... (really folks, BE in the moment.. why go to a show if you can't?)...have developed a way to ensure those of us in the disabled seating areas are less likely to enjoy the show. SO here are some tips for REAL fans to help make sure your fellow 10-clubbers, Disabled Veterans, Senior Citizens, Kids in Wheelchairs, and those who have service dogs have a chance to enjoy the show, too... Take it from my last 10 years of wheelchair hell as a music addicted fan.
1. First-- The companion seats are not FREE seats that we save for strangers. Very often they are the people who are holding our medications, ensuring our safety, and the ones who see if our ostomy bags need changing. (Seriously an issue, you don't want to be there.) We pay full price for both OUR seat and the companion seats... if we do have the right to the seat, please don't try to use us to hide from security so you can be at better view of the stage. Many times, you end up blocking the view of the person who isn't able to stand, or move from where we are.
2. If you want to take a photo from where we are sitting, ASK- most of the time, we are happy to have a new pal to say GREAT SHOW! to, and we like being treated like human beings not generic sick people . You can talk directly TO us, and not have the people sitting next to us answer for us, unless we ask you to, but again, keep in mind.. we didn't pay for your seat, and it isn't a full show perk.
3. We are not the beer holders for the entire Arena. I think that in LA, I had more beer spilled into my wheelchair than I had in the last 12 years of bringing it to shows. Why? Because some arenas, in the infinite wisdom place wheelchair seating just inside entrances in case we have to have medical emergency staff take us out of the area. (It's happened on many occasions, but honestly, I've seen more girls fake fainting spells thinking it will get them to the rail than anything else.) Because we are close to entrances, we are close to restrooms, and beer gardens. That doesn't mean we are your rest stop, holding station so you can pass beer and whatever up and down a section of seats. Very uncool- we're people.
4. Kids, short folks, dwarves, and seniors-- we just get the view above the rail. Seriously - try it. Sit in a folding chair, at a rail, see what you can see.. most of us get a full view ONLY 4-8 inches above the great big pipe designed to hold the crowds away. Some venues are terrific in that they've planned for audiences to be around 6' tall, and allow 2 full feet of standing room above the last row. That doesn't mean you should JUMP up on your chair in front of the entire disabled row. How would you feel if you got to see nothing but someone's Levi pocket for 3 hours? Oh, and that brings us to ...
5. Most of us in disabled will NEVER be able to get to GA. We don't get set lists, tambourines, wine, and there are so many of us that can't even leave to use the restroom, in case a security or usher person ends up moving someone into our spot. (Sometimes you'll see 13 wheelchairs in a row, and the designated seating area only holds 8 people.. who thinks that a wheelchair is thinner than a sitting audience member? If you do... you're not realistic.) We will never get the handshakes, or have Mike toss us a pick, or have the guys crowd surf near us. We sacrifice a lot more than regular fans when we go to shows. If we have leg braces or arm braces and canes, we're not just dealing with a sprain-- we have MS, or Lupus, Cerebral Palsy, ALS, or Ehlers-Danlos, or myriad other serious disorders that make it impossible for us to stand or sit at all, or for long periods of time. SO, for number 5-- keeping in mind we don't get to even hope for the gifties so many fans get 2-3 times a year at shows... we would like to be allowed a merchandise line visit. Sadly, so many people cut in front of chairs/disabled people, even stickers are seen as "someday I'll get one". If you see a disabled person in a merchandise line, remember, we are PEOPLE.... and we have saved money- sometimes it's social security, so it really is a BIG deal.... and that 30 stickers you bought just prevented someone from getting ONE. Ebay flippers are really not cool, and to have them jump in front of disabled folks to snag the last inexpensive item on the cart? Way not cool.---Part two coming..
When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest.
