My Lenghty/Personal Letterman Review
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In two parts:
“Letterman Post-Show Review” 5/5/06
Well, it’s about 24 hours after we started waiting in line at the Roseland Ballroom, but I think I’ll start at the beginning.
The first thing I have to talk about is fate. There’s no way I’m just this lucky to have gotten tickets for this – to see Pearl Jam in the Ed Sullivan Theatre on a beautiful day in New York with a friend who loves the band as much as I do. I don’t want to believe the “karma pendulum” either, because, well, when it swings back, it’s gonna be hard.
The day started off well. Got up at 5:30 AM, ate something, got my roommate up to give me and my friend a ride to the train station in Lancaster. When we got in the car, a commercial was finishing up, the last ten seconds or so and then comes on, and there’s no way I could be making this up, Jeremy. If I needed any proof that the stars were aligning…that was it.
Ended up taking the bus to New York, a little bit longer, but a little bit cheaper than the train. My friend hadn’t actually seen the new album yet, so I showed her on the bus. She liked the cover, but… Yeah, I’m still trying to figure out the inside too, but…we gave it a spin even though I had promised myself a few days before to go on a PJ hiatus until the show. We started on “Come Back,” and then went to the beginning and listened straight through. She liked “Unemployable” and “Inside Job” the best, having already heard the first few songs before.
We finally got to New York and took the subway down to her dorm room at NYU. I had been to the dorm on 10th St. before, which was kind of a dump. It must have been an old hotel, since each room had it’s own bathroom right in front when you walked in. She lives a little further downtown and she had told me about the view before, but… When you walk in, you can see City Hall, the Empire State Building and the Brooklyn Bridge, just like that. I seriously just kind of sat there and drooled for about an hour or two while she did some little errands. To a dumb hick from upstate, the view just blew me away.
So we left and she had some more errands to run, buying some film for a documentary she’s going to make in Paris. Must be nice… More errands, running around NYU campus, right near Washington Square Park, we passed the infamous Tower Records a few times there on 4th St. Ate some Thai food for lunch, which was good too. Met a bunch of decent people I’ll never see again, all of her friends there for the semester, which was kind of strange, but OK. It was fun.
FINALLY – we took the subway up to 59th St., figured we’d just take the express and walk the seven blocks down to Roseland. Also got some ice cream just in the park, right near Columbus Circle. Again, it was beautiful and sunny, and it turned to soup pretty quick. Just about 4 O’clock we got down to 52nd St., and saw the line in front of Roseland. It was a nice little walk to the end of the line – checking out everyone’s choice of T-shirt. I had on my navy blue “sternum Yield sign” shirt and a corduroy shirt a size or two too small, sleeves rolled up. She had on her blue and yellow checkered shirt – kind of grungy – I liked it.
We waited and talked, which was fun, chatting it up with some of our neighbors in line. Kind of felt a little out of place – part of the younger generation of PJ fans, but it was good. About 4:25, joked “this waiting stinks, let’s just go.” That got a good reaction from the guy and his girlfriend/wife in front of us. About 4:30 we got inside the Roseland, and they were really organized. Had my driver’s license, got on the list, and got tickets # 173 and 174. Which was just under halfway, so we were figuring for a half hour wait, our seats wouldn’t be bad at all. Little did we know…
They lined us up in the Roseland; it was dark and cold, which was nice. The guy behind us in line was talking about how we saw the Violent Femmes and Primus (twice!) play this room and about how he got sucked into the pit for a awhile. You could hear the subway underneath every once in a while, which was neat too. We waited and waited and finally just sat down, and a bunch of other people followed suit. Again, FINALLY, there were some rumblings up ahead and we got ushered out in two groups, under 200 first, and the higher numbers later.
At this point it was basically a Ten Club parade over 52nd St to Broadway and then up a block to the Ed Sullivan Theatre. Some people behind us got stuck at the crosswalk, but I think they made it…eventually.
