had that broken mirror under-foot
is why fruit rots
buried in wasted humanity
all destroyed years as far as all of it
what can not be understood rapes bone
from within (carcinogens) we are buried
our only sunshine consumed starves up & down golden staircases that are skyward-pain
here you can hear apples falling
pears being peeled, boiled & canned
with the sound of knives working hard
but in the easy ways of kissing her
sounding quietly each ear collects
what each ear collects sounding quietly
even bunnies in snow whisper their loving sounds
fear sounds
while winter still blows its pain against windowsills
birds at the feeder going away full
she still bathes them in her dreams
sleeping on that green grass her eyes shut
behind her eyelids up there
blue belongs tall above
moving along
tugging cloud-shapes at where she has thought of
it must ache for them
standing broken legs clouds
so they cry
There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
I haven't seen a spark in years I haven't felt whole in quite sometime. I haven't the zest for the life I'm living now. I haven't the energy or the tenacity that was, Once a part of my character. I haven't the words to describe just how it is, I Feel, If I feel anything at all. Anything at all.
I feel I'm walking a tightrope these days. Trying to keep calm when I know I might fall and crack my head open at any moment. Using my will to keep stray fears from gaining any energy, using my will to make some kind of plan. I'm determined to bravely approach whatever comes up.
These days, it's not really appropriate for me to be thinking about anything frivolous or unnecessary. Does that make sense? Whatever time I have is valuable.
I feel I'm walking a tightrope these days. Trying to keep calm when I know I might fall and crack my head open at any moment. Using my will to keep stray fears from gaining any energy, using my will to make some kind of plan. I'm determined to bravely approach whatever comes up.
These days, it's not really appropriate for me to be thinking about anything frivolous or unnecessary. Does that make sense? Whatever time I have is valuable.
I know what you mean by frivolous,and unnecessary. And yet sometimes we can't help ourselves.It's part of our nature. I could sit and think about how many more have it much worse.But will that make me feel any better about my situation.And if I put all my attention towards those less fortunate,I'll only view my own needs as selfish. Does that make any sense? Time, Itself is valuable. What you do with it, Is even more important. Irreplaceable,Irreversible.Never let fear decide your fate.
I sometimes think that time here, is spent frivolously. Then I remember how many great feelings have materialized because of what happenes here. Discoveries are made, misttakes sometimes happen and i learn from them. I need this frivolous place, and it works best for me and others, when I'm caught up with my responsibilities.
Post edited by TalonTedd on
I remember when, yeah. I swore I knew everything, oh yeah.
Time has stood still for me lately. I have so much stress,That I'm unable to function.I have so much going on upstairs,It's like a traffic jam in my head. Things I need to do,I can't seem to muster up the strength to carry out. I have headaches now,that I hardly ever had before.I can't seem to prioritize.I have less than two weeks left to find a place,because the house I'm renting sold.It's the middle of winter,So work is slow.My income is at an all time low.I haven't even boxed up anything yet.I just don't know where to start.I need to have a garage sale,But I can't seem to make my way to the garage, to sort stuff out. I'm landlocked in an ocean of thoughts.Maybe it's trivial,Maybe it's frivolous, either way,I'm overwhelmed.I hate starting over.Sometimes I just want to sell everything I own,and buy a backpack. But that would be running away from everyone I love.I don't know if it's me they need,Or me, needing them.Am I just rambling,Or can you understand??
I know what you mean by frivolous,and unnecessary. And yet sometimes we can't help ourselves.It's part of our nature. I could sit and think about how many more have it much worse.But will that make me feel any better about my situation.And if I put all my attention towards those less fortunate,I'll only view my own needs as selfish. Does that make any sense? Time, Itself is valuable. What you do with it, Is even more important. Irreplaceable,Irreversible.Never let fear decide your fate.
I appreciate your thoughts donnaruhl. Thanks for sharing them.
I read your other post above (about your own situation) and I hope things get better for you soon.
I sometimes think that time here, is spent frivolously. Then I remember how many great feelings have materialized because of what happenes here. Discoveries are made, misttakes sometimes happen and i learn from them. I need this frivolous place, and it works best for me and others, when I'm caught up with my responsibilities.
I am grateful for the kind people here. The openness of so many is wonderful!
I just got accepted into a rental. A huge weight has been lifted.I can breathe now.I have the freedom to work on the other issues that are clouding my visions for a better life.I can't begin to describe how relieved I feel at this moment. Happy,Happy Joy,Joy!
I just got accepted into a rental. A huge weight has been lifted.I can breathe now.I have the freedom to work on the other issues that are clouding my visions for a better life.I can't begin to describe how relieved I feel at this moment. Happy,Happy Joy,Joy!
I just got accepted into a rental. A huge weight has been lifted.I can breathe now.I have the freedom to work on the other issues that are clouding my visions for a better life.I can't begin to describe how relieved I feel at this moment. Happy,Happy Joy,Joy!
I'm starting to feel too sad to talk. That's not good. I know it's not good but I can feel myself drifting in that direction.
it would be stupid of me to say "try thinking nice thoughts" but I do understand what you posted I truley know that feeling when it comes upon me but the things I have done to stop that are life changes and choices, I sat many time and thought about what was doing this to me and then I started to pay attention to what was going on around me when this feeling came upon me and noticed things that I could change in my life to avoid certin feelings that brought me down, so over time I changed habbits and ...believe it or not I stopped eating sugary foods and that helped big time (and I lost a few pounds) but I realize we are all different and not everything works for everybody else but I truley believe that unhderstanding ones self is key to feeling better. what ever your situation I wish you well Justam.
