Well first of all, it's great to hear that this thread brought something positive for people. That is awesome, and the whole reason for the contest, so I'm grateful that it worked! :x
And here we are, the winners! I included the detailed reasoning behind my choices here - it's all just from my own perspective of course. No doubt everyone hss a different idea when interpretting the poems (including the winners maybe!), but the wonderful thing about poetry is that it is wide open to interpretation. I hope my interpretations explain why i made the choices i did.
1st PLACE WINNER IS.....
aurynsdad!!!! (Red LB prize!) With:
--- Rolled down the grass hill Before the show and was sure Life couldn't be better ---
This one is fantastic to me. It's visceral but so simple at the same time, which is exactly what I think the ideal Haiku should be, and that's the factor that finally nudged this one into first place when I was having trouble choosing between the three.
Rolling down the grass hill feels like a metaphor that I don't want to verbalize so that we can just imagine it one by one (though I know this experience is a real one for the poet). The cadence of the poem is what hooks me. The lack of punctuation is so well used - If you say it out loud in one breath it slips out like a smooth, rolling thought (appropriately). The lack of a story setup for this one moment makes it appealing to me. The very specific, real, personal memory seems like a symbol for the collective PJ experience. The way the poem sounds and flows makes it easy to imagine rolling down that hill and, ultimately, feeling that way we do on show night as well as the way our memories become emotion. And yes, I read couldn't as one syllable here, in case anyone's wondering - the flow of the poem allowed it; I actually found it to be a slick move, using that apostrophe to his advantage, lol. It played towards the poems success as one that should be recited out loud in a prescribed way. Neato.
So way to go aurynsdad. Congrats!
SECOND PLACE!!!!
njnancy (Vitalogy package prize)!!! With:
--- So needed, yet rare. Pearl Jam seeks that muted voice Begging to be heard ---
I love this one. For me it speaks to the ineffable feeling that PJ brings - That personal and collective connection so many experience with this music, and yes, I do think how PJ affects people is rare. Those feelings that aren't necessarily spoken, but felt through the music, lyrics, the experience, especially during those times that would otherwise seem isolating. Also, I think about how we connect so closely with lyrics; sometimes it can feel like their songs speak for us when we can't seem to speak ourselves at first. And that PJ "seeks" on our behalf is a cool, complicated concept that I really enjoyed.
THIRD PLACE!!!!:
topkicker (4 holiday singles prize)!!!!! With:
--- Invisible chains, lyrical spikes break each link. We stand together ---
This poem is awesome to me because it so well expresses that 'PJ crowd connection' that happens at a show. Unfortunately, people seem so separated from one another at times that it's almost like they are chained apart. That idea of "chained apart", seeming like a contradiction, really struck me. And then the music breaks whatever it is that keeps us chained apart day to day, and being unchained actually chains us closer together in a positive spirit. Very cool.
Well first of all, it's great to hear that this thread brought something positive for people. That is awesome, and the whole reason for the contest, so I'm grateful that it worked! :x
And here we are, the winners! I included the detailed reasoning behind my choices here - it's all just from my own perspective of course. No doubt everyone hss a different idea when interpretting the poems (including the winners maybe!), but the wonderful thing about poetry is that it is wide open to interpretation. I hope my interpretations explain why i made the choices i did.
1st PLACE WINNER IS.....
aurynsdad!!!! (Red LB prize!) With:
--- Rolled down the grass hill Before the show and was sure Life couldn't be better ---
This one is fantastic to me. It's visceral but so simple at the same time, which is exactly what I think the ideal Haiku should be, and that's the factor that finally nudged this one into first place when I was having trouble choosing between the three.
Rolling down the grass hill feels like a metaphor that I don't want to verbalize so that we can just imagine it one by one (though I know this experience is a real one for the poet). The cadence of the poem is what hooks me. The lack of punctuation is so well used - If you say it out loud in one breath it slips out like a smooth, rolling thought (appropriately). The lack of a story setup for this one moment makes it appealing to me. The very specific, real, personal memory seems like a symbol for the collective PJ experience. The way the poem sounds and flows makes it easy to imagine rolling down that hill and, ultimately, feeling that way we do on show night as well as the way our memories become emotion. And yes, I read couldn't as one syllable here, in case anyone's wondering - the flow of the poem allowed it; I actually found it to be a slick move, using that apostrophe to his advantage, lol. It played towards the poems success as one that should be recited out loud in a prescribed way. Neato.
So way to go aurynsdad. Congrats!
SECOND PLACE!!!!
njnancy (Vitalogy package prize)!!! With:
--- So needed, yet rare. Pearl Jam seeks that muted voice Begging to be heard ---
I love this one. For me it speaks to the ineffable feeling that PJ brings - That personal and collective connection so many experience with this music, and yes, I do think how PJ affects people is rare. Those feelings that aren't necessarily spoken, but felt through the music, lyrics, the experience, especially during those times that would otherwise seem isolating. Also, I think about how we connect so closely with lyrics; sometimes it can feel like their songs speak for us when we can't seem to speak ourselves at first. And that PJ "seeks" on our behalf is a cool, complicated concept that I really enjoyed.
THIRD PLACE!!!!:
topkicker (4 holiday singles prize)!!!!! With:
--- Invisible chains, lyrical spikes break each link. We stand together ---
This poem is awesome to me because it so well expresses that 'PJ crowd connection' that happens at a show. Unfortunately, people seem so separated from one another at times that it's almost like they are chained apart. That idea of "chained apart", seeming like a contradiction, really struck me. And then the music breaks whatever it is that keeps us chained apart day to day, and being unchained actually chains us closer together in a positive spirit. Very cool.
10/31/93 Berkeley (Baba!) • 10/1/94 Bridge School • 9/16/96 Seattle (In My Tree!) • 10/19/96 & 10/20/96 B. School (Alt Corduroy & Alt Porch!) • 10/25/03 B. School • 6/1/03 Mtnview (Crazy Mary! You Are!) • 11/29/13 Portland (All Those Yesterdays! Even Flow!) • 10/25/14 Bridge School (Rain! Fuckin Up! TOTD!) • 5/13/22 Oakland (had to leave early, but W.M.A.! Immortality!)
Comments
Great poems, fantastic contest. Congrats to all!
"Let's check Idaho."