Heartbreaking...

gimmesometruth27

i thought this deserves it's own thread. this is a letter from a child at Sandy Hook to his best friend who died there. To me it puts the human element and the depth of loss into perspective. Click the link to see the picture of the letter written in the careful handwriting of a 6 year old, as well as pics of John with his friend Jack.

Heart-stopping letter to Newtown shooting victim Jack Pinto from his best friend

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/hea ... 02176.html

How do you say goodbye? USA Today reporter Yamiche Alcindor tweeted out this touching letter that was written to Newtown shooting victim Jack Pinto by his best friend, John.

Six-year-old Jack was gunned down in the massacre last Friday at Sandy Hook Elementary School.

The letter, surfaced by Hypervocal, reads:


Jack,
You are my best friend.
We had fun together.
I will miss you.
I will talk to you in my prayers.
I love you Jack.
Love,
John

The first-grader, who was a big fan of New York Giants wide receiver Victor Cruz, was also remembered by the pro ball player. Cruz paid his respects to the Pinto family one day after Jack was buried in his favorite Victor Cruz jersey.

Cruz tweeted after the visit, “Much love to the entire Pinto family. Great people with huge hearts. I'm sorry again for your loss. Looking at life through a different lens.”

After learning he was the first-grader’s favorite player, the Giants team member dedicated Sunday’s game to him, writing “Jack Pinto” and “my hero” on his cleats and gloves.

pandora

Prayers so soothing. Dr. Phil mentioned that faith will help the victims young and old
get through this. It really helps to know you can talk to your loved ones passed.
This expression so healing.

rollings

JonnyPistachio

rollings wrote:

Damn if thats not the saddest thing ever...
I cant imagine how a boy of 6-7 must've felt/thought as he wrote out those words about his friend.

brianlux

Thank you for an excellent and appropriate thread regarding the Newtown incident, Gimme. Young John's letter is very heartbreaking indeed.

gimmesometruth27

brianlux wrote:

Thank you for an excellent and appropriate thread regarding the Newtown incident, Gimme. Young John's letter is very heartbreaking indeed.

that letter is so sad. so short, so direct and to the point, so simple.

i tried to think back to when i was six and at that those would have been the only things i could have said in that situation as well. at that age those thoughts and feelings were really all i knew.

blackredyellow

Heartbreaking indeed... There are comments that I've heard over the course of the last week which stand out.

I apologize for not remembering the details, but can't remember which child it was, but a family member was saying that their little brother couldn't understand why he couldn't play with his best friend anymore. Having little kids of my own, I can't imagine the heartbreak that these parents are going through, not only for their huge loss, but to deal with seeing their other children going through this as well.

dimitrispearljam

what to say....so so sad

cincybearcat

I thought we were pissed about the media coverage?

Hugh Freaking Dillon

I don't know how much more of this I can take.

comebackgirl

blackredyellow wrote:

Heartbreaking indeed... There are comments that I've heard over the course of the last week which stand out.

I apologize for not remembering the details, but can't remember which child it was, but a family member was saying that their little brother couldn't understand why he couldn't play with his best friend anymore. Having little kids of my own, I can't imagine the heartbreak that these parents are going through, not only for their huge loss, but to deal with seeing their other children going through this as well.

That is heartbreaking. I heard about a little girl who had survived the shooting and told her mom she was ok, but that all her friends were dead. It's so painful to hear this reports. It makes the horror and grief just so palpable.

