Bin Laden ....Jokes Already ??
Godfather.
Posts: 12,504
:shock:
Bin Laden targeted by TV's late-night humorists
By FRAZIER MOORE, AP Television Writer Frazier Moore, Ap Television Writer
Tue May 3, 11:13 am ET
.NEW YORK – Osama bin Laden's death not only dominated the news Monday, but also fueled a wealth of comic relief, punch lines and unapologetic crowing from TV's late-night hosts.
"You seem like you're in a good mood," said CBS' David Letterman, greeting his "Late Show" audience with a grin. "You folks enjoy the Osama bin Laden season finale?"
Over on NBC, "Tonight Show" host Jay Leno was all smiles, too, as he declared, "It looks like President Obama has a new campaign slogan: 'Yes I Did.'"
"Great news," said Conan O'Brien on his TBS talk show. "The world's most wanted man, Osama bin Laden, is dead. Which means now the official No. 1 threat to America is the KFC Double Down."
"It was the first Twitter death rumor ever that turned out to be true," cracked Jimmy Kimmel on ABC.
"Bin Laden is dead!" said "Late Night" host Jimmy Fallon on NBC — "just like the Republicans' chances in 2012."
And on CBS' "Late Late Show," host Craig Ferguson gave extra oomph to his trademark pronouncement, "It's a great day for America, everybody!"
"I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl who just shot bin Laden in the eye," glowed Stephen Colbert on "The Colbert Report," adding, "I hope I am never again this happy over someone's death."
Colbert's fellow Comedy Central host, Jon Stewart, was no less effusive on "The Daily Show."
"I suppose," he allowed, "I should be expressing some ambivalence about the targeted killing of another human being. And yet — uhhhh, no!"
Instead, Stewart said, he wanted details. Like, what was the look on bin Laden's face when he realized "the helicopters overhead were not giving traffic and weather updates?"
Letterman's Top Ten, "fresh from the State Department," purported to list bin Laden's final words, which might have been "I'm not sure I want to live in a world where 'Fast Five' is the No. 1 movie," or maybe, "I need a house full of Navy SEALs like I need a hole in the head."
The jokes — and there were many — were focused on a handful of basic themes. Like the courageous Navy SEALs who took bin Laden out.
According to O'Brien, "When he heard about it, former President Bush was furious and said, 'Wait a minute — I could have used seals?!'"
"How about those Navy SEALs?" marveled Letterman. "They jump out of a helicopter and they break into the compound, and they fire a warning shot into his head."
"Well, the good news is," he added, invoking another prevalent theme, "bin Laden lived to see the royal wedding."
"Between the death of bin Laden and the marriage of Kate Middleton and Prince William," Kimmel said, "it's an exciting time to be in the commemorative plate business."
But what will happen to bin Laden in the next life?
Fallon disclosed that the 72 virgins supposedly awaiting the al-Qaida leader in paradise had turned out to be "just some dudes watching 'Game of Thrones' on HBO."
Letterman had another theory: Owing to a screwup in the paperwork, they were 72 vegans.
The comics took glee in lampooning Donald Trump, who, as an undeclared GOP candidate for the presidency, has noisily questioned both Obama's citizenship and college scholarship.
On NBC, first word of bin Laden's death pre-empted the final few minutes of Sunday's East Coast airing of the Trump-hosted reality show, "Celebrity Apprentice."
"This," said O'Brien, "begs the question: How do we kill bin Laden again NEXT Sunday?"
Kimmel observed that, "On the same night Obama was ordering the Navy to kill bin laden, his potential opponent in 2012, Donald Trump, was busy firing Playmate of the Month Hope Dworaczyk."
And on "Late Night," Fallon impersonated Trump in a sketch, stating that Obama "is so scared of me and so desperate for attention that he felt the need to hunt down and kill bin Laden right in the middle of my show."
Online, much of the comedy reaction revolved around positioning Obama as an action hero. Making the rounds was a picture of a determined Obama and the label: "Everyone chill ... out, I GOT THIS!"
Another photo showed a smiling Obama in sunglasses and suit with the caption: "Sorry it took so long to get you a copy of my birth certificate. I was too busy killing Osama bin Laden."
One of the most popular topics on Twitter through much of Monday was Jack Bauer, the fictional government agent of "24." The Jack Bauer messages typically reflected a pride in the Navy SEALs who carried out the mission.
But Steve Martin took his own, pointedly ironic approach to the startling events: "Slow news day," he tweeted
Bin Laden targeted by TV's late-night humorists
By FRAZIER MOORE, AP Television Writer Frazier Moore, Ap Television Writer
Tue May 3, 11:13 am ET
.NEW YORK – Osama bin Laden's death not only dominated the news Monday, but also fueled a wealth of comic relief, punch lines and unapologetic crowing from TV's late-night hosts.