Yet another line, this time right outside the Ed Sullivan, they let a bunch of people in early, but we waited another ten minutes or so outside, my hands were sweating, I remember that. I don’t remember talking much here. Too nervous or something. They let us in to the theatre, and we have to scramble though this maze of lines they had set up, it was like the bank or DMV line from hell. I was getting dizzy about halfway though. And the Letterman staffers kept yelling “tickets out!” Once they took a break for about five seconds, two guys started yelling, “tickets out!” and everyone started laughing. Once the Letterman girl said it again about ten seconds later, the laughter was even louder.
Finally we get into the theatre, my mind’s going about eight million miles per second now. This place is small! Way smaller than on TV! They wrangled us off to the right, Stone’s side, and we get down the aisle, and WE’RE FIFTH ROW, RIGHT IN FRONT OF DAVE’S DESK! At this point, I just couldn’t control myself, really, just looking at how close the stage was. I can imagine the smile on my face was just huge… I was looking at my friend; we were both just going nuts. In disbelief. I can’t even explain. You just felt like you could reach out and touch Matt’s kit or something.
All of the real die-hards who had been waiting in line all day got the center section, and the camera boom was kind of in the way for some of the show for those on the side… but they had a straight-on incredible view. They all had “LEASH” written on 8x11 paper too…they were waving them around. One of the crew came out and held up a sign about ten minutes before show time, just in sight, right around the corner from backstage – it was the one Ed held up in the middle of the show – “Leash will not be played tonight.” The crowd kind of booed and laughed and went nuts, you could see the crew was having a blast in the background with it. We were sitting there, just laughing and smiling and throwing our hands up, just incredulous. All of a sudden, right in that same spot, Matt came out, I kind of yelled and pointed and everyone went crazy again. You could see Jeff and Stone too, and then Ed just kind of ran out and it started.
Wow. He had a bottle of wine, which was a very good sign! I think he said something about “If this feels special to you, know it’s feeling special to us as well.” He also said, “I don’t know what you had to do to get tickets,” which got a good laugh from everyone. And then he picked up his tele and the ebow and you just knew World Wide Suicide was gonna fuckin rock.
They played a bunch of the new stuff early, which was good. I’m still not diggin Comatose all the much, but screamed along anyway. Can I say again how awesome this venue was? That was the closest I’m ever going to get… Still in shock and forgetting too much at this point…shit!
I also laughed pretty good at Ed’s intro to Severed Hand, as a song about “Psychotropics.” I wonder if you can hear me on the webcast… No one else really seemed to get it – but I really liked Stone’s explanation of it in that interview, just a song about “saying fuck it, I’m gonna go get drunk.” It’s not about hopelessness, it’s about frustration, and just wanting to escape but not run away forever. It’s clutch, Mike was nasty at the end, but turned down too low as usual. It’s still the same song as Porch though, which kind of pisses me of....
Oh, and Boom was there! That got a big “BOOM!!!!!” from the crowd as he emerged, and it was good to see him back with the band. Ed introduced Marker in the Sand as some sort of “church music, or that’s what it sounds like at the end.” I laughed pretty good at his comment that Boom is there for the “Pentecostal sound” at the end. I was finding this one difficult to get into too – as it’s not your typical Jeff song, but man, the ending really is triumphant. Boom sounded great – just an essential layer to the sound.
Gone was great, but I think Ed had a little trouble with the chorus and the “Who tag” at the end. It’s the same chord as In Hiding on that chorus and it’s going to be hard to hit live, but the crowd really filled in. That’s going to be a great live moment this tour, 20,000 people on the chorus to that – “I’m Gone, so long…” I really like this one a lot. I could see Ed doing it as a preset solo or with the band too – kind of like Parting Ways or some of those songs that can go either way – Dead Man.
