Vicious things I've done.
Prince Of Dorkness
Posts: 3,763
I'm going to come clean. I'm not the nicest person. I'm always very pleasant to people but my "Mr. Hyde" side can... get the better of me.
1. I used to work a corporate job. Being a vegan, the restaurants in the neighbourhood didn't have much I would eat so I usually brought my lunch. Someone kept taking things of mine from the fridge. So a few days before I knew random drug testing was going to start, I started to bring in hash brownies and left them in the fridge in a bag. Oops.
2. My ex-boyfrined called me fat. So I broke into his house and cut the crotches out of all of his pants, spit in every jar in his fridge and peed in every one of his hair care products.
3. One of the guys from my floor in the dorm I lived at in college called me something rather nasty when I thought I wasn't listening. So I snuck into his room while he was at class, left a few pornographic gay magazines on his desk with a history book on top of them and then asked his room mate "have you seen my history book? I think your room mate borrowed it but I don't want to go in there without permission. Can you look for me?"
4. I drive home down highway 2 because it's kinda like the Autobahn. No speed limit. I've gone over 100 MPH down it. But there's always a cop under the 134 overpass. So I always get into the fast lane and about half a mile before, start going kinda slow, weave back and forth just a bit... to piss off the guy behind me. About 1/8 of a mile before, I pull over and let him pass me. He's always so frustrated by that point, he'll step on the gas and zip past me. Right into the speed trap. After which I'm free to accelerate back to 90.
5. When I lived in a warehouse near the lake in Toronto in the early 90s, the people downstairs used to come home late and make crazy noise. They used to smoke pot at all hours and then beat drums and chant. They used to have very loud sex. So I went on vacation and left a speaker flat on the floor along with a record that was skipping.
1. I used to work a corporate job. Being a vegan, the restaurants in the neighbourhood didn't have much I would eat so I usually brought my lunch. Someone kept taking things of mine from the fridge. So a few days before I knew random drug testing was going to start, I started to bring in hash brownies and left them in the fridge in a bag. Oops.
2. My ex-boyfrined called me fat. So I broke into his house and cut the crotches out of all of his pants, spit in every jar in his fridge and peed in every one of his hair care products.
3. One of the guys from my floor in the dorm I lived at in college called me something rather nasty when I thought I wasn't listening. So I snuck into his room while he was at class, left a few pornographic gay magazines on his desk with a history book on top of them and then asked his room mate "have you seen my history book? I think your room mate borrowed it but I don't want to go in there without permission. Can you look for me?"
4. I drive home down highway 2 because it's kinda like the Autobahn. No speed limit. I've gone over 100 MPH down it. But there's always a cop under the 134 overpass. So I always get into the fast lane and about half a mile before, start going kinda slow, weave back and forth just a bit... to piss off the guy behind me. About 1/8 of a mile before, I pull over and let him pass me. He's always so frustrated by that point, he'll step on the gas and zip past me. Right into the speed trap. After which I'm free to accelerate back to 90.
5. When I lived in a warehouse near the lake in Toronto in the early 90s, the people downstairs used to come home late and make crazy noise. They used to smoke pot at all hours and then beat drums and chant. They used to have very loud sex. So I went on vacation and left a speaker flat on the floor along with a record that was skipping.
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I'm not into messing with people who piss me off...I usually just grin and bear it!!! I know a few people that I'd love to mess with, but it'd come back and bite me in the but, someway somehow.
But that shit you did very funny.
A friend from college was that way...he didn't get made...he just got even...also the happiest fellow I ever met...always wondered if their was something to his theory.
"Life Is What Happens To You When Your Busy Making Other Plans" John Lennon
SOOOOOOO I took my acetone based nail polish remover, and wrote "cocksucker" on the hood, ""asshole" on the trunk.. filled the door panels with raw fish, and threw horse shit in the gas tank. He drove.. a BMW.
The Boss knew what all had happened and fired the other guy for killing my dog.. ( there was an autopsy done, and it turned out he fucked himself, cause he was the only person on property known to have this particular chemical), and simply took half of the cost to fix the vehicle out of my checks in installments..
WOW.
OK, I'll tell you... someone hurt one of my dogs... I'd be right there with you.
I particularly like the rotting fish part.
Years later when I was 17 or so I had a summer job working at a cafe. There was a guy who would come in everyday and have at least 10 free refills on his ice tea...really annoying guy...and he also kept asking me out everyday...which was even more annoying...One day he really got on my nerves so I decided to put some laxatives in his ice tea. My dad had a pack of Dulcolax at home and I took ten pills and crushed them, put them in a zip lock bag and brought it to work. As soon as I saw the guy enter the cafe I prepared his special drink and gladly brought it over to his table. I have to admit that I felt a bit bad afterwards.
He is the type that flops into bed, I still laugh about it.
For future reference, two squeezes of Visine does a better job. Instantly.
Customers who called me "The Help" had a very bad time at the singles bar I worked at.
