how do i...

Brain-o-Jordan

make myself feel better when i just lost a 4 year relationship? it's all my fault, theres still hope we will be together again but that wont be any time soon how do i get through this? honestly i feel empty and dont know what to do.

pjfan31

watch the notebook dude...

81

hookers and blow :?:
















i kid i kid....don't want to get yelled at.

enjoy the pain, move on. that's about it.

StillHere

http://youtu.be/gct6BB6ijcw

BinauralJam

Try not to dwell too much

LikeAnOcean

Masturbate until your hand falls off.

Harvtron

Music always works for me. Though if you and your Girl friend both enjoyed PJ, then it might not be best to listen to them. Being around other friends also helped me a lot. Pot also helped a bit but I started to look to Pot far too much to cheer me up. In the end, I found that help from my Friends and time, was the only thing that made me feel better. I know it hurts now, but it will go away at some point I promise. It might just be awhile.
No matter how bad it is now it will get better.

Kilgore_Trout

jeez... sympathetic crowd... can we give him some real advice before getting into the nonsense?

avoid being overly dramatic or stalkerish as that will prevent any chance of future rekindling (thought its unhealthy to dwell on that remote possibility too)

delete your facebook if that will help... delete her number from your phone if that will prevent drunk dials (how old are you? )

don't do anything blatantly to look like you're "over her" like immediately dating on the rebound... just live your life as close to normal as you can

surround yourself with friends and the things that you love

just take time to appreciate yourself and find who you are again... you'll probably find you're a new person on your own now than you were going into the relationship... enjoy that

StillHere

i was being sympathetic ...and serious

i thought he'd like to hear ed's words on the subject
and that it actually might make him feel better..you know, kinda like...OK I'm not alone, if ed went through it and made it out then i can too....

pinkbutterfly

That's great advice, Kilgore. I hope you feel better soon, Brain-o-Jordan.

Fifthelement

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

jeez... sympathetic crowd... can we give him some real advice before getting into the nonsense?

avoid being overly dramatic or stalkerish as that will prevent any chance of future rekindling (thought its unhealthy to dwell on that remote possibility too)

delete your facebook if that will help... delete her number from your phone if that will prevent drunk dials (how old are you? )

don't do anything blatantly to look like you're "over her" like immediately dating on the rebound... just live your life as close to normal as you can

surround yourself with friends and the things that you love

just take time to appreciate yourself and find who you are again... you'll probably find you're a new person on your own now than you were going into the relationship... enjoy that

Sorry to hear about your troubles OP. KT has given you some great advice though. Let yourself feel the pain but don't dwell. Learn from your mistakes and make an honest effort to improve yourself and move on. I wish you well and remember . . . There's always a springtime ahead . . .

mookeywrench

Temporarily keep her completely out of your life, surround yourself around good people and things you love (excluding her). When you realize that life goes on and you feel over her, then you can slowly bring her back into your life.

LikeAnOcean

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

jeez... sympathetic crowd... can we give him some real advice before getting into the nonsense?

avoid being overly dramatic or stalkerish as that will prevent any chance of future rekindling (thought its unhealthy to dwell on that remote possibility too)

delete your facebook if that will help... delete her number from your phone if that will prevent drunk dials (how old are you? )

don't do anything blatantly to look like you're "over her" like immediately dating on the rebound... just live your life as close to normal as you can

surround yourself with friends and the things that you love

just take time to appreciate yourself and find who you are again... you'll probably find you're a new person on your own now than you were going into the relationship... enjoy that

My response was a little uncalled for with the hope that sometimes dark humor lightens things up. Probably not in this case, but my best bit of advice for the poster is, surround yourself with positive things. Visit an old friend. Play some good music. Watch a favorite movie. Do things that don't remind you of the relationship. Don't necessarily find a rebound girl, but put yourself out there for new love interests and stay positive.

It's all state of mind.. Most of us have or will be there.

To the original poster, you are not alone.

Kilgore_Trout

Gob wrote:

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

jeez... sympathetic crowd... can we give him some real advice before getting into the nonsense?

avoid being overly dramatic or stalkerish as that will prevent any chance of future rekindling (thought its unhealthy to dwell on that remote possibility too)

delete your facebook if that will help... delete her number from your phone if that will prevent drunk dials (how old are you? )

don't do anything blatantly to look like you're "over her" like immediately dating on the rebound... just live your life as close to normal as you can

surround yourself with friends and the things that you love

just take time to appreciate yourself and find who you are again... you'll probably find you're a new person on your own now than you were going into the relationship... enjoy that

My response was a little uncalled for with the hope that sometimes dark humor lightens things up, probably not in this case, but my best bit of advice for the poster is, surround yourself with positive things. Visit an old friend. play some good music, watch a favorite movie. Do things that don't remind you of the relationship. Don't necessarily find a rebound girl, but put yourself out there and stay positive.

It's all state of mind.. Most of us have or will be there.