Hugh Freaking Dillon

comebackgirl wrote:

I heard about a little girl who had survived the shooting and told her mom she was ok, but that all her friends were dead.

oh good god.

pureoc

Wow. Definitely made me tear up. So sad.

chadwick

i can't even read the letter. eyes are screwed..........

catefrances

gimmesometruth27 wrote:

brianlux wrote:

Thank you for an excellent and appropriate thread regarding the Newtown incident, Gimme. Young John's letter is very heartbreaking indeed.

that letter is so sad. so short, so direct and to the point, so simple.

i tried to think back to when i was six and at that those would have been the only things i could have said in that situation as well. at that age those thoughts and feelings were really all i knew.

i live with a 6 year old and last week at her maternal great grandmothers funeral she wrapped her arms around her poppys neck and said."im gonna give you a hug cause your mummy died".

i love how little kids just say what they mean cause its what theyre feeling or thinking. i wish that directness wants something we sometimes tried to avoid as we get older for fear of hurting someones feelings... when sometimes its exactly whats needed.

chadwick

pandora wrote:

Prayers so soothing. Dr. Phil mentioned that faith will help the victims young and old
get through this. It really helps to know you can talk to your loved ones passed.
This expression so healing.

what?

chadwick

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

I don't know how much more of this I can take.

yeah same here. im over here crying like a baby after reading the boy's note to his friend. this is one fucking crazy ass society we live in. now numb i feel like crying myself to sleep.

catefrances

i heard about one little girl who said to her mother that she was okay but all her friends were dead. it just breaks my heart.

dimitrispearljam

catefrances wrote:

i heard about one little girl who said to her mother that she was okay but all her friends were dead. it just breaks my heart.

........

chadwick

catefrances wrote:

i heard about one little girl who said to her mother that she was okay but all her friends were dead. it just breaks my heart.

all this stuff is just kickin my ass bad... fuck i really can't take much more of it. yet i am dealing with nothing in comparison. sad fucking days/nights. this country, this world's people have huge problems when we kill and kill and kill one another & wipe out classrooms of small children just starting out in life. what the fuck is truly going on here? this is the saddest bunch of bullshit i've ever experienced

Loulou

catefrances wrote:

i heard about one little girl who said to her mother that she was okay but all her friends were dead. it just breaks my heart.

Awful, just awful. How the hell is that going to psychologically effect those children? How on earth could you get your kids to go BACK to school? Terrible..

catefrances

Loulou wrote:

catefrances wrote:

i heard about one little girl who said to her mother that she was okay but all her friends were dead. it just breaks my heart.

Awful, just awful. How the hell is that going to psychologically effect those children? How on earth could you get your kids to go BACK to school? Terrible..

i think about that all the time. i find myself stealing glances at the toddlermonster(who has just finished her first year of school) and thinking how she would cope... how we would cope... and how the community would cope if such a heinous thing happened in our school. but i draw a blank cause its just so incomprehensible. and then my thoughts wander back to newtown.

Hugh Freaking Dillon

I think about that too. How my sweet Katie (6) would deal with her two best friends, and all of her other friends, being dead all of a sudden. I think she'd be damaged psychologically for good. that's not, by FAR, a normal childhood experience.

My little Samantha (3) breaks out in tears if she doesn't get a hug from me before I leave for work every morning. I can't imagine the despair of losing her best friend/big sister.

I need to go to bed. I feel like I need to do something. I don't know what.

Byrnzie

pandora wrote:

Prayers so soothing. Dr. Phil mentioned that faith will help the victims young and old
get through this. It really helps to know you can talk to your loved ones passed.
This expression so healing.

No offence, but this really takes the meaning of 'gibberish' to a whole new level.

gimmesometruth27

Byrnzie wrote:

pandora wrote:

Prayers so soothing. Dr. Phil mentioned that faith will help the victims young and old
get through this. It really helps to know you can talk to your loved ones passed.
This expression so healing.

No offence, but this really takes the meaning of 'gibberish' to a whole new level.

yeah i would like to see prayers sooth these children.

all they know is they were in a room, got shot at, and they are still alive and some of their friends are not. and jesus, who is supposed to love children, did nothing to stop it. no prayer is going to soothe that. why would they pray to someone who is supposed to love and protect them? especially in a 6 year old where they do not have the life experiences to cope and they do not have any sort of perspective to help them deal with it. thanks for nothing dr phil..

cincybearcat

gimmesometruth27 wrote:

Byrnzie wrote:

pandora wrote:

Prayers so soothing. Dr. Phil mentioned that faith will help the victims young and old
get through this. It really helps to know you can talk to your loved ones passed.
This expression so healing.