"Life Is What Happens To You When Your Busy Making Other Plans" John Lennon
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that guy sucks
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
"she just snitched her brother off," is what i thought to myself... i didn't hear the shot. the bullet rested just under bear's skin along his backbone you could feel it and see the hole, not much blood.
"bear's been shot but is fine," i said to dad
we drove to town and aquired a wire / fence cutting tool
later that evening/night i hacked his fence to shit leaving very large holes wide open for the cattle to escape
he had many a head of iowa grain fed cattle wandering about in the road, other fields, and in the timber. then i threw his (edit) into the ditch. it only weighed 232lbs. (it was an old dairy canister filled with cement)
"good luck you old bastard" :evil:
these people murdered animals for entertainment and caused me a lot of sadness.
fuck them... even his kids shot dogs that were just wandering along on their way
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
probably the worst thing i have ever done was kick someone in the head during a bar fight.
i was with a group of about 10 friends at a bar in college and a four or five of my friends were across the bar playing pool. i didn't know what triggered the thing, but all of a sudden a pool ball goes flying across the bar and shatters the mirror hanging on the wall a few feet away from me. i looked in the direction from where it came and i see my friends fighting with some other guys. it was 7 on 3, with the 3 being my friends. so myself and a few of my friends ran across the bar to try to break up the fight. or at least even the odds, as the 7 dudes were kicking my friends's asses. so i grabbed this guy from behind and just tried to pull him off of my friend who was lying face down in a pool of blood. the guy turned around and swung wildly at my head and hit me on the side of the head. i grabbed him and wrestled him straight back against the wall and he tried to shove me aside and get back in the fight and he tried to gouge right eye with his hand. so i hit him square in the jaw and he dropped like a rock and did not move for a good 30 seconds. i then turned to another guy to pull him off of another one of my friends and the guy i hit had come to and had crawled over to me and tried to grab one of my legs to pull me down. i was able to step out of his grasp and i turned around and i saw him on his hands and knees facing me trying to grab my leg again and i sidestepped him again. i had a second to think about it and what was happening and how you are always told to not kick a guy who is down...i paused, and that split second of contemplations felt like it lasted a minute. when you are in a fight everything seems like it is in slow motion. he kept coming at me so i remember in the back of my mind saying "fuck it!" i hauled off and punted the guy's face with my right foot. he was out cold for good that time. i hit him so hard his nose exploded and i had his blood all over the front of my ankle, shoes, and the cuffs of my pants. it actually hurt my foot and the front of my ankle for sevral days afterward i kicked this guy so hard. next thing i remember was going back into the fray, pulling a few more guys off of the pile and grabbing the rest of my friends and barrelling out of the side exit. we didn't wait around for the cops to show up.
i feel really bad about kicking that dude. it used to keep me up at night sometimes because i can still see his face. but i had to do it. he was going to hurt me or one of my friends had he gotten up to his feet. i didn't even want to punch the guy in the first place. i just wanted to pin him up against the wall to keep him out of the fight because he was a big dude and could have done a lot of damage. we ran back to our house down a main street and it was obvious to anyone who saw us we had been in a fight. we were all beat up, had torn clothing and in a few cases blood all over, whether our own or someone else's. the funny thing is several police cars and a couple of ambulances sped past us going to the bar as we were running away from it. none of us were ever caught. turns out what started it was one of my friends was lining up a shot and the back end of the cue stick hit one of the other guy's beers and knocked it over, spilling beer on him and his girlfriend.. he apologized to the guy and offered to get the guy a new beer, but that guy and his boys wanted to fight instead.... all of that chaos over a stupid spilled beer.
another time i broke a guy's arm in a mma fight. i got him in an armbar and he would not tap, so i gave him a little more torque and i felt it POP and heard him scream. i don't feel as bad about that because it was obvious he was not getting out of it and i was not letting go and in my head i kept saying "come on man TAP!!" but he never did...dumbass...
"Well, you tell him that I don't talk to suckas."
just out of curiosity, which part?
"Well, you tell him that I don't talk to suckas."
Which part of me got turned on?
Um... well I got in trouble posting a link to a picture of it once.
I think #2 and #4 are kinda dick moves. Actually, #2 is pretty damn creepy.
The rest, no big deal.
I have nothing on that level of things that I've done. But I'm going to think about it and see if I blocked something from my memory.
Godfather.
...are those who've helped us.
Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
Godfather.
bro...your avatar freaks me out. :shock:
Godfather.
Not sure that's the word I'd use.
More "vindictive" and "manipulative" than anything else.
I do think we all try to be good people... Sometimes our tempers get the better of us.
edit...
you're mean
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
hehe
You might have been doing him a favor if he ever travels to that vacation place in Key West!
filled my socks & shoes with blood
was awesome
guess im not the girl he was just beating on
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
i killed a bunny once...
.... i was 4 years old. :evil:
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
#2 is called being a sociopath.
#4 is called being just plain psycho.
Fargo 2003
Winnipeg 2005
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St. Paul 2014