Henry David Thoreau
Henry David Thoreau
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7. Service dogs-- It's a big deal for many of us. I have Mutt Muffs for my dog. And other people have hearing protection home-made for service animals. This is a really adorable thing to see... a cute dog, with mickey-mouse ears, rocking at a concert. Children have asked me if it's okay to pet Monty (the Rocker Doggy). But, I've had so many people interrupt him when he was getting my medication, or letting me know he needed a "potty break" or anything he is supposed to do to take his picture. I get that it's a cool thing to see a dog at a show, but remember, they're working for a reason. Please just ASK. It's so simple.. "Hey, that's a great dog, can I take his picture?", and I bet you'll hear "Yes of course!". Monty ended up on a LOT of Google pages and Picasawebs, and facebook, and all over the net. You're saying "Hey, you're a person, cool" which is a big deal, in any case, and you're respecting the work my dog does. That's good for him, as well.
8. Alcohol is prohibited for so many of us on pain meds, and other medications- it's neither cute, funny, or a reason for a bet to get a "gimp drunk" as I've seen some strange folks try to do. In my case, I was on Morphine for years, and now on Methadone, (meaning I can almost walk normally some days finally!), but that doesn't mean I want to get wasted with you. That is part of the thing I see when people try to get the companion seats, or worse, pal up because security is asking people to get to their seats or stop blocking fire lane paths. If you feel the need to suck up to us, or if you see we have no companion, or if you think we're hot, (yes, some of us are!), and you'd like to get to know us better.. a nice bottle of water is a great way to start.
9. What I LOVE about Pearl Jam fans.. of all the shows I've seen, the PJ folks are the kindest to anyone who seems to need help. BUT I've also seen people "fake it". Using a cane? Great! Did you happen to buy 11 disabled seats because you thought those were the only places to get an unobstructed view? Then you're a douche, and the bag it came in. Your ingrown toe nail my be the most painful thing in your life, but I was sitting next to a guy who was in a plane crash, another Veteran, like myself was on the other side, and me? I have a disease that makes all of my bones pop out of joint, plus my veins and tendons are VERY loose.. meaning if you hit me too hard you may rupture an artery. Right next to us, in San Diego, were five guys who were there because they were having a stag party-- got tickets the day of show, saw that they could have sections 200 OR could be in disabled. It's not against the law YET for venues to sell these seats to anyone. But think about it.. how many senior citizens, disabled folks, or even people who seem like they're recovering from something have you seen in the last few shows you've been to, who may not have those disabled seats? Guess what... security is trained to watch for people like that, and most venues carry their own wheelchairs and folding chairs so that if someone does seem sick or infirmed, they can be moved to those spots. The disabled seating sells out fast, first, and a majority of the open spots you think are available, are actually called Red Cross Reserve. It's a way for ADA compliance to be met day of show. What if you had a kid, and the week before you FINALLY got to see a PJ show, he was in a skateboard accident and broke his ankle. Should he miss the show because the disabled seating is sold out? NO-- security is likely to move you and him to a RCR seat. Real fans are very cool about this. .. some will gladly give up their unethically obtained disabled spot to help a real gimpy person out. PJ fans do... so watch for it. You may end up in GA because of it. (It's happened several times that I've seen.)
10. This year... I'm hoping others will join me in HELP -A- DISABLED-FAN- OUT. Did you get 10 or 12 picks tossed at you? Do you need all of them or would you like to hand one or two to someone in the wheelchair seats? Is that the 21st Tambourine you have because you borrowed a nephew to wear on your shoulders? Consider giving it to someone who will NEVER get that opportunity- or even offering a cheap sale, (I'd spend $10 on a tambourine!!). You'd still make cash, and you'd do something huge-- help out someone who would NEVER expect such a kindness from ANYONE. Do you think Steve Gleason is the only ALS fan? Look around... maybe you were able to snag 5 or 6 stickers from the show. Did you notice that some of us have our wheelchairs decorated in stickers? Why? It's generally all we can afford or carry! Going to a Pre-party? First hand experience.. I tried desperately to bid on auction items, but no one could hear me at ass level- and I lost out on three items I wanted to buy. Be the VOICE for someone in a chair at a party. Have you met any of us disabled fans? If you see us alone at a party- invite us to your table! (Waitresses and waiters are REALLY fast when it comes to serving disabled customers.) And to help make our experience part of a real PJ FAN experience.. don't be afraid to talk directly to us. Some of us have speech issues, yes, but some don't. And those of us who do have speech issues just need your patience... we have working minds, and we're pretty cool people. (We know all the songs, I swear!) How about a copy of a set list? A cool thing I was sent last year-- a friend copied all of the set lists from a website, and put them in a binder- with a couple of photos from each venue, the show date, and when it came to picking out what Boots I wanted.. I had a GREAT idea that the Worcester show, and the Oklahoma show were going to be SO cool. And they are. You don't have to give us your life collection.. we just want to share our love of the band with you.. WE are People.