Unemployable was real good. This just might be my favorite on number 8. Matt just writes great songs, just the sound is so weird and twisted, but it fits. I don’t know… The subject matter really hits it for me too, which is always nice. Stone was really grooving on the rhythm part, it’s kind of similar to Cropduster, to me, the pattern. But what another great sing along! All the oohs and ahhs…it was great to have the whole theatre filled with everyone singing. It was really intense. So hot in there too – you could just see the steam coming off of all of us, singing along so loud and jumping and dancing. Just looking around every once in a while, it was synchronized – the faithful, just amazing.
Finally we get into some old ones. Mike strapped on his yellow, glow in the dark, flying V and when he hit that first note of Present Tense, I almost lost it. I really needed this one for so long…just kind of forgot about it, thinking they’d never play it here. Ed turned the mic around for the crowd, and we fuckin let loose, which was another great feeling. Ed had his Rickenbacker on, a nice little subtle tribute to George Harrison there. More later on the Beatles thing.
Now here comes the one thing I’m always going to remember, even if it’s a fabrication. In the second verse, there’s the line “checked your hands and studied the lines.” I always loved that, because the whole song’s about the present, but the lines on the hands works both ways – future telling and wrinkles. To me it’s just a great summation of those times you just sit and ponder about everything other than the now, here and there, the future and the past, all that stuff. Right before it comes, he’s looking right my way, I swear to God, and I’m staring straight back. As he starts to sing it, I kind of hold my hand up and look down at it, and then look back up after he’s sung the line and he’s still staring right at me. No nods or smiles I could pick up, but just that connection that I felt, man… It was unreal. I was floating on air the rest of the song, and the ending thrash and jam was just unbelievable…so tight and … I don’t know… Incredible.
When I heard the first two notes of DTE, I fuckin screamed out “yeah,” and kind of heard how quiet it was in the theatre in the split second afterward. So if you hear that, it must be me yelling, and I was glad to get the one Yield song, although it’s far from Low Light or In Hiding. The thing about this one was Stone’s face during the “hallelujah” part. Just eyes squeezed closed and teeth bared, it was just classic Stone goofing off. That’s just so funny looking, good to hear hit rip it on the solo too.
Then there was the whole little “Leash” escapade; I could have sworn I saw Jeff say, “let’s play it!” I’m sure they’re soundchecking it right now at Irving Plaza…you lucky bastards. But I am too! WHY GO!
How fuckin excited is everyone that this one is back? SHE WAS DIAGNOSED BY SOME STUPID FUCK! What a great sing along – scream along – and we were all thinking “WHY GO HOME?” ourselves, hoping they’d stretch it out for a good long while or an encore of some sorts.
Then Porch hits, and I’m like, wait, we already heard Severed Hand… No, but it had that little funky Ed intro on the tele…oh man, that’s just what it needed to stay fresh after all these years. We’re all kind of waiting for the solo; Mike goes behind his head, all up and down the fretboard. Let me say he was jumping all the fuck over the place all night, which was just incredible. Flinging picks and making faces, man, Mike was fuckin on. Shredding. OK, now Ed’s ranting part…thinking maybe something about the war here in the bridge but he does “I wanna hold your hand” which, needless to say, I followed his lead, which made for a very fitting end to the show. And what a fuckin venue. Oh, I got memories, I got shit.
During the Daltry mic swing at the end, Ed let go at the wrong point, after screaming the “ever again” part to the first row of the balcony about five feet away from the first row on the floor. Amazing…so fuckin intense. So close… Anyway, when he lets go, rather than go straight up so he can catch it on the way down it goes straight back, right between Jeff and Mike and Mike nearly got clobbered, but scowls at Ed and just looks at Jeff and laughs it off. Ed mumbled some thanks and they left the stage, Matt was waving wildly, beaming, likes he does, which was great. Ed ran back for his wine and notebook. We were all up and asking for more, but the crew started putting away the equipment, and exhausted and spent, we all filed out of the theatre.
