Home› All Encompassing Trip

My Baby is Expecting ... and her Daddy

StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
edited February 2012 in All Encompassing Trip
her Daddy ... will never even know about it

so sad :( the entire situation

he let her down and screwed her over so many times throughout her young 22 years

and now that she has this joyous news

she is doing her best to keep it from him

she doesn't want him involved in her life or her baby's life

she doesn't even want him to know about it

and the look in her eyes when she talks about him is heart-breaking

the man has screwed no one more than himself in the long run

that's not entirely true though..because there is a set of grandparents who will never know their EDIT ~ Great-Grandchild either...since they have done nothing to reach out to her since the family broke up (so i guess i can't feel bad for them either...but god only knows what kind of crap he put into their heads...knowing that they believe absolutely everything their son ever said to them ... even if is far out and fantastic enough to be right out of a Stephen King novel)

i wish i could make it better for her

but all i can offer is my love and support...and let her cry on my shoulder when she stops being so brave on the outside

and it hurts even more when i realize that a lot of the blame is on myself for not kicking him to the curb a lot sooner than i did - but even after i finally did that didn't stop him from manipulating her every time he saw her

I feel so bad for her

I just wanted to let that out a little bit here, cuz I can't let it out anywhere else, really..and i know you guys are understanding ...so thanks for listening :)

On A Cheerier Note I Am....

ELATED EXCITED OVERJOYED HAPPY DELIGHTED ECSTATIC

and just plain

TICKLED PINK

about the baby :D
peace,
jo

http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
"How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
"Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • ClaireackClaireack Posts: 13,561
    Congratulations!

    Don't beat yourself up about the past though, we all do the best we can at the time.
    <a href="http://s952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/?action=view&current=domo.jpg&quot; target="_blank"><img src="http://i952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/domo.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    Claireack wrote:
    Congratulations!

    Don't beat yourself up about the past though, we all do the best we can at the time.

    thanks claire! I'm super excited!

    and i know that's true but her eyes just break my heart
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • RKCNDYRKCNDY Posts: 31,013
    Jo, don't feel bad for her daddy. He was responsible for his actions. I am sure that as a smart, mature woman, she tried to inform him that his actions have caused her pain yes/no?

    Some people are intent on making others miserable because for some reason, they are miserable themselves. Let him wallow in his misery, that is where he is happiest.

    I think that some people give others too many chances..."he cheated, but I forgive him" and then he cheats again, because he knows she will take him back...in essence, she is 'condoning' the cheating by constantly forgiving him....and yet, she wonders why he keeps cheating if he 'loves' her.

    The pain stops when you take a stand and say "it's not ok to hurt me"

    Be happy for your new grandbaby, be there to help her stand strong.
    The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

    - Christopher McCandless
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,875
    hedonist wrote:
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
    Exactly...

    Not tell the father is just immature, and cruel....

    Hope she doesnt plan on telling him in a few years....
    By sending someone to collect child support payments......
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • Black DiamondBlack Diamond Posts: 25,107
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
    Exactly...

    Not tell the father is just immature, and cruel....

    Hope she doesnt plan on telling him in a few years....
    By sending someone to collect child support payments......
    Not the father to be... the mother's to be father... Is what I am reading...
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,875
    Black Diamond wrote:
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
    Exactly...

    Not tell the father is just immature, and cruel....

    Hope she doesnt plan on telling him in a few years....
    By sending someone to collect child support payments......
    Not the father to be... the mother's to be father... Is what I am reading...
    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I stand corrected!!!!!!
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,875
    So it is BlackDiamond who has all the answers to all the questions!!!!!!!

    hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    RKCNDY wrote:
    Jo, don't feel bad for her daddy. He was responsible for his actions. I am sure that as a smart, mature woman, she tried to inform him that his actions have caused her pain yes/no?

    Some people are intent on making others miserable because for some reason, they are miserable themselves. Let him wallow in his misery, that is where he is happiest.

    I think that some people give others too many chances..."he cheated, but I forgive him" and then he cheats again, because he knows she will take him back...in essence, she is 'condoning' the cheating by constantly forgiving him....and yet, she wonders why he keeps cheating if he 'loves' her.

    The pain stops when you take a stand and say "it's not ok to hurt me"

    Be happy for your new grandbaby, be there to help her stand strong.

    oh lisa i do NOT feel bad for him but only for her

    but she is happy and we love her dearly

    thank you for your kind and wise words my friend :)
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
    Exactly...

    Not tell the father is just immature, and cruel....

    Hope she doesnt plan on telling him in a few years....
    By sending someone to collect child support payments......

    no no no!!

    you have misunderstood

    the baby's daddy knows all..he is here and very loving and very involved... oh yes..they have been together since she was 18

    it is my daughter's daddy...my ex husband who is in the dark

    per her wishes

    that's why i am so sad...for her ...after all, he is her daddy

    but...????
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,875
    StillHere wrote:
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I'm hesitant to tread on this ground, and ask this as a sincere question, not a judgment: Do you feel this young man is not entitled to know he will soon be a father?
    Exactly...

    Not tell the father is just immature, and cruel....

    Hope she doesnt plan on telling him in a few years....
    By sending someone to collect child support payments......

    no no no!!

    you have misunderstood

    the baby's daddy knows all..he is here and very loving and very involved... oh yes..they have been together since she was 18

    it is my daughter's daddy...my ex husband who is in the dark

    per her wishes

    that's why i am so sad...for her ...after all, he is her daddy

    but...????
    Im sorry...