No offence, but this really takes the meaning of 'gibberish' to a whole new level.

yeah i would like to see prayers sooth these children.

Well, if they and their families are religious I do hope it helps comfort them. Believing in god and an afterlife I imagine could help comfort in a situation like this. You could feel like you are really talking to your friend during prayer and feel at least somewhat ok that they ended up in a very good place. So writing it off seems pretty callous. Obviously because you don't believe it wouldn't provide any comfort, but not everyone thinks exactly like you do.

This is such a ridiculously terrible situation. I hope some good actions and change come from this. WHo knows, maybe this is the tipping point. I want something good to come from it, those kids deserved far better and they certainly deserve better from us and our government.

gimmesometruth27

cincybearcat wrote:

Well, if they and their families are religious I do hope it helps comfort them. Believing in god and an afterlife I imagine could help comfort in a situation like this. You could feel like you are really talking to your friend during prayer and feel at least somewhat ok that they ended up in a very good place. So writing it off seems pretty callous. Obviously because you don't believe it wouldn't provide any comfort, but not everyone thinks exactly like you do.

This is such a ridiculously terrible situation. I hope some good actions and change come from this. Who knows, maybe this is the tipping point. I want something good to come from it, those kids deserved far better and they certainly deserve better from us and our government.

maybe you are right cincy. i had a lot of friends die when i was a kid. one got hit by a car when i was 9. one blew his head off at 14 when i was 12. one had leukemia and died at 13. one died of throat and tongue cancer at 19. i was raised catholic and i was raised to pray every night. i prayed to all of them. it helped me to fall asleep, but when i woke up the pain of their loss and the feelings of abandonment were still there. and i carried that pain with me for a long, long time. i could not imagine being 6. nine was too young for me to experience a schoolmate's death.

something good has to come from it. no kid should ever have to experience this, and going forward hopefully none of them will.

hedonist

cincybearcat wrote:

Well, if they and their families are religious I do hope it helps comfort them. Believing in god and an afterlife I imagine could help comfort in a situation like this. You could feel like you are really talking to your friend during prayer and feel at least somewhat ok that they ended up in a very good place. So writing it off seems pretty callous. Obviously because you don't believe it wouldn't provide any comfort, but not everyone thinks exactly like you do.

Watching the news this morning, I saw an interview with a boy in Newtown, maybe nine or ten, saying how praying was helping him and making the ordeal just a little less horrific. Good for him, and for whomever else turns to whatever peaceful means they have to cope.

(edit - to gimme, I just read your other post up there, and while I don't think praying, religion, whatever, takes all the pain away, it can help in that moment; better than no reprieve at all)

Zoso

So sad : (

comebackgirl

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

I think about that too. How my sweet Katie (6) would deal with her two best friends, and all of her other friends, being dead all of a sudden. I think she'd be damaged psychologically for good. that's not, by FAR, a normal childhood experience.

My little Samantha (3) breaks out in tears if she doesn't get a hug from me before I leave for work every morning. I can't imagine the despair of losing her best friend/big sister.

I need to go to bed. I feel like I need to do something. I don't know what.

It's definitely not a normal childhood experience. Such horror for them to have to experience first hand. Many of them will experience survivor's guilt. It will be a long road ahead in terms of healing, but it is good to see so many people rallying around to support them. I hope that support doesn't fade away. The grief will continue for some time.



I'm not a religious person and I don't pray and I'm uncertain about an afterlife, but what has helped me after a loss is remembering that my relationship with the person doesn't just go away. I can still have conversations with them and I know exactly what they would say in response, what their expression and demeanor would be, how they would look and how it would feel to talk to them again...and I don't have to give that up. My relationship with them isn't gone, it's just different. I think that's maybe what Pandora was referring to, and I have also found it helpful.