“Letterman Post-Show Review” 5/5/06
Well, it’s about 24 hours after we started waiting in line at the Roseland Ballroom, but I think I’ll start at the beginning.
The first thing I have to talk about is fate. There’s no way I’m just this lucky to have gotten tickets for this – to see Pearl Jam in the Ed Sullivan Theatre on a beautiful day in New York with a friend who loves the band as much as I do. I don’t want to believe the “karma pendulum” either, because, well, when it swings back, it’s gonna be hard.
The day started off well. Got up at 5:30 AM, ate something, got my roommate up to give me and my friend a ride to the train station in Lancaster. When we got in the car, a commercial was finishing up, the last ten seconds or so and then comes on, and there’s no way I could be making this up, Jeremy. If I needed any proof that the stars were aligning…that was it.
Ended up taking the bus to New York, a little bit longer, but a little bit cheaper than the train. My friend hadn’t actually seen the new album yet, so I showed her on the bus. She liked the cover, but… Yeah, I’m still trying to figure out the inside too, but…we gave it a spin even though I had promised myself a few days before to go on a PJ hiatus until the show. We started on “Come Back,” and then went to the beginning and listened straight through. She liked “Unemployable” and “Inside Job” the best, having already heard the first few songs before.
We finally got to New York and took the subway down to her dorm room at NYU. I had been to the dorm on 10th St. before, which was kind of a dump. It must have been an old hotel, since each room had it’s own bathroom right in front when you walked in. She lives a little further downtown and she had told me about the view before, but… When you walk in, you can see City Hall, the Empire State Building and the Brooklyn Bridge, just like that. I seriously just kind of sat there and drooled for about an hour or two while she did some little errands. To a dumb hick from upstate, the view just blew me away.
So we left and she had some more errands to run, buying some film for a documentary she’s going to make in Paris. Must be nice… More errands, running around NYU campus, right near Washington Square Park, we passed the infamous Tower Records a few times there on 4th St. Ate some Thai food for lunch, which was good too. Met a bunch of decent people I’ll never see again, all of her friends there for the semester, which was kind of strange, but OK. It was fun.
FINALLY – we took the subway up to 59th St., figured we’d just take the express and walk the seven blocks down to Roseland. Also got some ice cream just in the park, right near Columbus Circle. Again, it was beautiful and sunny, and it turned to soup pretty quick. Just about 4 O’clock we got down to 52nd St., and saw the line in front of Roseland. It was a nice little walk to the end of the line – checking out everyone’s choice of T-shirt. I had on my navy blue “sternum Yield sign” shirt and a corduroy shirt a size or two too small, sleeves rolled up. She had on her blue and yellow checkered shirt – kind of grungy – I liked it.
We waited and talked, which was fun, chatting it up with some of our neighbors in line. Kind of felt a little out of place – part of the younger generation of PJ fans, but it was good. About 4:25, joked “this waiting stinks, let’s just go.” That got a good reaction from the guy and his girlfriend/wife in front of us. About 4:30 we got inside the Roseland, and they were really organized. Had my driver’s license, got on the list, and got tickets # 173 and 174. Which was just under halfway, so we were figuring for a half hour wait, our seats wouldn’t be bad at all. Little did we know…
They lined us up in the Roseland; it was dark and cold, which was nice. The guy behind us in line was talking about how we saw the Violent Femmes and Primus (twice!) play this room and about how he got sucked into the pit for a awhile. You could hear the subway underneath every once in a while, which was neat too. We waited and waited and finally just sat down, and a bunch of other people followed suit. Again, FINALLY, there were some rumblings up ahead and we got ushered out in two groups, under 200 first, and the higher numbers later.
At this point it was basically a Ten Club parade over 52nd St to Broadway and then up a block to the Ed Sullivan Theatre. Some people behind us got stuck at the crosswalk, but I think they made it…eventually.