Thanks yalzes. (yeah, Harvard grad, howdya know?)
xo to Erich, Dave, Marc, Jeremy, Hazel, Vicky, Marina, Tina, Stephen, Garry, and the 12 or so others who were so kind to me in the 2013 tour.
Cathe, aka ratmando
Henry David Thoreau
Very enlightening read. Thank you for sharing this.
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2009 - Toronto
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2011 - Toronto 1&2
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2014 - Cincinnati, St. Louis, Detroit
2016 - Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Ottawa, Toronto 1
2018 - Fenway 1&2
2022 - Hamilton, Toronto
2023 - Chicago 1&2
2024 - Las Vegas 1&2
Thank you Cathe
Try not to be one. Make mom proud.
Dan Johns
Henry David Thoreau
She would gladly trade what others think of as disability "perks" for a day without pain.
Great post! My wife sends her kudos for how well written it is.
Henry David Thoreau
Try not to be one. Make mom proud.
Dan Johns
What a fantastic post!
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
Henry David Thoreau
I believe in miracles....... I believe in a better place for you and me..........
Henry David Thoreau
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
Not naming names, but If you're not NEEDING that ADA area, and you find yourself in that area, chances are you're kind of a douche.
Hartford 10.02.96 | Mansfield 2 09.16.98 | Mansfield 1 08.29.00 | Mansfield 1 07.02.03 | Mansfield 3 07.11.03 | Boston 2 05.25.06 | Tampa 04.11.16 | Fenway 1 08.05.16 | Fenway 2 08.07.16 | Fenway 1 09.02.18 | Fenway 2 09.04.18 | Baltimore 03.28.20 | Hamilton 09.06.22 | Toronto 09.08.22 | Nashville 09.16.22 | St Louis 09.18.22 | Baltimore 09.12.24 | Fenway 1 09.15.24 | Fenway 2 09.17.24
"He made the deal with the devil, we get to play with him.
He goes to hell, of course. We're going to heaven."
Henry David Thoreau
Glad you had a blast during this tour
Great discussion to educate people. Ratmando... you should re-post every so often
Stub Hub and others sell ADA seats for 10 x face. Talk about lack of compassion
All it takes is being observant and remembering that even the tiniest acts of kindness (to anyone, not only disabled fans) sparks a ripple that spreads. Definitely being considerate and not being a douche is also super important.
Thanks again Ratmando! If it's ok, I've shared with another concert-addicted disabled friend/fan who does a lot of work in her country (Australia) to bring attention to both the challenges and opportunities that happen to differently-abled fans. Here's to hundreds more awesome shows for you!
Henry David Thoreau
Sorry to go off topic but not sure what changed from then other than GA vs assigned seating.
Henry David Thoreau
~not a dude~
2010: MSGx2
2012: Made In America
2013: Pittsburgh, Brooklynx2, Hartford, Baltimore
2014: Leeds, Milton Keynes, Detroit
2015: Global Citizen Festival
2016: Phillyx2, MSGx2, Fenwayx2
2018: Barcelona, Wrigleyx2
Henry David Thoreau