Godfather, I appreciate the advice. I think this is the right idea. I need to focus on the precise things that are getting me down to pull myself out of this sad, helpless feeling. Thank you for taking the time to say something.
it would be stupid of me to say "try thinking nice thoughts" but I do understand what you posted I truley know that feeling when it comes upon me but the things I have done to stop that are life changes and choices, I sat many time and thought about what was doing this to me and then I started to pay attention to what was going on around me when this feeling came upon me and noticed things that I could change in my life to avoid certin feelings that brought me down, so over time I changed habbits and ...believe it or not I stopped eating sugary foods and that helped big time (and I lost a few pounds) but I realize we are all different and not everything works for everybody else but I truley believe that unhderstanding ones self is key to feeling better. what ever your situation I wish you well Justam.
Its my faaaavorite time of year again.....Tax season. and I'm sure all the wonderful warm fuzzy blokes at the CRA are waiting with baited breath for my 2014 return. Well, its coming tax man....try and control your exuberance. I would like to take the opportunity to re-assert my true feelings for all you kind people at the CRA and bring back a classic, titled
CHOKE ON IT TAX MAN How to evade the royal tax charade a slippery slope, federal ice ca-PAID. An annual ritual for the surfs in spring Like the flu-shot in fall, its gonna sting
NOTICE OF RE-ASSESSMENT We have questions about line 10, 11 and 16 How dare you employ these deductions we'll get to the bottom of this Like your severed head on our guillotine.
The cupboards are bare (blood sucking leach) be reasonable I plead!
Reason will cost surf. Penalties, fines and interest all the time Friends, they conjure their due with a shtick as old as the hills Armed with the power of God, in thine parliamentary bills.
To be clear, I used to be a happy tax paying member of Canadian society. Then Harper took the reins and turned us into something ugly, militaristic and corporate. I don't like him spending my tax dollars on war, oil, intolerance and the rich! GO AWAY!
I remember when, yeah. I swore I knew everything, oh yeah.
Its my faaaavorite time of year again.....Tax season. and I'm sure all the wonderful warm fuzzy blokes at the CRA are waiting with baited breath for my 2014 return. Well, its coming tax man....try and control your exuberance. I would like to take the opportunity to re-assert my true feelings for all you kind people at the CRA and bring back a classic, titled
CHOKE ON IT TAX MAN How to evade the royal tax charade a slippery slope, federal ice ca-PAID. An annual ritual for the surfs in spring Like the flu-shot in fall, its gonna sting
NOTICE OF RE-ASSESSMENT We have questions about line 10, 11 and 16 How dare you employ these deductions we'll get to the bottom of this Like your severed head on our guillotine.
The cupboards are bare (blood sucking leach) be reasonable I plead!
Reason will cost surf. Penalties, fines and interest all the time Friends, they conjure their due with a shtick as old as the hills Armed with the power of God, in thine parliamentary bills.
To be clear, I used to be a happy tax paying member of Canadian society. Then Harper took the reins and turned us into something ugly, militaristic and corporate. I don't like him spending my tax dollars on war, oil, intolerance and the rich! GO AWAY!
Nice one. I'm dreading the outcome of the"No Medical" penalties! They get their money either way.I'll be paying both taxes and penalties. :(
Comments
jam on talon
you are my spare car key
and you
you are my cup of tea
hot
is why fruit rots
buried in wasted humanity
all destroyed years as far as all of it
what can not be understood rapes bone
from within (carcinogens) we are buried
our only sunshine consumed starves up & down golden staircases that are skyward-pain
here you can hear apples falling
pears being peeled, boiled & canned
with the sound of knives working hard
but in the easy ways of kissing her
sounding quietly each ear collects
what each ear collects sounding quietly
even bunnies in snow whisper their loving sounds
fear sounds
while winter still blows its pain against windowsills
birds at the feeder going away full
she still bathes them in her dreams
sleeping on that green grass her eyes shut
behind her eyelids up there
blue belongs tall above
moving along
tugging cloud-shapes at where she has thought of
it must ache for them
standing broken legs clouds
so they cry
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
Oh, to get up out of this sadness and see some light!
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
"Kind words do not cost much. Yet they accomplish much." - Blaise Pascal
I haven't felt whole in quite sometime.
I haven't the zest for the life I'm living now.
I haven't the energy or the tenacity that was,
Once a part of my character.
I haven't the words to describe just how it is,
I Feel,
If I feel anything at all.
Anything at all.
Trying to keep calm when I know I might fall and crack my head open at any moment. Using my will to keep stray fears from gaining any energy, using my will to make some kind of plan. I'm determined to bravely approach whatever comes up.
These days, it's not really appropriate for me to be thinking about anything frivolous or unnecessary. Does that make sense? Whatever time I have is valuable.
Godfather.
I read your other post above (about your own situation) and I hope things get better for you soon.
Godfather.
That's not good.
I know it's not good but I can feel myself drifting in that direction.
what ever your situation I wish you well Justam.
Godfather.
CHOKE ON IT TAX MAN
How to evade the royal tax charade
a slippery slope, federal ice ca-PAID.
An annual ritual for the surfs in spring
Like the flu-shot in fall, its gonna sting
NOTICE OF RE-ASSESSMENT
We have questions about line 10, 11 and 16
How dare you employ these deductions
we'll get to the bottom of this
Like your severed head on our guillotine.
The cupboards are bare (blood sucking leach)
be reasonable I plead!
Reason will cost surf.
Penalties, fines and interest all the time
Friends, they conjure their due with a shtick as old as the hills
Armed with the power of God, in thine parliamentary bills.
To be clear, I used to be a happy tax paying member of Canadian society. Then Harper took the reins and turned us into something ugly, militaristic and corporate. I don't like him spending my tax dollars on war, oil, intolerance and the rich! GO AWAY!