Yet another line, this time right outside the Ed Sullivan, they let a bunch of people in early, but we waited another ten minutes or so outside, my hands were sweating, I remember that. I don’t remember talking much here. Too nervous or something. They let us in to the theatre, and we have to scramble though this maze of lines they had set up, it was like the bank or DMV line from hell. I was getting dizzy about halfway though. And the Letterman staffers kept yelling “tickets out!” Once they took a break for about five seconds, two guys started yelling, “tickets out!” and everyone started laughing. Once the Letterman girl said it again about ten seconds later, the laughter was even louder.
Finally we get into the theatre, my mind’s going about eight million miles per second now. This place is small! Way smaller than on TV! They wrangled us off to the right, Stone’s side, and we get down the aisle, and WE’RE FIFTH ROW, RIGHT IN FRONT OF DAVE’S DESK! At this point, I just couldn’t control myself, really, just looking at how close the stage was. I can imagine the smile on my face was just huge… I was looking at my friend; we were both just going nuts. In disbelief. I can’t even explain. You just felt like you could reach out and touch Matt’s kit or something.
All of the real die-hards who had been waiting in line all day got the center section, and the camera boom was kind of in the way for some of the show for those on the side… but they had a straight-on incredible view. They all had “LEASH” written on 8x11 paper too…they were waving them around. One of the crew came out and held up a sign about ten minutes before show time, just in sight, right around the corner from backstage – it was the one Ed held up in the middle of the show – “Leash will not be played tonight.” The crowd kind of booed and laughed and went nuts, you could see the crew was having a blast in the background with it. We were sitting there, just laughing and smiling and throwing our hands up, just incredulous. All of a sudden, right in that same spot, Matt came out, I kind of yelled and pointed and everyone went crazy again. You could see Jeff and Stone too, and then Ed just kind of ran out and it started.
Wow. He had a bottle of wine, which was a very good sign! I think he said something about “If this feels special to you, know it’s feeling special to us as well.” He also said, “I don’t know what you had to do to get tickets,” which got a good laugh from everyone. And then he picked up his tele and the ebow and you just knew World Wide Suicide was gonna fuckin rock.
They played a bunch of the new stuff early, which was good. I’m still not diggin Comatose all the much, but screamed along anyway. Can I say again how awesome this venue was? That was the closest I’m ever going to get… Still in shock and forgetting too much at this point…shit!
I also laughed pretty good at Ed’s intro to Severed Hand, as a song about “Psychotropics.” I wonder if you can hear me on the webcast… No one else really seemed to get it – but I really liked Stone’s explanation of it in that interview, just a song about “saying fuck it, I’m gonna go get drunk.” It’s not about hopelessness, it’s about frustration, and just wanting to escape but not run away forever. It’s clutch, Mike was nasty at the end, but turned down too low as usual. It’s still the same song as Porch though, which kind of pisses me of....
Oh, and Boom was there! That got a big “BOOM!!!!!” from the crowd as he emerged, and it was good to see him back with the band. Ed introduced Marker in the Sand as some sort of “church music, or that’s what it sounds like at the end.” I laughed pretty good at his comment that Boom is there for the “Pentecostal sound” at the end. I was finding this one difficult to get into too – as it’s not your typical Jeff song, but man, the ending really is triumphant. Boom sounded great – just an essential layer to the sound.
Gone was great, but I think Ed had a little trouble with the chorus and the “Who tag” at the end. It’s the same chord as In Hiding on that chorus and it’s going to be hard to hit live, but the crowd really filled in. That’s going to be a great live moment this tour, 20,000 people on the chorus to that – “I’m Gone, so long…” I really like this one a lot. I could see Ed doing it as a preset solo or with the band too – kind of like Parting Ways or some of those songs that can go either way – Dead Man.