"You seem like you're in a good mood," said CBS' David Letterman, greeting his "Late Show" audience with a grin. "You folks enjoy the Osama bin Laden season finale?"
Over on NBC, "Tonight Show" host Jay Leno was all smiles, too, as he declared, "It looks like President Obama has a new campaign slogan: 'Yes I Did.'"
"Great news," said Conan O'Brien on his TBS talk show. "The world's most wanted man, Osama bin Laden, is dead. Which means now the official No. 1 threat to America is the KFC Double Down."
"It was the first Twitter death rumor ever that turned out to be true," cracked Jimmy Kimmel on ABC.
"Bin Laden is dead!" said "Late Night" host Jimmy Fallon on NBC — "just like the Republicans' chances in 2012."
And on CBS' "Late Late Show," host Craig Ferguson gave extra oomph to his trademark pronouncement, "It's a great day for America, everybody!"
"I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl who just shot bin Laden in the eye," glowed Stephen Colbert on "The Colbert Report," adding, "I hope I am never again this happy over someone's death."
Colbert's fellow Comedy Central host, Jon Stewart, was no less effusive on "The Daily Show."
"I suppose," he allowed, "I should be expressing some ambivalence about the targeted killing of another human being. And yet — uhhhh, no!"
Instead, Stewart said, he wanted details. Like, what was the look on bin Laden's face when he realized "the helicopters overhead were not giving traffic and weather updates?"
Letterman's Top Ten, "fresh from the State Department," purported to list bin Laden's final words, which might have been "I'm not sure I want to live in a world where 'Fast Five' is the No. 1 movie," or maybe, "I need a house full of Navy SEALs like I need a hole in the head."
The jokes — and there were many — were focused on a handful of basic themes. Like the courageous Navy SEALs who took bin Laden out.
According to O'Brien, "When he heard about it, former President Bush was furious and said, 'Wait a minute — I could have used seals?!'"
"How about those Navy SEALs?" marveled Letterman. "They jump out of a helicopter and they break into the compound, and they fire a warning shot into his head."
"Well, the good news is," he added, invoking another prevalent theme, "bin Laden lived to see the royal wedding."
"Between the death of bin Laden and the marriage of Kate Middleton and Prince William," Kimmel said, "it's an exciting time to be in the commemorative plate business."
But what will happen to bin Laden in the next life?
Fallon disclosed that the 72 virgins supposedly awaiting the al-Qaida leader in paradise had turned out to be "just some dudes watching 'Game of Thrones' on HBO."
Letterman had another theory: Owing to a screwup in the paperwork, they were 72 vegans.
The comics took glee in lampooning Donald Trump, who, as an undeclared GOP candidate for the presidency, has noisily questioned both Obama's citizenship and college scholarship.
On NBC, first word of bin Laden's death pre-empted the final few minutes of Sunday's East Coast airing of the Trump-hosted reality show, "Celebrity Apprentice."
"This," said O'Brien, "begs the question: How do we kill bin Laden again NEXT Sunday?"
Kimmel observed that, "On the same night Obama was ordering the Navy to kill bin laden, his potential opponent in 2012, Donald Trump, was busy firing Playmate of the Month Hope Dworaczyk."
And on "Late Night," Fallon impersonated Trump in a sketch, stating that Obama "is so scared of me and so desperate for attention that he felt the need to hunt down and kill bin Laden right in the middle of my show."
Online, much of the comedy reaction revolved around positioning Obama as an action hero. Making the rounds was a picture of a determined Obama and the label: "Everyone chill ... out, I GOT THIS!"
Another photo showed a smiling Obama in sunglasses and suit with the caption: "Sorry it took so long to get you a copy of my birth certificate. I was too busy killing Osama bin Laden."
One of the most popular topics on Twitter through much of Monday was Jack Bauer, the fictional government agent of "24." The Jack Bauer messages typically reflected a pride in the Navy SEALs who carried out the mission.
But Steve Martin took his own, pointedly ironic approach to the startling events: "Slow news day," he tweeted
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments
Love that one.
"Becoming a Bruce fan is like hitting puberty as a musical fan. It's inevitable." - dcfaithful
2 shots and a splash of water
two shots with a splash
damn
you beat me to it
it's so wrong
and so funny
"what a long, strange trip it's been"
madeleine mccann
that's fucked up, funny, but fucked up.
The BIN LADEN IS DEAD thread seems to have stalled at 666 posts...
