Satire - my attempt. Feedback appreciated!
sj.brodie
Posts: 468
I just wrote this and want to know - did it make you laugh? Also, I don't have a title so any suggestions are welcome!
POLITICAL SATIRE
(Boss) (viewing over lowered spectacles a scene below his 60 storey office building) "I demand to know...what is the immediate purpose of this cretinous and vulgar "Occupy Movement"? The youth of today should learn to embrace their corporate values!!" (tweaks moustache)
(Street Protestor # 1) "We are the ninety nine percent!" "Tax the super rich!"
(Street Protestor # 2) "Make jobs, not war!"
(Senior) "Boss, the Occupy movement lacks a coherent message."
(Protestors in unison) "THIS IS WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE!!"
(Boss) (adjusting trouser braces) "Anti Capitalist I'd say!! Bloody Marxists! They inherit ALL the virtues of free markets and still demand more!!"
(Senior) (hastily) "Yes, yes boss - meeting at 2:30, remember?"
(Boss) "Which meeting was that? Staff or bonuses?
(Senior) "Both."
(Boss) "Cull 10% and take your two million."
POLITICAL SATIRE
(Boss) (viewing over lowered spectacles a scene below his 60 storey office building) "I demand to know...what is the immediate purpose of this cretinous and vulgar "Occupy Movement"? The youth of today should learn to embrace their corporate values!!" (tweaks moustache)
(Street Protestor # 1) "We are the ninety nine percent!" "Tax the super rich!"
(Street Protestor # 2) "Make jobs, not war!"
(Senior) "Boss, the Occupy movement lacks a coherent message."
(Protestors in unison) "THIS IS WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE!!"
(Boss) (adjusting trouser braces) "Anti Capitalist I'd say!! Bloody Marxists! They inherit ALL the virtues of free markets and still demand more!!"
(Senior) (hastily) "Yes, yes boss - meeting at 2:30, remember?"
(Boss) "Which meeting was that? Staff or bonuses?
(Senior) "Both."
(Boss) "Cull 10% and take your two million."
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments
Oh well thank for your feedback.This is my first attempt to slay everyhing in my path that I hate by using black comedy! Nobody is immune really. Hoping to get it published.
so... question: you're calling this satire... a satirization of bankers? are bankers this thing you hate? is it your desire to satirize bankers using an anachronistic construct?
i've never tried writing satire...
Maybe hate was a strong word. I don't really hate bankers. I'm reying on strong use of irony, focusing on a specific profession which I think characterizes it as satire. But it isn't an attack on bankers. The protesters are also satirized to a lesser extent given their only part is to chant political slogans. BUT crucial to making this funny, I hope, is that there are relatable elements to it such as in dialogue, environment and relevance to current affairs.