Unemployable was real good. This just might be my favorite on number 8. Matt just writes great songs, just the sound is so weird and twisted, but it fits. I don’t know… The subject matter really hits it for me too, which is always nice. Stone was really grooving on the rhythm part, it’s kind of similar to Cropduster, to me, the pattern. But what another great sing along! All the oohs and ahhs…it was great to have the whole theatre filled with everyone singing. It was really intense. So hot in there too – you could just see the steam coming off of all of us, singing along so loud and jumping and dancing. Just looking around every once in a while, it was synchronized – the faithful, just amazing.
Finally we get into some old ones. Mike strapped on his yellow, glow in the dark, flying V and when he hit that first note of Present Tense, I almost lost it. I really needed this one for so long…just kind of forgot about it, thinking they’d never play it here. Ed turned the mic around for the crowd, and we fuckin let loose, which was another great feeling. Ed had his Rickenbacker on, a nice little subtle tribute to George Harrison there. More later on the Beatles thing.
Now here comes the one thing I’m always going to remember, even if it’s a fabrication. In the second verse, there’s the line “checked your hands and studied the lines.” I always loved that, because the whole song’s about the present, but the lines on the hands works both ways – future telling and wrinkles. To me it’s just a great summation of those times you just sit and ponder about everything other than the now, here and there, the future and the past, all that stuff. Right before it comes, he’s looking right my way, I swear to God, and I’m staring straight back. As he starts to sing it, I kind of hold my hand up and look down at it, and then look back up after he’s sung the line and he’s still staring right at me. No nods or smiles I could pick up, but just that connection that I felt, man… It was unreal. I was floating on air the rest of the song, and the ending thrash and jam was just unbelievable…so tight and … I don’t know… Incredible.
When I heard the first two notes of DTE, I fuckin screamed out “yeah,” and kind of heard how quiet it was in the theatre in the split second afterward. So if you hear that, it must be me yelling, and I was glad to get the one Yield song, although it’s far from Low Light or In Hiding. The thing about this one was Stone’s face during the “hallelujah” part. Just eyes squeezed closed and teeth bared, it was just classic Stone goofing off. That’s just so funny looking, good to hear hit rip it on the solo too.
Then there was the whole little “Leash” escapade; I could have sworn I saw Jeff say, “let’s play it!” I’m sure they’re soundchecking it right now at Irving Plaza…you lucky bastards. But I am too! WHY GO!
How fuckin excited is everyone that this one is back? SHE WAS DIAGNOSED BY SOME STUPID FUCK! What a great sing along – scream along – and we were all thinking “WHY GO HOME?” ourselves, hoping they’d stretch it out for a good long while or an encore of some sorts.
Then Porch hits, and I’m like, wait, we already heard Severed Hand… No, but it had that little funky Ed intro on the tele…oh man, that’s just what it needed to stay fresh after all these years. We’re all kind of waiting for the solo; Mike goes behind his head, all up and down the fretboard. Let me say he was jumping all the fuck over the place all night, which was just incredible. Flinging picks and making faces, man, Mike was fuckin on. Shredding. OK, now Ed’s ranting part…thinking maybe something about the war here in the bridge but he does “I wanna hold your hand” which, needless to say, I followed his lead, which made for a very fitting end to the show. And what a fuckin venue. Oh, I got memories, I got shit.
During the Daltry mic swing at the end, Ed let go at the wrong point, after screaming the “ever again” part to the first row of the balcony about five feet away from the first row on the floor. Amazing…so fuckin intense. So close… Anyway, when he lets go, rather than go straight up so he can catch it on the way down it goes straight back, right between Jeff and Mike and Mike nearly got clobbered, but scowls at Ed and just looks at Jeff and laughs it off. Ed mumbled some thanks and they left the stage, Matt was waving wildly, beaming, likes he does, which was great. Ed ran back for his wine and notebook. We were all up and asking for more, but the crew started putting away the equipment, and exhausted and spent, we all filed out of the theatre.
Teamwork. Rawk. Pwnage. Infinite Possibilities. YIELD. Hells yeah.