    I read your original post a few times...
    And was convinced it was the baby's dad who was going to get shut out.....

    Guess I need more coffee.....hehehehe

    Congrats Grandma!!!
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    So it is BlackDiamond who has all the answers to all the questions!!!!!!!

    hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

    :thumbup:
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    Im sorry...

    I read your original post a few times...
    And was convinced it was the baby's dad who was going to get shut out.....

    Guess I need more coffee.....hehehehe

    Congrats Grandma!!!

    thanks Speedy!

    its ok i need some more fuel this morning too :)
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • cowboypjfancowboypjfan Posts: 2,453
    Another one to keep you busy? :D

    Congrats to you!
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    Im sorry...

    I read your original post a few times...
    And was convinced it was the baby's dad who was going to get shut out.....

    Guess I need more coffee.....hehehehe

    Congrats Grandma!!!
    Same here. Apologies!
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    crazypjfan wrote:
    Another one to keep you busy? :D

    Congrats to you!

    thank you!

    yep!, and all pre-schoolers and kindergartners (pheww exhausting..but fun!)

    but this is her first!

    she is my baby :D
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    hedonist wrote:
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    Im sorry...

    I read your original post a few times...
    And was convinced it was the baby's dad who was going to get shut out.....

    Guess I need more coffee.....hehehehe

    Congrats Grandma!!!
    Same here. Apologies!

    no worries :D
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • Pamela0222Pamela0222 Posts: 1,544
    Congrats!!! Babies are so fun, I wish that your circumstance was different but, in turn it's his loss.
    The thing I like most about time is that it's not real. It's all in the head. Sure, it's a useful trick to use if you want to meet someone at a specific place in the universe and have tea or coffee- but that's all it is- a trick. There is no such thing as the past. It exists only in the memory. There is no such thing as the future. It exists only in our imagination. If our watches were truly accurate, the only thing they would ever say is "Now". That's what time it is. It's "Now". - Damien Echols
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    Pamela0222 wrote:
    Congrats!!! Babies are so fun, I wish that your circumstance was different but, in turn it's his loss.

    thanks so much :D
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • birdwing54birdwing54 Posts: 2
    "You can spend your time alone,
    Redigesting past regrets.
    Or you can come to terms and realize,
    That you're the only one,
    Who cannot forgive yourself.

    Makes much more sense,
    To live in the present tense."

    Don't carry around baggage, live for the people you love in your life right now. Dwelling on the past will only keep you from seeing the present, and you'll inadvertently hurt the people you love now.
  • Leyna MinaiLeyna Minai Posts: 691
    Oh Congratulations! No matter the situation, that is happy news :)
    Your daughter will be the best mother to her baby!
    7/15/2011 - Benoroya Hall - (Eddie Vedder Solo) - Seattle, WA
    4/2/2008 - The Center in Vancouver for Performing Arts (Eddie Vedder Solo) - Vancouver, WA
    9/21/2009 Key Arena - Seattle, WA
    7/22/2006 - Gorge Ampitheater - George, WA
    9/1/2005 - Gorge Ampitheater - George, WA
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    birdwing54 wrote:
    "You can spend your time alone,
    Redigesting past regrets.
    Or you can come to terms and realize,
    That you're the only one,
    Who cannot forgive yourself.

    Makes much more sense,
    To live in the present tense."

    Don't carry around baggage, live for the people you love in your life right now. Dwelling on the past will only keep you from seeing the present, and you'll inadvertently hurt the people you love now.


    you are absolutely right!

    thanks for that

    i nearly forgot all about those words...sacrilege, i know :D

    i think i'll have a listen right about now...and maybe play it for her too

    she's not a big PJ fan...but she can "tolerate" eddie's voice when she thinks i'm not looking :lol:

    and you know they're all inspiration for me

    thanks so much for the reminder!
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    Leyna Minai wrote:
    Oh Congratulations! No matter the situation, that is happy news :)
    Your daughter will be the best mother to her baby!

    thank you Leyna :)
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • PureandEasyPureandEasy Posts: 5,815
    Congratulations Jo, enjoy your new grandchild.
    Don't come closer or I'll have to go
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    PureandEasy wrote:
    Congratulations Jo, enjoy your new grandchild.

    thank you! hope to see you soon...maybe fall Philly show? we'll see :D
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
  • PureandEasyPureandEasy Posts: 5,815
    StillHere wrote:
    PureandEasy wrote:
    Congratulations Jo, enjoy your new grandchild.

    thank you! hope to see you soon...maybe fall Philly show? we'll see :D

    that's pretty much what gets me up in the morning, is the hope for a fall Philly show :lol::lol:
    Don't come closer or I'll have to go
  • josevolutionjosevolution Posts: 30,510
    Congrats to you and the mommy to be i'm sure the baby will get tons of love from everybody on your side of the family :) ...
    jesus greets me looks just like me ....
  • StillHereStillHere Posts: 7,795
    josevolution wrote:
    Congrats to you and the mommy to be i'm sure the baby will get tons of love from everybody on your side of the family :) ...


    for sure jose!
    thanks so much :D
    peace,
    jo

    http://www.Etsy.com/Shop/SimpleEarthCreations
    "How I choose to feel is how I am." ~ EV/MMc
    "Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends." ~ One Stab ~
Sign In or Register to comment.