To the original poster, you are not alone.

oh i didnt mean you, gob

your advice is the best so far

just don't picture your ex while doing it... that's unhealthy

CAVSTARR313

I know what worked for me. I went out and dated and boned as many chicks as I could. Some may say this is unhealthy, but I created so much craziness and mayhem in my life that I literally had no time or energy to think about my Ex.. and before I knew it, it was just a distant memory.. Good luck and sorry about your loss, but "no matter how cold the winter....."

81

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

Gob wrote:

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

jeez... sympathetic crowd... can we give him some real advice before getting into the nonsense?

avoid being overly dramatic or stalkerish as that will prevent any chance of future rekindling (thought its unhealthy to dwell on that remote possibility too)

delete your facebook if that will help... delete her number from your phone if that will prevent drunk dials (how old are you? )

don't do anything blatantly to look like you're "over her" like immediately dating on the rebound... just live your life as close to normal as you can

surround yourself with friends and the things that you love

just take time to appreciate yourself and find who you are again... you'll probably find you're a new person on your own now than you were going into the relationship... enjoy that

My response was a little uncalled for with the hope that sometimes dark humor lightens things up, probably not in this case, but my best bit of advice for the poster is, surround yourself with positive things. Visit an old friend. play some good music, watch a favorite movie. Do things that don't remind you of the relationship. Don't necessarily find a rebound girl, but put yourself out there and stay positive.

It's all state of mind.. Most of us have or will be there.

To the original poster, you are not alone.

oh i didnt mean you, gob

your advice is the best so far

just don't picture your ex while doing it... that's unhealthy

kilgore doesn't like hookers or blow....

he's missing out.

:P

RYEzupSF

Sorry to hear. Fill up your time. With whatever it may be: hanging with friends, family, hookers, blow, bangin, working out, whatever feels right for you. Good advice to eliminate her from your life for awhile. You will be thinking about her enough and every bit of contact will make you crazy. With time you will move on and rediscover who you are without her. This time really sucks though. HAng in there. You will get through this.

Brain-o-Jordan

Thanks everyone, everyone helped.

Poncier

Gob wrote:

Masturbate until your hand falls off.

Then switch to southpaw.

PureandEasy

learn from your mistakes, you acknowledge it's all your fault

I'm making a huge assumption that you were unfaithful, otherwise, it most likely would not be all of your fault, it never is unless it's that blatant a mistake.

pandora

Brain-o-Jordan wrote:

make myself feel better when i just lost a 4 year relationship? it's all my fault, theres still hope we will be together again but that wont be any time soon how do i get through this? honestly i feel empty and dont know what to do.

see life as a path and a blessing.... try to have faith in that
'this as all things shall pass'
find your own peace...if that is with friends, in music, work, family, wherever, whatever peace is for you.

learn from mistakes and love yourself... soon love will return and better than ever.

Heisenberg

Take (2) Vitalogy's a day...really loud for about a week. If you don't start feeling better by then, switch to Vs.

PearlOfAGirl

mookeywrench wrote:

Temporarily keep her completely out of your life, surround yourself around good people and things you love (excluding her). When you realize that life goes on and you feel over her, then you can slowly bring her back into your life.

Also, remember time will help you get through this pain...

dunkman

Gob wrote:

Masturbate until your hand falls off.

if i still had my thumbs i'd put them up for advice as great as this.

Kilgore_Trout

81 wrote:

kilgore doesn't like hookers or blow....

he's missing out.

:P

theres a time and a place for hookers and blow, 81

usually on my heart shaped bed... underneath my mirrored ceiling

81

Kilgore_Trout wrote:

81 wrote:

kilgore doesn't like hookers or blow....

he's missing out.

:P

theres a time and a place for hookers and blow, 81

usually on my heart shaped bed... underneath my mirrored ceiling

well done.

ok, serious reply

communication is the key. you all need to take a couple of days off, think about what you both really want, than have a open discussion about your futures.

ShimmyMommy

81 wrote:

ok, serious reply

communication is the key. you all need to take a couple of days off, think about what you both really want, than have a open discussion about your futures.

this ^^ and then accept whatever the outcome happens to be.

81

ShimmyMommy wrote:

81 wrote:

ok, serious reply

communication is the key. you all need to take a couple of days off, think about what you both really want, than have a open discussion about your futures.

this ^^ and then accept whatever the outcome happens to be.

i still think hookers and blow is the answer :P

ShimmyMommy

81 wrote:

ShimmyMommy wrote:

81 wrote:

ok, serious reply

communication is the key. you all need to take a couple of days off, think about what you both really want, than have a open discussion about your futures.

this ^^ and then accept whatever the outcome happens to be.

i still think hookers and blow is the answer :P

well, guess we can't rule it out as a possibility

LikeAnOcean

dunkman wrote:

Gob wrote:

Masturbate until your hand falls off.

if i still had my thumbs i'd put them up for advice as great as this.

I can no longer use writing utensils myself.