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We headed the wrong way, downtown instead of heading back up to the 59th St. station. I had in the back of my mind the intention to wait outside the back door and catch the guys on the way out, but my friend’s friends from school were all leaving for the semester the next day and she wanted to see them one last time. So we were kind of in a time crunch to get back downtown. We saw everybody standing and figured we’d wait a bit. After about 15 minutes, about 7:15, I said, “we should just go, it’s not a big deal to me.” But my friend said we should wait until 7:30…and lo and behold, right at 7:30, out come Matt and Jeff. Both were really friendly, but we were kind of in the back, maybe seven feet away. My friend climbed up on the barricade rung to get a good look, I’m pretty tall, so it was great. I just yelled “Thanks, Jeff” about three times; they were signing some autographs and shaking hands. Ed ran out real quick, handed someone his wine and got in the van. Boom came out too, again, “BOOM!,” but I don’t remember seeing Mike or Stone at all. Anyway, it was kind of this fate thing again – the “time limit” came at the right time.
So we headed back up Broadway to 59th and saw this guy and his girlfriend heading south asking if any of the guys came out. We told them Matt and Jeff were really nice, and they kept on walking – it was neat we all kind of recognized each other, they were just ahead of us in the line. Then my friend got really flustered, saying, “that was my chance to tell Jeff I love him.” Which I thought was really funny, that little girl’s obsessive reaction, but she was really serious and I knew it was worth it waiting another half an hour out there on the New York streets, just so we could see them for a minute or two. Again. But now you just knew that the high was coming down, that it was over…kind of a depressing but glorious feeling at the same time.
…
Back at the dorm, I just kind of stared at the view again, this time at night, it was unbelievable…just the city at night all lit up. She had to go work on her screenplay which was due the next day, problem was she had used up all the memory on her computer and it wouldn’t let her save the document, the internet stopped working and it wouldn’t even save it to my USB drive I had brought with me for home. So she was freaking out about that too…I tired to help, but just really didn’t want to interfere too much…she’s just so independent, she needed the space more than the support. It was tough.
I sat there and wrote a few pages of stream of consciousness stuff in one of her notebooks. I just realized I totally forgot to rip that out. Shit. Oh, well. It’s all true if she reads it anyway…
Went to sleep on some stranger’s bed…he (another roommate) was going out with her roommate, so didn’t use his own bed much anymore. His roommate came back later; I was already passed out, but not asleep. Brooklyn Bridge traffic, the whole day keeping me awake. Too much to think about. Waiting for so long for this. I remember watching Jeremy on TV when I was in what, first, second grade? Even Flow and Alive on the radio…Daughter, just everything though the years. Seeing them in Philly back in October. My friend and I “meeting” because of our Pearl Jam collections on iTunes – living in the same dorm, we could see each other’s libraries…being in the same class…she said she used to ask people if their name was Will and if they liked Pearl Jam, just out of the blue, not knowing what I looked like. I wonder if it was disappointing when she found out who I was. Just all of this fate tied up together. Led to me lying there on some stranger’s bed. Listening to the traffic cross the bridge. I guess I drifted off of mental exhaustion at some point…my brain just had done too much for one day. One of those weird realizations that there are so many days we have, just going though the routine, not remembering a thing about them. And then there’s a few days just so packed with life, you remember every second. (Or try to write it down later…) It was one of those, for sure.
Woke up about seven AM. Kind of rolled around in bed for an hour, listening to the road of the morning rush hour – sounded like the ocean. The big wave of people coming in for the day, the tide rushing out again at night. A constant din – such a strange thing for me to hear. I’ll bet they don’t even hear it after a week of living there. It’s just too loud in that city, you can’t have a conversation walking down most streets, not on the subway. Elevators are good though. Nice and quiet.