96: Cork, Dublin
00: Dublin
06: London, Dublin
07: London, Copenhagen, Nijmegen
09: Manchester, London
10: Dublin, Belfast, London & Berlin
11: San José
12: Isle of Wight, Copenhagen, Ed in Manchester & London x2
That's because he finally arrived to hell
Letterman was brilliant last night on the subject. A classic 3 minutes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI0mJUR0U5M
1998: Barrie
2000: Montreal, Toronto, Auburn Hills
2003: Cleveland, Buffalo, Toronto, Montreal
2004: Boston X2, Grand Rapids
2005: Kitchener, London, Hamilton, Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto
2006: Toronto X2
2009: Toronto
2011: PJ20, Montreal, Toronto X2, Hamilton
2012: Manchester X2, Amsterdam X2, Prague, Berlin X2, Philadelphia, Missoula
2013: Pittsburg, Buffalo
2014: Milan, Trieste, Vienna, Berlin, Stockholm, Oslo, Detroit
2016: Ottawa, Toronto X2
2018: Padova, Rome, Prague, Krakow, Berlin, Barcelona
2023: Chicago X2
2024: New York X2
- MJK
1998: Barrie
2000: Montreal, Toronto, Auburn Hills
2003: Cleveland, Buffalo, Toronto, Montreal
2004: Boston X2, Grand Rapids
2005: Kitchener, London, Hamilton, Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto
2006: Toronto X2
2009: Toronto
2011: PJ20, Montreal, Toronto X2, Hamilton
2012: Manchester X2, Amsterdam X2, Prague, Berlin X2, Philadelphia, Missoula
2013: Pittsburg, Buffalo
2014: Milan, Trieste, Vienna, Berlin, Stockholm, Oslo, Detroit
2016: Ottawa, Toronto X2
2018: Padova, Rome, Prague, Krakow, Berlin, Barcelona
2023: Chicago X2
2024: New York X2
Bro.....this post was just a smile buster no offense but really ?
Godfather.
That is unbelievable. True as of this moment.
My favorite pic is the one of Obama playing PlayStation or whatever while watching it go down. Someone here posted it in that thread. Not sure if they did it or not, but it's pure genius.
I was watching letterman last night and when he said this I howled.
1998: Barrie
2000: Montreal, Toronto, Auburn Hills
2003: Cleveland, Buffalo, Toronto, Montreal
2004: Boston X2, Grand Rapids
2005: Kitchener, London, Hamilton, Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto
2006: Toronto X2
2009: Toronto
2011: PJ20, Montreal, Toronto X2, Hamilton
2012: Manchester X2, Amsterdam X2, Prague, Berlin X2, Philadelphia, Missoula
2013: Pittsburg, Buffalo
2014: Milan, Trieste, Vienna, Berlin, Stockholm, Oslo, Detroit
2016: Ottawa, Toronto X2
2018: Padova, Rome, Prague, Krakow, Berlin, Barcelona
2023: Chicago X2
2024: New York X2
WHO CAUSED THE YANKS LOTS OF DRAMA
HE GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD
NOW HE IS DEAD
THATS WHAT I CALL FUCKING KARMA
Experts agree that this was probably due to the BOUNTY on his head
That only works in an English, Aussie or Boston accent...
96: Cork, Dublin
00: Dublin
06: London, Dublin
07: London, Copenhagen, Nijmegen
09: Manchester, London
10: Dublin, Belfast, London & Berlin
11: San José
12: Isle of Wight, Copenhagen, Ed in Manchester & London x2
Im as aussie as as vegimite mate
wait a minute the yanks own that now
I guessed that from your sig
96: Cork, Dublin
00: Dublin
06: London, Dublin
07: London, Copenhagen, Nijmegen
09: Manchester, London
10: Dublin, Belfast, London & Berlin
11: San José
12: Isle of Wight, Copenhagen, Ed in Manchester & London x2
http://video.teamcoco.com/video/conan.j ... arethisUrl
"Becoming a Bruce fan is like hitting puberty as a musical fan. It's inevitable." - dcfaithful
that's what i call fucking
funny as hell
"what a long, strange trip it's been"
- Dear Osama
I WIN!
Sincerely Waldo.
http://stronys.blogspot.com/2011/05/osa ... -dead.html
1998: Barrie
2000: Montreal, Toronto, Auburn Hills
2003: Cleveland, Buffalo, Toronto, Montreal
2004: Boston X2, Grand Rapids
2005: Kitchener, London, Hamilton, Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto
2006: Toronto X2
2009: Toronto
2011: PJ20, Montreal, Toronto X2, Hamilton
2012: Manchester X2, Amsterdam X2, Prague, Berlin X2, Philadelphia, Missoula
2013: Pittsburg, Buffalo
2014: Milan, Trieste, Vienna, Berlin, Stockholm, Oslo, Detroit
2016: Ottawa, Toronto X2
2018: Padova, Rome, Prague, Krakow, Berlin, Barcelona
2023: Chicago X2
2024: New York X2
some one called a church and asked for two memorial services and the person who took the call wrote it down
lollllllllllssssss
Our government is the potent, the omnipresent teacher. For good or for ill, it teaches the whole people by its example. Crime is contagious. If the government becomes a law-breaker, it breeds contempt for law; it invites every man to become a law unto himself; it invites anarchy. - Louis Brandeis