Sat and stared out the window again. Put some clothes on. She got up about nine, I had a little conversation with her roommate in the meantime. Grabbed my stuff, headed up to NYU on the subway one last time. Had to go to the computer store to get her computer fixed, but there was no way they could do anything soon. She’s leaving in a few weeks, so that was not going to happen. She just needed to restart it, but couldn’t because she couldn’t save the document. More frustrations. Computer problems always happen at the worst times too. Murphy’s law.
Picked up some breakfast, scone and a black coffee, right near that Tower Records on 4th St. Went back to Washington Square Park and ate. We people watched. I tried to reassure her, tell her it’d all work out, just to think positively. “That’s what my dad told me,” she said. Good advice, still, I think.
She talked about her screenplay. I liked all the twists. She asked me if this quote made sense, something about remembering and forgetting…things we should and shouldn’t. I said yeah, that makes sense, “I like it.” “I wrote it.” Wow. And the whole theme of the thing, the last day or so…it was just too fitting. And I’m still not sure if she had that in mind, or it was just conversation.
She had to go type the screenplay… We said we’d meet at one in front of the Tisch building. I walked all around the village, and then sat in Washington Square again by myself and then headed up to 14th St, just to say that I saw Irving Plaza from the outside. Mismanaged my time, planned to get back early, but got back just at one. Which would’ve been fine, but she was waiting for me. I really hated to be wasting her time at this point. I knew I just had to leave and let her get on with life. I had lived mine the night before…I’m sure she did too, but just couldn’t concentrate on it, focus. I’m just too lucky. It’s not fair.
She was waiting and said she had too much to do and couldn’t hang out. Which was fine, I needed to get out of her hair anyway. So we split ways, which was funny, because when I had visited her earlier in New York, we said goodbye almost at the same exact spot. 4th and East Washington Square. It’s a very sad little corner for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever see it again. Not sure if I want to. The corner of goodbyes. I think there’s a street of hellos somewhere else though. I hope.
…
Well, I’ve got Albany to look forward to in a week. I’ve got 10 Club seats…but it just won’t compare. The Ed Sullivan gig. And I was there. We were there. Why go home? Such a good call on their part, scratching Alive for that. Present Tense! I studied the lines a bunch those few days in New York. A very crucial span of time for me. I really like an interview Ed did for this record, basically calling music “his heroin.” The live shows were just so addicting and the bootlegs were the quick fix that held you over until the next one. But there’s nothing that fills the void the next day. Maybe nothing other than spending the whole day thinking about the show the night before, writing it down. Making some more lines there on your hands – setting the path for what’s to come in the future. Checked my hands and studied the lines. I wanna hold your hand. And help you through it. And the Beatles and the history, and… my life. I just wanna hold your hand. And I did. I got memories…
Too much emotionally for one day. Just way too much. Enough for a lifetime in one spin of the earth.
And the fate thing? When I got home on Friday, my dad was reading the paper, listening to the radio on the oldies station. What was the next full song that came on? The Beatles. I Want to Hold Your Hand. I can’t seriously make this up. It happened. It’s just too much. Just twenty. And that’s the top. All downhill from here. Must be fate…
LENGTHY
thank you....
Tosh
Sammi: Wanna just break up?
anyway, that was a really great review. i enjoyed reading it (not as much as i enjoyed being at the show but u know). thanks for sharing ur story!
I'm glad Ed didn't listen to Jeff on the Leash thing.
I think I heard Ed whisper to Jeff on the webcast "Jeff we're playing Leash at the Gorge remember"
Thank you..
Length is purely subjective..
Nice.
Who in their right mind would read all of that nonsense?
I'm a fast reader.
Say, who pissed in your beer tonight? And most nights?
I'm a compulsive writer...don't like pictures...so I just had to do this real quick the next day...just to cement in my mind what really happened...
R.i.p. My Dad - May 28, 2007
R.i.p. Black Tail (cat) - Sept. 20, 2008
comments are appreciated.
thanks,
blue arrow is me
http://edisk.fandm.edu/william.montgomery/files/Letterman.jpg